No man is defeated without until he has first been defeated within. - Eleanor Roosevelt
Question #5858 posted on 05/24/2004 12:03 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

In regards to the question earlier posed by The Absinthian Warrior, a question we (guys) all have sometimes-- "Does she like me or is she just a flirt?" One time I heard of an idea, probably too radical and blunt for anyone to do it but it would get results: Every guy and girl walk around with a small whiteboard on a string around their neck. On that whiteboard write your "top 5" people you're interested in...So, for a guy, he writes his top 5 girls and then when he sees one of them he looks for his name on her whiteboard. If he's on her list then they are a match, but if he's not on her list, she erases her name off his list and he fills in another girl onto his top 5 (presumably his #6, for example.) It would work the same way for girls, the guy either matches up with her or erases his name off her list and then she writes in another guy's name. What do you think?

- Ironical C -

A: Dear Hope you aren't serious,

That is just what we need, for FCSM's stereotypical Utah boy and girl to have white boards around their necks. Like BYU isn't already made fun of enough!

-CGNU Grad
Question #5853 posted on 05/24/2004 12:03 a.m.
Q:

Dear Toasteroven,

Sorry man, but read the Tenth Amendment. Federal aid for college students is very much NOT constitutional. States, charity organizations, rich people, etc. could do it, but not the federal government. But who cares about the Constitution.

- The Constitutionalist

A: Dear Constitutionalist,

The Amendments are not technically part of the Constitution itself. But you knew that. Let's check this out. Tenth Amendment....
"The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people."
Originally, education and all of its attendant details were the states' responsibilities. Of course, Amendment nine allows for the assignation of other rights in the future. The supremecy clause, along with the necessary and proper clause, have also been instrumental in assigning federal powers not enumerated in the Constitution.
Student loans fall under "social welfare policies," and the national government has been involved in education funding since the Northwest Ordinance in 1785. To quote my government text, "Constitutional justification for the national government's involvement with public education rests on a broad view of its delegated powers, such as taxing and spending for the general welfare." They have the right to collect and distribute tax money. A great deal of funding justification has been made in support of the equality guarentee in the fourteenth amendment. Some students or local school districts did not have the funds for proper education and were therefore "discriminated against." So, the federal government stepped in and offered its tax dollars to help alleviate this inequality. (Federal money still accounts for only an average of 7% of public school funding.) The expansion into student loans for college began with the GI Bill for World War II veterans, and as college education has become increasingly necessary for success in the business world (and lack of college degrees often means more government money spent on welfare programs), funding has increased.

~Eowyn
Question #5851 posted on 05/24/2004 12:03 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Just wanted to thank FCSM for the wonderful comments on "Utah Mormons", although for someone who sticks so closely to church doctrine on important issues such as kissing and R-rated movie it's odd that she would take something like this so lightly. Last time I checked elitism, cultural, religious, or otherwise was considered wrong. Perhaps before you go knocking any scriptures out of peoples hands or pointing at the nifty blue plaid or jeer at their choice of music you could stop to think that, hey wait, the rest of the world makes fun of even "mainstream mormons" for reading scriptures, wearing modest clothes or not listening to filthy music.
Come Judgement Day I honestly doubt that anyone is going to much care if a socially backward kid from Utah chose to wear his brand new denim suit to school, prayed in the Cannon Center and stayed home on a Friday night to read scriptures. Cut them some slack just like you've been cut yours at times throughout your life. I'm sure someone will say I am overreacting, can't take a joke etc. but you try having a negative stereotype attached and perpetuated by people who should know better and then we'll talk.

Card Carrying "Utah Mormon" who has worn denim/jeans less then 10 times in his entire life, never walked through the quad holding his scriptures and detests LDS pop music, but thinks there is much worse music to be woken up to. :)

A: Dear Utah Mormon,

It might interest you to know that I don't have anything against Utah Mormons--in fact, Utah Mormon boys are the ones I've like dating the best. In the past, I've really gone for the Utah boys... just something wonderful about the way they're raised here, or something. My fiancee isn't from Utah (he's originally from CA) but he's lived the last 8 years in Utah so I guess he's close enough.

Anyway, chill out a bit. I was taking the stereotype to the extreme. It was meant to be funny. I hardly doubt anyone thought I was being 100% serious. And my point in describing the stereotype wasn't to maliciously spread it further; someone asked a question and I answered it.

- FCSM
Question #5849 posted on 05/24/2004 12:03 a.m.
Q:

Dear The Captain,

I'd like to make an addition to what you said in response to the question about party affiliation asked by Issanomics. I think that a lot of people might just be confused about the difference between Republican/Democrat and conservative/liberal. As an Oregonian, I'm usually much more conservative in my views than the majority of those around me. But when I'm in Utah, I feel like I'm surrounded by people who are, for the most part, more conservative than I am. Nothing about me or my views have changed, but I, for the sake of clarity, usually refer to myself as a conservative in Oregon and a more of a moderate-liberal when in Utah. Perhaps this is what others mean, but are confusing their terms.

