"I'm not a chicken. I'm just really hesitant." -Frasier Crane
Question #88891 posted on 02/05/2017 8:55 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I hesitate to ask this as few if any have accomplished such a feat. So fair warning, this is kind of a big deal. Now is the time to brace yourself if you're into that kind of thing. But anyways, I just completely used up a ballpoint pen. No. Applause is not necessary. I am but a mortal, just like you. I mean perhaps I have reached a higher and holier sphere. But still just a mortal. That being said, my question. What comes next?

Should I expect the Congressional Medal of Honor? A Nobel Prize? Are my days as a common citizen spent? Should I invest in a dark pair of sunglasses and long trench coat? Please advise.

-Very Accomplished Man

P.S. - I'm sorry if this question is a hard one to answer because of the emotional toll this will surely take on you. I myself, still but a mortal, am equally amazed and enervated at the thought of such an incredible and awesome feat. Thank you for your brave services thus far rendered.


Dear Epitome Of Human Accomplishment,

I had to plumb deep into my reservoirs of writer omniscience in order to divine your answer for what comes next:

A new ballpoint pen.

I shall now retreat back to the mountains of knowledge and great wisdom.



Dear VAM,

If you want to truly prove yourself, I challenge you to use up entirely a Large Pentel Hi-Polymer Block Eraser.

-Frère Rubik has been correcting (and re-correcting) over a year's worth of math and physics problems with his, and has only used up maybe one fifth of the total eraser.


Dear person,

Try seeing if you can use up all the ink in this pen with a seven year ink supply. I bought myself one because I tend to keep pens for a long time and I get sad when they die. I'm excited about this one lasting a long time! Also, there are refillable ink cartridges, so I could have it for the rest of my life. No more sad pen deaths. And I'll probably only have to refill it 8 or 9 times before I die, which is kind of nice (and also weird - usually I don't think about my lifespan in terms of pen refills, and now that I just did my life feels very... finite).