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Question #92874 posted on 01/29/2020 8:12 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What do you if you really really hate your job?

I have mental health problems and have moved in with/relying financially on family for the past several months. I just started a full-time job and I hate it. It's both (moderate) physical labor and super monotonous. I don't really like my coworkers either.

Should I quit? I don't want to be miserable every day. I've been there less than a week and have cried about the job twice. I don't want to impose on my family but I can't see myself continuing this job for any reason other than the money. My family wants me to be happy, but they believe financial independence will make me happier. They might be right, but at what cost?

I totally acknowledge that I'm in a really privileged situation to both have a job and have my family as a financial support system. But should I take advantage of the support while I have it and look for a better-fitting job instead?

-Red Herring


Dear Blue Trout, 

At the very least, I think you shouldn't feel guilty about asking for help if you need it. It takes strength and courage to do that, but it doesn't make you a burden. 

I think the other writers do a good job of looking at different options. I think at the time you asked the question, it may have been smart to stick it out for just a few more days to see how it went, like Anathema pointed out. But, if by the time this answer posts and you still feel like crying all the time, I think you should probably start looking for something new and plan to move on. (And maybe you already have! In which case, good for you.) 

Relying on your family for just a little bit longer to find something that you will be happy doing for the long term is the best way to go - especially if your family can handle it. I would hope that they would be understanding about your mental health enough to agree with your course of action so you should be honest with them about it. 

If you want to make it easier, you can try to help out around the house, get some of your own supplies/needs. I live at home right now and buy all of my own personal hygiene products and pretty much anything except for food. 

I hope things work out well for you and you can ultimately find something you are happier about that doesn't hurt you as much. 

Love and best wishes, 



Dear Crimson Misleading,

Weigh your pros and cons, including their implications. Even if the only pro of your job is the money, how much is that money worth to you? How much do you value financial independence? 

My personal advice to you would be to keep this job for the time being, but look in earnest for a different job. In general (I won't say this is necessarily the case for you, because I don't know you, the scope of your mental health issues, or how distasteful your current job is), people are perfectly fine having a miserable job for a while. It's not a place anyone wants to stay in, but it's bearable for at least some time.

Speaking as a person who has been dealing with anxiety and depression since I was in elementary school, just because something is hard on your mental health doesn't necessarily mean you should abandon it. 



Dear Fish,

I would suggest sticking it out for at least a little bit longer. You've been on the job less than a week, and at least for me that's never been long enough to adequately gauge how much I like something. That doesn't mean you can't be actively looking for something that's a better fit, but I wouldn't suggest quitting until you've found something else.

I do think financial independence is a good way to achieve satisfaction, and having money is a good step towards improving mental health, whether in terms of receiving adequate health care, having hobbies, or reducing anxiety. Plus you never know, your current job could be providing experience that'll help you down the road. I wouldn't have gotten my current job that I love if I didn't have the experience I gained in my least favorite jobs.




Dear Smoked Fish,

Like Anathema suggested, I would make a pros and cons list. Or even just write down what you are thinking and feeling about this job, so you can get it out of your system and think about what to do next in both a logical and emotional way. Some questions you could consider are: 

- How does this job negatively impact your life? Physically? Emotionally? Socially? Mentally?

- Do you have a plan? Could you get another job?

- Have you felt this way before at a new job?

- Why do you want to stay at this job? Why do you want to leave?

Also, while you might've already done this, I'd suggest talking with your family so that they know how you are doing, that you understand their value of financial independence, and what you're thinking about doing. Maybe they'll be able to offer advice and support, but at least you won't feel all alone in making this decision.