There's one more thing I'd like to point out. I know it was meant as a broad generalization, but I didn't find your "I am a nobody" syndrome to be correct. When I was a freshman, I didn't feel that way at all, and neither did any of my friends, to my knowledge. Maybe it was a more widely spread condition than I thought, but I never saw much of it, especially the symptom that was your main point -- that they declared themselves Democrats just to be different. The people I knew, even as freshmen, weren't so petty and self-deceptive. I concede that you were probably right about some -- and I can't say a thing for the post-mission male, though I see more truth in that analysis -- but I'd like to say, for the record, that such things shouldn't be assumed as a blanket steriotype.

I love reading your responses and rarely have reason to differ in any major way, but I thought clarity in this case was needed.

Thanks,

Forelithe

A: Dear Forelithe,

I agree that using that analysis as a blanket stereotype is wrong. I have seen plenty of people succumb to what I was talking about. I does not happen to everyone, but it does happen to a sizeable minority of the RM guys and freshman girls. Thanx for the clarification and thank you for your commentary.

The Captain
Question #5828 posted on 05/24/2004 12:03 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,
I know a lot of bikes on campus are impounded or confiscated by the Provo police for various reasons. I figure there's a big pile of them somewhere and as I am currently looking for a bike I would be interested in knowing where it is and how I can get one. I heard something yesterday about an auction, but I don't know anything about it. Do you have any information for me?

- Kindra

A: Dear Kindra,
Up by DT at the Traffic Office they have a small impounded bicycle lot. I saw it when I went to pay my parking ticket (curse you, BYU parking police!). They auction off the bikes every year in April, so if you want to try to score a sweet deal you'll have to wait a year. Contact the BYU Parking and Traffic Services for more info at (801)378-3906.

-Benvolio
A: Dear Kindra,

Yup, ditto to what Benvolio said. It does happen to be the University Police, and not the Provo Police. The auction is ussually at the stadium in April, but there are very few bikes that are worth while. Also, the auction is first come/first serve, and people start lining up hours beforehand.

-Phoenix
A: Dear Kindra,

I'd also like to send a shout-out curse to the BYU Parking Police. On a side note, don't go buy one of those bikes at auction. Just hop the fence, cut the lock and steal one. Hey, that's what they did to get 'em in the first place.

-Thor
Question #5827 posted on 05/24/2004 12:03 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I was having a conversation with an elder in my home ward the other day, and he mentioned that his engagement was one of the worst periods of his life, simply because he loved his fiancee, was a hot-blooded young man, and to him the time between the agreement and the date seemed to move infinitesimally. So, on to my question--To both the ladies and gentlemen of the Board, it's popularly purported that one's engagement is the happiest time of one's life, but in your experience, is that true? If not, why?

- faint Canaries

A: Dear faint Canaries,

I've been engaged almost two weeks. My life is out of control. I'm in the process of trying to get it back in control. I work 8-5 and am with my fiancee till 10 at night. I get home, get ready for bed, and go to bed. I don't see my roommates anymore. I don't have time to do my dishes, or clean my room, or even write for the Board. And I may be getting another part-time job in the next week (yay for extra income) which means I'll be even busier. As a result, I've told FCSM's Fiancee that I need to be home by about 9 every night, so I can get some stuff done before I go to bed. Additionally, when I get that part time job, I'm going to need to cut back the time I spend with him. We'll have dinner every night together, but M-Th I'll be heading home around 7 to work the rest of the evening. It won't be fun, but we need the extra income. (I wasn't kidding when I said we'd be happy to accept Target gift cards through the Wilk Board box.) It's great to be engaged, but I hear it's much better to be married.

- FCSM
A: Dear faint Canaries,

Engagement has been way stressful for my roommate. But then, she's here in Provo and he's in California right up until their wedding in August.

-Not engaged yet...
A: Dear faint Canaries,

Odd, not sure why he saw his engagement as misery, perhaps he was overly focused on consumating his love for his fiance' and saw it as a destination rather than a journey. If eternity has no end then perhaps there is no final destination in a relationship, only the continuing journey which the two of them are blessed to have together. For myself the only misery thus far are wedding/housing/job preparation stresses and such, but overall I've been much happier now than I was before, and I was quite happy before. So I can only imagine now that marriage will bring new challenges and stresses but also greater rewards thus greater happiness. Ever since meeting the love of my life, I cannot recall a happier time.

