"Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons." - Woody Allen
Question #27288 posted on 11/02/2002 midnight

Dear 100 Hour Board,
Why do items B1, B2, B3, B4, and B5 never work in the drinks machine in Q Hall basement?

A: Dear Drinkaholic,
Originally, we were going to sum up your answer in two words ("It's broken"), but our kinder, gentler side prevailed, so we made the long arduous trek up to DT and Q Hall, and there discovered an amazing fact: they work just fine. In fact, we purchased items from every machine in the B1-B5 range, and all of them worked (and you owe us $23.60). Our guess is that you didn't properly insert the $1.25 necessary to purchase orange juice, or that your personal magnetic field was on the kenicky.
A: Dear Thirsty,
To help prepare freshman for the trials and adversity they will face in the rest of their lives. It's only going to go downhill from here, so get used to it.
-Der Berliner