If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, forget em', cause, man, they're gone. –Jack Handey
Question #89969 posted on 07/09/2017 10:56 a.m.

Dear Keepers of Mystical Legends,

I have heard stories of a sleeping Native American woman who lies on top of Mount Timpanogos. I have not seen her until today, when I was entering I-15 from the Lehi Main Street on-ramp. Shazam! There she was, repining gracefully on a 300-million-year-old bed.

If said woman suddenly awoke and stood to her full height, how tall would she be? Assume that her head starts on the left side of Timp, if you are facing it from the west.

-One-Winged Angle


Dear One-Winged Angle,

Well I'm not actually in Utah currently but if the average person is about 20 inches long when born and dies at 80 years old at abut 65 inches long then a person on average gains about .5625 inches a year.

A 300-million-year-old woman would thus be about 168,750,000 inches tall, or about 2,660 miles tall which is almost exactly the horizontal width of the United States.

Extrapolation is fun!

Keep it real,
Sherpa Dave

posted on 07/09/2017 4:45 p.m.
Depending on where you have the head and feet, she would stand about 5 to 5.5 miles tall.