One more thing, I would think an excessively long engament period would be misery (such as one year) as it would invite more opportunity for trouble...but I can only say that from speculation and what other friends have said. There is definately an undeniable physical desire that seems to escalate as time passes, especially in the engagement period. Even your bishop will tell you about this and why it's best not to have a long engagement period. Although I feel any actual "misery" would stem from over focusing on the physical side of things during your engagement and looking to the "wedding night" as some sort of destination or arrival point. Like... people who wait for a year in line at a movie theater just to make sure they get the first tickets to see StarWars III. Or they count the days till they can pickup the new Zelda game/Harry Potter book/LotR extended edition...etc from the store. Not a practice of good mental health.

- FCSM's Fiancee
A: Dear Faint,
I'm not sure why people think the engagement period is the happiest of their lives. It's okay, but nothing spectacular. You're in love with each other and you're getting ready to start a new life together. That's cute and all. But there's a lot of preparations to make, and it can get complicated and stressful too. If you happen to be a lustbucket (to use the recently coined term) then I suppose the engagement period might seem a long time. Mine was three or four months, and that seemed about right to put together a nice little wedding and make the necessary flight plans and arrangements. I wouldn't do it again because I like how things are now better. But being engaged was fine, if not too different from before.

-Benvolio
A: Dear faint Canaries,

Being married is better. Engagement is just the period between getting up the courage to propose (after having almost done it five times), and getting married. It's a waiting period, with lots of stress. Not that being married doesn't include stress, but the happiness is much greater as well. Yeah. Being married is SO better.

~Eowyn, who's going to go get her hubby off the other computer now and go to sleep
A: Dear faint Canaries,

I would say that it can be a great time, but it is not always. Both Ma Grape and I agree that our engagement was too long. Dating is the time to decide whether to marry someone. An engagment should only be long enough to make the arrangments for the ceremony.

We did our best to follow that, but with both of us in school, it was proving too difficult to try to marry in the middle of the semester, so we put it off until after the semester had ended.

It was enjoyable, but it "got old" quickly.

-Pa Grape
A: Dear faint Canaries-

An engagement is a very real and important part of a relationship. When engaged, as FCSM and her fiancé noted, couples spend even more time together. Others also adjust to thinking of the couple as a single entity as well. It is also the time to _talk_ about sex. It isn't appropriate to discuss before then, but if you don't talk before you get married, you're looking for trouble. Engagements also give people a chance to understand what committment to their future spouse really means. It is much better to have a broken engagement than a broken marriage. My wife and I decided to get married months before our official engagement, which came seven months before our wedding. This was right for our situation. Other people are different. I would be worried, though, if it were less than three months. (Especially if the couple met only recently.)

To directly answer your question, though, no. Marriage is better.

-The Franchise
A: Dear Faint Canaries,

It's like waiting for a Harry Potter book to come out. You have fun, discussing all of the possible plot lines and who might die, and discounting supposed "leaks" that make no sense (how many times can they say Dumbledore will die in the next book?!), and the anticipation is wonderful, but reading the book itself is soooo much better.

~Moaning Myrtle
Question #5826 posted on 05/24/2004 12:03 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,
How much does each hour of tuition cost? Also how long at BYU would a penny pay for? BYU-I?
- a penny saved...

A: Dear penny pincher,

Now when you say hour, I'm not quite sure what you mean, so I'm going to interpret it as every hour spent in class. The assumption here is that one credit hour is equivalent to about 50 minutes a week in class, which totals about 11 hours and 40 minutes over the course of a 14-week semester. This number is a little subjective because 1 credit hour doesn't always mean 1 50-minute class period (labs, PE classes, etc. mess things up a bit). And even the 14 weeks isn't hard and fast because holidays push Fridays to Tuesdays at Thanksgiving time and as much as the University tries to compensate for days off, some classes will inevitably come up short. Still, I think for the sake of this argument the 11:40 is a good estimate.

Further complicating the matter is that not everyone at BYU and BYU-I has the exact same tuition and schedule. Part timers pay per credit hour, but full and 3/4-timers pay a flate rate. As a full timer, you're payload is roughly equivalent to that of a part-timer (at BYU-Idaho at least) if you're taking the minimum credit load to stay full time. But if you milk the system for all it's worth by loading up on 18 credit hours, you're going to get a much better deal.

Also, there is the LDS/non-LDS issue - I've made separate tables to organize the data for each subgroup since you pay more if you're not a regular tithing contributor.

And there are graduate students, as well. Graduate students can register for pretty much as many credit hours as they want, so I can't set an 18-credit ceiling like I can for undergrads. Based on the coursework of several graduate student friends, I decided 9 credits was pretty standard and did the full-time calculations for that number. But it turns out that the dollars per hour for nine credits are exactly the same as the dollars per hour for part time. Therefore, you'll notice that the graduate student table is a lot simpler than the other tables, with columns for LDS and non-LDS students only (no full-time/part-time differentiation).

