Dear 100 Hour Board,
Worst rejection story?
-Burn baby burn
Oh man. So many options to choose from! While I have a plethora of rejection stories, there's one that I think was just the worst. Once upon a time when I was but a freshman, I met this cute girl in my orientation group. I asked her out on a date and it was really fun. I didn't talk to her too much after that though. About a month later I decided that she was cool and I wanted to go out with her again. So I called her up and asked her "Hey, what are you doing this Friday?" to which she responded "I'm going on a date with my boyfriend. Why do you ask?"
Not only did I feel the immediate embarrasment of trying to ask out a girl who had a boyfriend, but I was also forced to come up with an explaination for why I was asking her. I was by the Wilk when I called her and while I knew that nobody knew what was going on I felt like all of campus was staring at me and the awkward situation that just went down. I turned bright beet red, came up with some lame excuse, and then hung up in embarassment. Ah good times. It felt terrible at the time but it's a good laugh now.
Once upon a time, specifically in 2013 when I was a freshman, my ward was having a get-to-know-you activity. In this activity, I learned that a man in my ward had the last name Disney. As an avid Disney fan, I decided I should get to know him.
So I walked up to him and said in my dry manner, "Hi, I'm Kira. It's nice to meet you. We're going to have to get married." Great start, right? I thought it was funny.
He laughed awkwardly and replied, "Oh, because of the last name?"
I nodded, and he again chuckled.
And then he never spoke to me again.
We were in the ward together for eight months after that and he literally never said another word to me.
Dear Disco Inferno,
I liked a guy in high school for a long time. He knew I liked him and just didn't say anything about it. We kept hanging out, I planned an elaborate birthday party for him. He didn't talk to me the whole time and dodged my hugs at the end. A few weeks later he came out as gay. It hurt at the time, but now I just laugh. We stayed friends after... it's hard to be offended when the guy literally just isn't attracted to girls in the first place.
Also, can I just say that there are lots of cringy rejection stories out there... and sometimes it's fun to hear about them from those who have had to endure them, knowing that eventually you can move on and it'll all turn out alright. I'm glad we can all relate to those. But I do want to take a second to add some perspective and raise some awareness for the countless women and men who have been drugged, raped, abused, assaulted, or even murdered for turning someone down. I think it's fair to say they deserve the title of worst rejection story. Everyone should have the right to reject someone's advances without fearing for their own safety, and we should also be mature enough to handle that kind of event with grace and respect. Sorry for taking the fun out of it, I just didn't feel good about leaving that out. There was a horrible news story this week that reminded me that this is still all too common. Those people who suffer like that ought to be remembered and serve as a reminder to the rest of us to be good sports in the dating field.
Dear Burn ~
I don't have any real good rejection stories, but there was one boy that I was head over heels for. I had a 2-week dating curse, and this guy made it 3 weeks. I was ecstatic. He was incredible. We had a great time together. The only thing that bothered me was that he would hold my hand the whole date, but as soon as we entered our apartment complex, he would let go of my hand. Every time.
After 3 weeks he took me on a walk, broke up with me, and told me that it wasn't because there was another girl or anything, he just felt strongly that he should focus on school right now. He was very complimentary and every bit as gracious in his breakup as I would have expected him to be. But I was completely heartbroken.
A week later, in church, in the row in front of me in sacrament meeting, he put his arm around another girl in our complex. They were engaged within a few months. I don't think his roommates even knew we had been dating, because at one point one of his roommates (that I was friends with!) came over to our apartment and started gushing over how cute of a couple he was TO MY FACE until my much more bold roommate chewed him out for it. I was mortified, but thankful to her.
So that was fun.
~ Dragon Lady
I asked this one girl on a date by walking over to her apartment, knocking on her door, and asking her on a lunch date. She replied, "Um, no, I'm busy tomorrow for lunch." So I asked for a different day. The response: "Actually, I'm pretty busy for the next few weeks." I know when I'm being rejected, so I decide to bug out before I look pathetic. I tell her to have a nice day and walk away. I get about 50 feet away from her door before she comes out and yells after me to wait. "This is it!" I think, "she realizes that passing me up isn't worth her busy schedule. She's into me!" I turn around and wait for her to catch up. She looks me in the eyes and says, "I'll tell you what. If something opens up in the next two weeks, I'll call you." Interest lost. Also, she did not call. And she had a boyfriend on the day I asked her in the first place (which I didn't know and she didn't tell me).
I mean, seriously, chasing after me to string me along like that? Not impressed. Also, I felt like a loser for like a week. I look her up on facebook every so often. She's single.
The Man with a Mustache
Way back when at BYU, my ward had some kind of opt-in dating event where you got randomly matched with someone else in the ward to go on a date with. I got matched with the Elders' Quorum President who was dumb but attractive so I was like, "Eh, I'll give it a shot." When I called him to set up our date, he told me he was "too busy." No offer to reschedule, no other explanation. Obviously he was just very uninterested! It was a double burn on me because he had actually organized the whole dating match, so the prospect of a date with me must have been really awful for him to just give up on his own event.
Anyway, he's balding and still lives in Provo so apparently I dodged a real bullet.
I had a gigantic crush on an emo drummer kid during junior year of high school, and it was no secret. We spent a fair amount of time together. We even went to prom together. In the summer after that prom, my cousin came from out of state to go to EFY with me. She spent a few extra days with my family. As girl cousins of an age, we talked about boys—so she knew all about emo drummer kid.
On my cousin's final night in the state, my friend group did one of our favorite traditions. We laid blankets out in my parents' deep, dark country yard and looked at stars and meteors while low-key cuddling. But during the stargaze, I looked over and saw cousin holding hands with emo drummer kid. For a good long time. They'd known each other for about three days. It broke my little high school heart.
Months later, the Sunday school lesson was about forgiveness, and I felt like it was just for me. But my mother? My mother has not forgiven cousin to this day.
And, much like the stories above, I definitely dodged a bullet on emo drummer kid.
On to greener pastures,
Waldorf (& Sauron)
For about a year prior to graduating BYU, I was really interested in this guy. The problem was that we were in the same friend/study group and had the majority of our classes together. Because of all that, I didn't want to ask him on a date or anything--the possibility of things getting super awkward in so many areas of my life was too real. However, a couple of weeks before we graduated, I finally got up courage to ask this guy to dinner. I cooked t-bone steaks, balsamic-vinegar-roasted vegetables, and creme-brulee (which all tasted amazing, by the way). Literally two days later, he was talking all about a big date he had planned for the weekend with some other girl who he was really into, and how important it was to him that this date go really well. Overall, he made it blindingly clear he had zero interest in me--just in this other girl and steak.
I felt probably way too much perverse pleasure when the girl cancelled on him last minute.
Finally, when we graduated the next week, he hardly even looked at me whenever we were talking (you know, despite our being friends for the past few years). BYU photography even got a picture of us having a conversation together, and of course his face is turned the opposite direction from me. My mom picked up on all of this and later told me she thought this guy was kind of a jerk for ignoring me the way he did given how long we'd been friends.
After about 45 minutes of talking to a dude on Hinge a few months ago, he asked what area of LA I live in. I told him, and he immediately unmatched.
And honestly, I respect it.