Dear 100 Hour Board,
What's the best advice you've ever heard?
Grad School Advice
It's hard to imagine non-grad school advice because I feel like my life began when I started grad school and will end when I leave. It's a life within a life. Sorry I talk about it so much. Anyways, what came to mind immediately was the best grad school advice I ever heard: "You will disappoint someone every week. Just make sure it's not the same person." It's been really helpful. I'm a bit of a people pleaser and I put a lot of pressure on myself and this advice has helped me to achieve much more balance than I would have otherwise. Some due dates are less of a big deal than others. Some things are a bigger deal than others. Things work out in the end.
Real Life Advice
I sat a while trying to think of something and realized I remember mostly a lot of bad advice that I have come to passionately disagree with. It means almost as much to me as good advice. The main one that comes to mind is this: "Hope for the best but expect the worst." My mother used to say this a lot and I hated it at the time. Now I flat-out disagree with her. I don't want to go through my life with low expectations, thanks. It definitely dampens the mood.
Other not great advice I feel I was given involved people pushing me to forgive other people ASAP for my own good before I was ready. It mostly made me feel bad about myself and like my feelings were stupid. It also made me angrier than I was before. And I was afraid I was in the wrong for reacting the way I did. Then I was also afraid of my feelings. What a mess. Anyway, now that I have had a good amount of time since the heyday of that, I have a bit more perspective. I trust my own feelings more now and am comfortable taking as much time as I need to be with my feelings. They aren't bottomless pits that I will fall into and never return from so it's all cool.
Dear Rilly Real,
I don't know about the best advice ever, but my parents always encouraged us to try new foods. When we traveled we always ordered things we never tried before and it was a lot of fun. I think it helped us to be open to new experiences. At the very least it introduced me to some really awesome foods.
Mistakes can be your greatest learning opportunities. Thankfully I keep making about a hundred of them each day so that advice isn't easily forgotten.
-guppy of doom
Silly:The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Serious: If you neglect your friendships too often or for too long, eventually your friends will move on.
That second one was from some 65 year-old German and his 73 year-old wife who have somehow been traveling for the better part of 19 years. I met them in Paraguay last year and I have been trying to think about what actually makes me happy. Maybe travel is a part of it (and travel is over-romanticized, but that's another topic), but it's really, really nice to have people who you know and appreciate and who know and appreciate you in return. Life is weird, frustrating, fun, and challenging, so it's nice to face it alongside someone else.
--Ardilla Feroz, having an unsatisfying time just barely inside the Angolan exclave of Cabinda
It's too hard to sort through all the great life advice I've heard through the years to find the absolute best piece. So instead I'm going to share the best fashion advice I've ever gotten: wear what makes you feel beautiful.