You asked for the tuition per hour, but since we generally spend our time in 50-minute classes, I thought it would also be interesting to throw in the numbers for tuition per 50-minute class period just to see how much money you're spending every time you sit through your American Heritage lecture. I also added the tuition and hours spent in class per semester to the table so you knew where my calculations came from (you can even check them if you want). I apologize if there are a few slight calculation errors - I did a lot of number-crunching on my calculator, and then had to transfer the numbers from my notecards to this post, but I think it's all pretty accurate.

So after that lengthy intro, here's the data. Enjoy!

BYU Undergraduate Students (LDS)

Full Time
(18 cr. hrs.)
Full Time
(12 cr. hrs.)
3/4 Time
(11.5 cr. hrs.)
3/4 Time
(9 cr. hrs.)
Part Time
Tuition$1640$1640$1570$1570$168
per cr. hr.
# Hours Spent in Class210140134:1010511:40
$$ Per Hour$7.81$11.71$11.70$14.95$14.40
$$ Per 50-Minute Class Period$6.51$9.76$9.75$12.46$12.00
Time Paid for by One Penny4.61 s3.07 s3.08 s2.41 s2.5 s


BYU Undergraduate Students (non-LDS)

Full Time
(18 cr. hrs.)
Full Time
(12 cr. hrs.)
3/4 Time
(11.5 cr. hrs.)
3/4 Time
(9 cr. hrs.)
Part Time
Tuition$2460$2460$2335$2335$252
per cr. hr.
# Hours Spent in Class210140134:1010511:40
$$ Per Hour$11.71$17.57$17.40$22.24$21.60
$$ Per 50-Minute Class Period$9.76$14.64$14.50$18.53$18.00
Time Paid for by One Penny3.07 s2.05 s2.07 s1.62 s1.67 s



BYU Graduate Students

LDSNon-LDS
Tuition$230 per cr. hr.$345 per cr. hr.
# Hours Spent in Class11:4011:40
$$ Per Hour$19.71$29.57
$$ Per 50-Minute Class Period$16.43$24.64
Time Paid for by One Penny1.83 s1.22 s



BYU Idaho Students (LDS)

Full Time
(18 cr. hrs.)
Full Time
(12 cr. hrs.)
Part Time
Tuition$1320$1320$110 per cr. hr.
# Hours Spent in Class21014011:40
$$ Per Hour$6.29$9.43$9.43
$$ Per 50-Minute Class Period$5.24$7.86$7.86
Time Paid for by One Penny5.72 s3.82 s3.82 s



BYU Idaho Students (non-LDS)

Full Time
(18 cr. hrs.)
Full Time
(12 cr. hrs.)
Part Time
Tuition$1980$1980$165 per cr. hr.
# Hours Spent in Class21014011:40
$$ Per Hour$9.43$14.14$14.14
$$ Per 50-Minute Class Period$7.86$11.79$11.79
Time Paid for by One Penny3.82 s2.55 s2.55 s


-Leibniz
Question #5823 posted on 05/24/2004 12:03 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,
In 5th grade, Tim Delaney the obnoxious braggart told me that scars migrate up your body. For instance, if you skin your elbow and it forms scar tissue, this tissue patch will slowly move up your arm towards your shoulder and possibly migrate to the top of your head in 1000 or so years.

1) is this even remotely true?
2) where is that Tim Delaney fool now?

- Yeshua Yick

A: Dear Yeshua Yick,
1) Yes. Very remotely, in that scars do migrate. But no, they won't end up on the top of your head.
2) He's got a nice house in Beverly Hills and is living the sweet life (in between gigs with Disney):
Bio - Tim Delaney - 2001
Tim joined Walt Disney Imagineering in 1976 as a designer for the Starcade in Tomorrowland at Disneyland Park. He spent the next five years designing and show producing The Living Seas, at EPCOT in 1986. In December of 1989, Tim was promoted from Show Producer to Executive Designer for Discoveryland at Disneyland Paris. He was responsible for the overall design and show content of this dazzling, futuristic world celebrating human imagination, ingenuity and invention. Tim is currently designing and producing several new attractions for the Disneyland Resort.

Quite the busy little bee. He obviously got over his thing with deceiving little girls too, but part of that was because he had a HUGE crush on you, so you really ought to cut him some slack.

::: Latro :::
Question #5822 posted on 05/24/2004 12:03 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,
How many engineers does it take to fix the sickly bells in the Clyde building? How late do the bells run, because I've heard something like a bell going off at midnight. Also, during winter the hallway lights were on on Saturday, but now they are off. Why is that?

For the Grammar Queens, how do you deal with a sentance like my second one that is a question but feels awkward with a question mark?
- Inquisitive Clyde Captive

A: Dear Captive-

More engineers than are currently assigned to the task. At all hours. During Fall and Winter, more people are in the building, even on Saturdays. Use a question mark for a question.

