My kisses are sort of limited to...well, female human things. -Claudio
Question #91424 posted on 06/09/2018 10:30 a.m.

Dear Tipperary (and others),

Please tell me a story about an embarrassing or hilarious experience you’ve had recently.

-Rainbow connection


Dear Connection,

Here's something really embarrassing that happened recently. When I saw that you specifically asked this question to me I was like "Do the readers think that I'm particularly embarrassing?" "Does Rainbow Connection know who I am? Does she know my embarrassing personal experiences?"And that's when I realized that you asked Board Question #91206 which asked us what type of questions we like to answer. I said that I like to tell stories, so you asked me to tell a story, and I had a mini freak out over it. Real smooth Tipperary...

Anyways, that's an incredibly short story so I won't stop there. A few months ago I had a trio of mishaps very close together. They were pretty awkward in the moment, but they make for good stories now. I guess good things do come in 3. Or maybe that was bad things...



There was this event that I really wanted to go to but I needed a date for. I was trying to figure out who to ask, and I remembered a girl from a class I had taken the semester before. So I decided to call give her a call, but it turns out that between the class and when I asked her out that she had started dating someone. Pro tip: don't ask out people who are dating someone. You will feel awkward and foolish.


So I managed to find a date for the event that I really wanted to go to. The event was on campus so I decided to get ready early and do homework while I waited for my date. So I went home, got dressed and ready to impress, put on some cologne, and went up to campus to study. So I'm waiting for my date to show up when she texts me to tell me that she had to stay late at work and wasn't going to make it for our date.

So there I was all dressed up with nowhere to go. So I spent the rest of the night with my homework. It wasn't too bad though. My homework was very impressed and we had a lovely night together.


Shortly after the first 2 stories took place, I started talking to a girl that I had dated in high school. Specifically she's the girl that I attempted to kiss in Board Question #90481. If you don't feel like reading the link,we didn't kiss, and things ended badly. Anyways, we started talking and I suggested that we go on a date the next time she was in town. She said she couldn't make it down to Provo, but she invited me to go to her brother's wedding reception a week later. I thought that going with my ex to her brother's wedding reception was a bit of an odd date, but I accepted.

So a week later I'm getting ready to go up to the reception and she texts me and says "Just FYI, I have a date." Wait, she has a date? That's not me? So, due to some misunderstanding, I thought that I was going on a date with her to the reception. Turns out, she thought that the invite was separate from me asking her out. So instead of going on a date with my ex, I was about to 3rd wheel my ex at her brother's wedding reception.

As fun as that sounded, I already had enough awkward for the month so I texted her and backed out. 


I hope you enjoyed reading those stories as much as I did writing them. They were awkward in the moment but just thinking about them makes me laugh now. Good times.




Dear Rainbow,

Because Disney World is a vacation destination that attracts so many families with young children, there are specific policies we have to follow when a registered sex offender is requesting to visit. We collect specific information like phone number and prospective travel dates and do some background research, and will contact the guest within 4 business days to give them a final answer on whether or not they'll be allowed to visit.

Last week I spoke to guest who was wanting to travel with a family member of hers who is a registered sex offender. The guest wasn't entirely satisfied upon hearing our policy, as she was hoping for a more immediate decision. I told her that unfortunately there was no way for me to guarantee anything, but if she could provide the information we needed, she would be hearing back shortly.

The guest replied that she didn't feel comfortable providing her relative's information without his permission, which is a valid point. However, she then asked if hearing the story of why he's a sex offender would allow me to make a definite decision.

I answered negatively.

She still told me the story.

It was awkward.

I have no idea why she would consider his sexual history to be fair game for sharing with strangers, but his phone number is private information.