Dear 100 Hour Board regarding Board Question #41413,
This can't be happening. It is not in CATS' nature to do something so sane, even if there is brainwashing involved. 100 Typing Monkeys, I fear that CATS will try to take another monkey despite all of your "friendship" sessions. Stay on your guard!
- Monkeys shall conquer the Earth and then those evil scientists will have to type all day long!
I'm not exactly sure what you're talking about. I have taken all the monkeys out to lunch a couple of times in gratitude for their benevolence. You fear that I will take another out to lunch? I'm so confused.
I, CATS, would never do anything to hurt my friends, especially 100 Typing Monkeys. That would be so vile and base. All of it just seems so wrong! I don't know why you say it is not in my nature to be.. nice?
Friend, if I may call you so, I am not mad at your writing. I wish, though, that you would not make accusations without proof. I have no harmful intentions. Time will make it known.
We understand your concern, friend. Especially in light of CATS past behavior. But, let us put your mind at ease and assure so that you may rest assured with confidence that CATS has changed. CATS is now kind and capable of speaking coherently. And he gives us gifts. CATS has been made to see the light and logic of understanding, and will forever be a friend of the monkeys.
-100 Typing Monkeys