-The Franchise
Question #5821 posted on 05/24/2004 12:02 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,
How many people get injured or die in their showers at home every year?
- Lady Godiva

A: Dear Lady Godiva,

The most extensive, full-scale study on the number of bathtub/shower incidents was done by the Consumer Product Safety Commission way back in 1975. That particular study reported that there are over 110,000 shower-related injuries and deaths per year. Despite the age of the study, I think some of the findings are still relevant. For instance:
  • Bathtubs are more dangerous than showers.
  • Slips and falls account for the majority of incidents.
  • Burns from hot water are less frequent than slipping incidents, but tend to be more severe (there were over 200 reported deaths from burns).
  • Fixture breakages are not a significant source of injury.
  • Children under 10 are most likely to suffer bathtub/shower injuries - they make up only 20% of the population but represented 45% of injuries and deaths.
  • The elderly are not disproportionately represented in the percentages (contrary to popular belief), but their injuries tend to be more severe.
Following this study, a number or recommendations for increasing shower safety were put forth. However, later statistics suggest that the number of injuries has increased, rather than decreased. The highest number (from a reliable source) that I found was 139,434 in 1991. One website even cited the number 200,000, but I don't believe them because they didn't give their source and they were advertising slip-resistant bathtub mats.

Since I'm assuming this question was sparked by the roller coaster response, I'll just add that, by comparison, there were only 12 documented roller coaster fatalities between 1987 and 1999.

-Leibniz
Question #5820 posted on 05/24/2004 12:02 a.m.
Q:

Dear The Franchise,
How did you get to read the Ender's Game screen play? Could you tell me how I could get a copy?
- Lady Godiva

A: Dear Lady Godiva-

I read it about a year ago off the Fresco Pictures website. (Unsurprisingly, at www.frescopictures.com) However, I'm checking the site again right now, but not finding it. Now, I'm checking hatrack, OSC's main site, but it doesn't seem to be here, either. Sorry about that.

-The Franchise

p.s. If anyone else comes across it, I'm sure there are plenty of interested people.
A: Dear Lady Godiva:

Many years ago, OSC released to the Fresco Pictures website the first 50 or so pages of an early (1996?) draft of the Ender's Game screenplay that he had written. There were a lot of strong reactions to this draft (quite a bit of it negative), so OSC pulled it after it was released and it is now no longer generally available.

Since then, he's rewritten an entirely new draft (actually several of them, but finished in late 2003) that includes elements of both Ender's Game and Ender's Shadow, and hired on Michael Dougherty and Dan Harris (scriptwriters for X-Men 2) in Feb 2004 to help with the second draft. So the movie's slated for 2005, and may well just make it.

-- Misaneroth
Question #5818 posted on 05/24/2004 12:02 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What would a meal for two at the Chef's Table cost? I've been told it's extremely nice, but expensive, and I always see it when I'm driving back from Orem. Oddly, no one ever tells me just how expensive it was though.

- What's the latin for "I'm married, therefore, I'm poor'?

A: Dear Poor,
A friend of mine says it's about twenty bucks for entrees, which come with bread and salad. She recommends the salmon or the beef tenderloins with the mango sauce. I, however, recommend the 3-for-a-dollar taco night at Del Taco for all the poor people out there.

-Benvolio
Question #5817 posted on 05/24/2004 12:02 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What's going to be the most exciting, extraordinary, amazing movie of 2006 and why:

The Bad News Bears, Carmen Sandiego, Ender's Game, Indiana Jones 4, Pirates of the Caribbean 2, Superman, an unnamed Star Trek prequel, War of the Worlds, The X-Files 2, or X-Men 3?

- Liningson

A: Dear Liningson:

Okay, this isn't as hard as you think. First off, every movie listed here is either a remake or a sequel, except Ender's Game and Carmen Sandiego. There's no information on the latter except that it's been announced, so I'm not going to make any predictions on it. As for the former, if Wolfgang Petersen stays on as director and OSC stays on as writer, I think we'll get a very good movie out of it. Not anything sublimely unconventional and mind-blowing (like the first Matrix), but just a good, solid show. Personally, I think the best way to do EG would be computer animation à la Titan: AE or Final Fantasy, but doesn't look like that's going to happen at this stage.

