Although the tongue weighs very little, very few people are able to hold it. -Anonymous
Question #1564 posted on 11/21/2003 4:02 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,
What's with the plastic wrap on all of the statues on campus?
- Amethyst

A: Dear Amethyst,
BYU vs. U of U. Huge rivalry. Upcoming game. They have less respect for property than BYU students (hopefully) do, and it has been that way for years. The plastic wrap is to prevent U of U students from spray painting our sculptures red. There was an article on that subject a year or two ago in the Daily Universe, but a search of said newspaper's Web site merely yielded an "error executing database query," so you will have to find that one yourself.
A: Dear Amethyst,

What Eowyn said. And if you'd like to help guard statues or protect the campus from raiding visagoths like those in SL, you can become an Intercollegiate Knight. During Homecoming, they do overnight watches by the Y. Anyway, I don't really understand the syran-wrap thing. I mean, if I really wanted to paint a statue that badly, I'd pack a pocket knife and make a neat little incision in the wrap. Stick the can in. SHHHHHHHHHHHHHP! Then, if I were feeling really artistic, I'd tape the rip I'd made closed again. Boy, wouldn't they be surprised to see that their statue had magically changed colors underneath the protective covering. Must have had an allergic reaction to all that plastic. Too bad.

A: Dear Amethyst,
They laminate them each year to keep people from vandalizing them. Personally, I think they'd look better painted red than they do covered in saran-wrap. Oh well.