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Question #92790 posted on 12/22/2019 5 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

There's lots of pills to make someone's chest grow bigger, but the general consensus is that they're a waste of money. My question is: why? Why is it so difficult to make a pill to make a women's chest get bigger? If a man can be given hormone treatments that can result in him gaining more feminine-appearing breasts, why can't a woman be given something to increase hers?

Thank you,

not blessed in that department

A:

Dear sister,

A free-form poem for you, though you probably don't want to hear it.

 

AA

Hail, sister! you can run! and get groceries without a bra!

 

bathing suits      up

flannels             buttoned

underwires        optional


boob sweat, just sweat

staring, just staring.

 

gloriously inglorious boy-shaped femininity

simple.

you are part of a family,

the sisterhood of small tits

 

Babalugats

A:

Dear friend, 

I think many people feel like being bigger will make them happier or more satisfied with their bodies. You are perfect the way you are, and from somebody who HAS been genetically "blessed" in that department, it's anything but a blessing most of the time. You're perfectly entitled to do what you wish, but don't let society - or any man you may be in a relationship with - tell you that having a bigger chest makes you more feminine or more beautiful or more attractive. Cuz it ain't true. 

Cheers, 

Guesthouse

A:

Dear Blessed In Other Ways,

Story time! One of my roommates got a 'free trial' of some 'breast enhancing lotions' once since it was supposed to be a free sample. But she's a little naive, didn't read the fine print, gave them her credit card information -sigh- ...and so she got charged for it. She had to talk to her bank and the company about it to try and get the charge reversed. Since she was so sweet and loving it actually worked. She used the lotion, but there were no differences. 

BUT based on your genetics, if your mother/sisters had their chest grow when they were pregnant, then you'll likely be the same way! Unfortunately, for my roommate, she is pregnant now and her chest hasn't grown, whereas my genetics had the complete opposite effect while being pregnant. BUT AGAIN, once your milk comes in and you start breastfeeding, you'll grow then too. After you stop breastfeeding your chest may go back to its original size (don't quote me on that, but that's just based off experiences I've heard).

I found this Harvard health article where they said, "Estrogen and progesterone are the only natural hormones we know of that increase breast size. But as you may know, studies have linked excess estrogen and progesterone with breast cancer, heart disease, and stroke in postmenopausal women." But... pretty sure you're not postmenopausal. The article says nothing about premenopausal, rude! 

I found a couple articles that don't exactly answer your question entirely, but they do mention the companies that do sell these pills aren't regulated by the FDA, so they can scam people and claim that they do work. Perhaps this is why people don't care enough to do some actual research and make a pill that works that without terrible potential side effects.

-Goldie Rose

posted on 12/23/2019 8:52 a.m.
In regards to the quote from the Harvard study, just to make sure it isn't misunderstood, extra estrogen/progesterone (as from birth control pills, for example, or unregulated tata enhancers) can cause breast cancer later in life. As in the case of my mother, who had taken birth control pills from the early 1960s at various times going forward, she developed breast cancer after menopause (she had a unilateral mastectomy, and has been fine for 16 years now). So, it doesn't mention pre-menopausal women but it still can affect you years after the fact. Bigger boobs probably aren't worth that risk.

- daughter of a cancer survivor