Anyway, on to the rest:

- Bad News Bears: no opinion, though comedy remakes don't fare too well
- Indy 4: Raiders and Holy Grail were fun movies, but not spectacular. As long as Lucas has a significant hand in writing the dialog, it's going to be cheesy at best. Hopefully this series doesn't suffer from an even/odd problem (more on that later), because that would put Indy 4 down around the quality of Temple, which is a hallmark of terrible cinema.
- Pirates 2: given the past history of Jerry Bruckheimer, when he makes a sequel to a successful movie, the sequel is pretty far over the top (eg, Bad Boys vs Bad Boys II). Gore Verbinski's an okay director, and at least most of the same cast is coming back. But I don't have really high hopes for this one. It will probably be good, but not extraordinary.
- Superman: Another remake-of-a-movie-from-the-1970's. The worst they could do is a straight, faithful remake; for a good analysis of why the Superman myth is out of place in our current society, look at this article in last week's Time: http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1101040517-634695,00.html . So the only way to save this one would be to do a major reworking, which could be either very good, or very bad. Until we know who's writing and directing it, I'm not making any more predictions.
- Star Trek: The only things worse than even-numbered Treks are odd-numbered Treks. This is number 11.
- War of the Worlds: Cruise and Spielberg made a great combination in Minority Report. This one definitely has the potential to be as good.
- X-Files 2: Sorry, but the series jumped the shark a long time ago. I really can't see the necessary Anderson/Duchovny chemistry coming back, so I don't really think this movie's going to make it. As The Lone Gunmen series pointed out, the alien conspiracy thing is quite passé -- now we've got terrorism to worry about.
- X3: X1 and X2 were both good, entertaining movies, fun for $8 worth of two hours, but not extraordinary. X3 will continue the trend. Seeing Jean Grey transformed into Phoenix should be sweet, and I hope Halle Berry isn't so much of a jerk that she refuses to come back to play Storm.

Predictions for other 2006 movies:

- Bridge to Terabithia: thus far, it's got no-names as a director and writer. But it's being produced by Walden Media, which did Holes, this year's Around the World in 80 Days (released next month and looks pretty good) and next year's The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. So they've got a track record of good book -> movie adaptations.
- Hopefully the Evangelion live-action movie makes it by then. If they do it well, it won't make much money in the US (shades of Final Fantasy). If they do it to make money in the US, then it won't be a good movie.
- Metroid: This one will be tricky. To get the game right, you'd basically have to remake Alien. You would definitely need a good actress to play Samus (no Angelina Jolie or Mila Jovovich, please -- Claire Forlani is rumored, and could do it). It could be done, but I doubt it will be. Think Tomb Raider and Mortal Kombat.
- Girls Next Door</I>: From the same director as ID4, The Patriot and Day After Tomorrow. Probably won't be a memorable one, but will definitely be a box-office player.

So there you have it. Box Office 2006 all lined up.

-- Misaneroth
A: Dear Liningson,

I'll say that I hope the most exciting movie will be Superman. I loved the orignals when I was a child.

I hope that they are able to get Tom Welling from the WB's Smallville to take the role. I think that the most successful way for the movie to flourish is to use as many of the actors from Smallville as possible, while not using characters from the show unless the corresponding actor will be used. By making it a bit of an extension of the show, I think it coulc be very successful (like the original X-Files movie seemed to be).

As for the other movies, I am not sure. I have heard rumors of Spiderman 3 possibly being slated for that year. I think it is not unreasonable to see that movie being one of the top grossing films for that year if that speculation does come to fruition.

I know this question is a bit off topic for me, but I loved the original Superman and wanted to say something in support of it. I have to concede to Misaneroth and the Time article. The reason that Smallville has been successful is perhaps because they made him not quite so perfect.

-Pa Grape
A: Dear Liningson-

To extend Pa Grape's thoughts, if they have some Smallville people and some non-Smallville people as characters that do appear in Smallville, the movie will struggle to create its own identity. Of course, after the season finale, it looks like there aren't that many main characters left to round up, anyway.

To somewhat disagree with Misaneroth, I would really be afraid of a CG Ender's Game. CG films of people have historically been poorly made and poorly received. I don't really know why, but it seems to be a pretty real phenomenon. But I can't believe it wll be ready for an '06 release.

-The Franchise
Question #5816 posted on 05/24/2004 12:02 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,
I introduced my younger brother to the board and now he's hooked. I think I may have cursed you though: he's already asked several stupid questions and is the guy who was writing about his Morrowwind woes. Can you tell him to get off his computer and X-Box and live life a little?

- Afraid I'll never have nephews

A: Dear Afraid-

Yes, we can. Observe:

Dear Afraid's Little Bro-

There's a cute girl you know that is waiting each day for you to talk to her and ask her out. Why are you letting her down? Go talk to her! Morrowwind will still be there an hour or a day or even a week from now. The girl will eventually move on.

-The Franchise.
A: Dear Afraid,

I'll tell him to get off his X-box, but not his computer. Why would I want to do that? I live on my computer. I don't see anything wrong with that. Saves money that I would have spent on girls. They can come play, too, if they really want to see me.

