If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, forget em', cause, man, they're gone. –Jack Handey
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Since we've had Helen Thomas give a "forum" during our politically correct Tuesday morning enlightenments, I know who could truly do a political forum justice.

George F. Will.

(I was going to say Michael Savage or Dennis Miller, but I don't want Utopians slashing my SUV's tires or smashing in my windshields.)

A good proposal? He'd make Helen Thomas look like a Jesse Jackson (keeps talking, but no one bothers listening anymore.)

What say you?

- Jack Bauer

A: Dear Jack,
Probably. A good proposal actually. There's nothing more we need in here than forgetting that this student body is intolerable of said speakers. We can't do much about inviting him, but if you really wanted to try and voice it, perhaps the administration could take you up on your suggestion.
- The Paragraph Designer, 1 List:Bullet 2