If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, forget em', cause, man, they're gone. –Jack Handey
Q:

Dear Langue d'Ork
It is a sad thing you missed the French Ambassador. He was quite interesting, entertaining, and especially informative. It is unfortunate that more Americans are not like the French; I have yet to meet a Frenchman, and I've met quite a few, that has a personal vendetta against an American, but plenty of the reverse situation. The French can distinguish between a nation's government and a nation's people and you should try to do the same. I believe it is a point of higher education to teach the pupil not just the points of view of another but the actual mindset, for if that is learned then the understanding become more deeply genuine.
- Louisianna