~WhiteElephant
Question #5815 posted on 05/24/2004 12:02 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,
I like drinking water, but not the luke warm stuff that comes out of my tap. In order to get cold water, I buy a bottle, fill it up, and put it in the fridge. I don't like to think that I'm buying the drink just for the bottle, so I don't buy bottled water. Instead I get a bottle with a flavored drink in it. In these bottles, expecially those with fruit drinks, there remains a taste which turns the water stored in them into something undesirable. Even after rinsing them many times and putting them through the dishwasher, they still have the added flavor. Is there any way to rid my bottles of their flavor?
- GreenSpam

A: Dear GreenSpam,

Two options:

1. Buy one bottle of bottled water. Reuse the bottle. Save money on buying drinks.

2. Get a Brita water filter. One of my roommates has one and it's wonderful. The only water I'll drink, generally, is the cold filtered stuff from the fridge. We are SO registering for one of those.

- FCSM
A: Dear Green Spam,

Personally, I have to drink my water lukewarm - I don't like it cold unless it's really hot outside, and even then I'll usually drink it at room temperature. But if I did like cold water, I'd go with FCSM's suggestions. Bottled water isn't all that expensive if you're reusing the bottle, and it tastes so much better than Provo water that I don't have any qualms about buying it every once in awhile.

Still, your question made me think of an incident in my apartment a couple days ago. I was sitting on the couch reading a book and heard my roommate turn the water on over in the kitchen. I took no notice, until she wandered into the room and sat down nonchalantly on the piano bench - with the water still going full blast. So I asked her if she had the water on for a reason, or if she just wanted to get a reaction out of me (you have to understand that I have this sort of bantering relationship with her that I don't have with anyone else - my comment may have sounded rude to someone standing in the room, but it was actually a completely normal, unoffensive conversation starter).

Anyway, it turns out she did have a purpose (although I think she was still hoping for a reaction). She explained that Powerade tends to flavor the bottle and she was just trying to eliminate the flavor by gushing it with hot water. She ran the water for several minutes and then removed the bottle, filled it with tap water, and stuck it in the fridge.

So I kind of forgot about the incident until I saw your question this morning. When I got home from campus, I asked my roommate if her attempts to remove the flavor had worked, and she said yes. So there you have it - let hot water run into your bottle continuously for about three or four minutes and that should probably do the trick. Not the ideal method if you're at all concerned about water conservation. But I guess you could shorten your morning shower or something and ease your conscience.

-Leibniz
A: Dear GreenSpam,

Add a a few drops of chlorox bleach to the bottle. Fill the rest of the bottle with water and shake with all your might. Let the bottle sit for about three hours. Then empty the bottle and stick it in the dishwasher. When it comes out it should have the majority of the taste gone.

The Captain
Question #5813 posted on 05/24/2004 12:02 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I have a very perplexing quandry on my hands. Due to my rediculous name i cannot pick up chicks(where can u go wrong with a name like NAMELESSWONDER?). I would appreciate some advise as to what i should do. Oh 100 hour Board, Where would I be without your satirical advice?

- NAMELESSWONDER

A: Dear NAMELESSWONDER,

Pick something cool, like Beemer Boy. Chicks dig guys with nice cars.

- Beemer Boy
A: Dear _____,

Trust me, names have nothing to do with being ablt to pick up chicks. Yup, nothing.

You know what I think your problem is? It's one of two things. Either you're picking chicks that are too fast or too fat.

I always found that the biggest challenge in picking up chicks was catching them. After that, it was just the lifting, and the girls I chose were pretty easy to pick up. If you keep trying to pick up fat girls, you'll either eventually get strong enough from trying to lift them, or you'll get a hernia.

So, my advice: ignore the name and hit the gym. Some weights and the treadmill should fix the problem.

-CGNU Grad, who found that the second biggest problem was keeping the chicks from clawing his face off when he finally put them down.
Question #5812 posted on 05/24/2004 12:02 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

We keep getting these calls at my house where you pick up and hear a little double click thing, and then a dial tone. I answer at least three of these calls a day, and it gets pretty irritating. I've heard about people being called by automated machines and such on accident, but these calls come at odd times, like 4:22, and I've always heard of such machines calling regularly at regular times. My uncle thinks someone might be watching the house, and while I concede that may be an option, it's been happening for a couple of weeks now, and it seems to me they should've given up before now. What do you suppose it is? Any suggestions of anything we can do to get it to stop, whatever it is?

Thanks,

Forelithe

A: Dear Forelithe,

That sounds like what was happening when these crazy people tapped my phone because they thought I was selling drugs. Nevermind the fact that they had no permission and were not associated with the law in any way. They were just nuts. That probably didn't help much, but you might want to see if your lines are tapped.

The Captain
A: Dear Forelithe,

I think telemarketers sometimes have machines call at different times of day to see if people pick up, and then later they call at the time you're most likely to pick up.

- FCSM
A: Dear Forelithe,

Next time it happens, squeal like a pig very loudly. I know I'd think twice about calling you back.

- Mighty Quinn
Question #5809 posted on 05/24/2004 12:02 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What's up with BYU's web-based e-mail? It's horrible! Wretched! I know this question has been asked before, but the answer always seems to be "expect it to be better sometime later." Is better e-mail just one of the many half-done or never completed IT projects on campus? Is it resigned to the same fate as Blackboard 5.5 (endless setbacks)? I know there are no plans to further version 3 (thank goodness, its interface is the worst I've ever seen), when can we expect a version 4?

BYU's IT department seems to be entirely unconcerned with what students want.

- I need better e-mail!

A: Dear You Should Try pop3,

PostOffice Version 5 should be out by fall semester.

-Phoenix
A: Dear needs better e-mail,

Get a job on campus where you get Premium E-mail. Then they come set up Microsoft Outlook and you get the nifty webmail feature.

- FCSM, who now has Premium E-mail
A: Dear Better,

Premium is top stuff. Can't knock it. I can't stand the old Route Y email. Your other option is to use Outlook and have it pull from and send through your BYU account.

-CGNU Grad
Question #5808 posted on 05/24/2004 12:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

So, I don't go to BYU and I'm not even LDS (this will soon become obvious)--can I still ask a question? My question is: I understand the function of temples in terms of baptisms, marriages, and endowments (well, as much as I can, not being LDS and thus never having been to a temple)--but sometimes I hear people (RMs just back from a mission, let's say) saying "Oh, I went to the temple the other day." If they aren't doing baptisms or getting married, and they've already got their endowments, then what are they doing there? Once you're endowed, can you just go through whenever the spirit moves you to do so, and if so, what do you do? Is there a specific set of activities that you can go through whenever you want, or do you just hang out there (sorry to be flippant--I know it's more important than that, but you know what I mean), or is there something big that I'm missing? The internet is not very helpful about this.
Thanks!
- Friendly and Genuinely Curious

A: Hello Genuinely Friendly and Curious, if someone has to be baptized to enter the kingdom of God, hence us doing baptisms for the dead, and someone has to be endowed to enter the kingdom of God, then it would only logically follow that there are endowments for the dead, as well. So, the session is done again, this time for someone who has passed on. You can do it whenever you like. The specific set of activities (endowment session) is the same every time, and they have sessions every x minutes. In Utah, it's every 20 minutes. In some less populous places, it's every hour. After the session which is always about 90 minutes, a person goes into the celestial room (pictures of these can be found in the "Temples" magazine, and elsewhere), where there are couches and chairs, etc., and at that point a person can meditate and pray as long as they like, then leave whenever they like.

Your question was not very offensive, in my opinion.

-Toasteroven
A: Dear Friendly and Genuinely Curious-

The answer above covered your question rather well. I just wanted to mention that those that have died--the ones that baptisms or endowments are being performed for--are not compelled to accept them. The LDS church does not believe in forced conversions. At present, we don't know which deceased persons wish to become members of the church, so ordinances are performed for them. It is then their decision to accept or reject it.

-The Franchise
A: Dear Friendly and Genuinely Curious,

I suggest, if the opportunity presents itself, that you attend a temple open house. Several of my non-member relatives attended an open house for a temple that was opening in the area. My parents invited them solely in hopes that it would help them understand our religion better (they were devout catholics and Jehovah's Witness) We were shocked that the latter attended. It was a great experience and they were all amazed at the beauty of the building.

I suggest, if a temple is offering an open house anywhere near you, that you make an effort to attend. I think it will help you understand much more.

-Pa Grape
Question #5807 posted on 05/24/2004 12:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,
There was a question once where it talked about how with different water temperatures ( when taking a shower), the pores on your body will open or close. But I don't think it was ever specified which temperature does which. And would this be useful to help get acne under control in any way?
- zits suck

A: Dear zits suck,

Warm water opens pores and cold water closes them.

Lots of websites about acne treatment recommend washing your face with warm water to help open and cleanse the pores. You can also steam your face a few times a week by pouring hot water into a large bowl and then leaning over it with a towel over your head. Once the steam is gone, rinse your face with cold water.

-The Grad Student
Question #5806 posted on 05/24/2004 12:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

With the advent of the new Hershey's Kisses with Caramel, i've started wondering how they manufacture the different incarnations of Kisses--i.e. Hershey's Hugs, Almond Kisses, Caramel Kisses. The original Hershey's Kiss was simple to manufacture; what process do they use for each variation?

- the surface on the Caramel kind is much smoother than a regular Kiss

A: Dear tsotckimstark,

Plain Hershey's Kisses are made by dropping chocolate from small nozzles onto a continously moving belt, which subsequently moves to cooler to set the chocolate. The newer versions of kisses are actually made using a completely different process, however. The process is the same one used to make Rolos, Reese's peanut butter cups, and other varieties of filled chocolates. Chocolate is poured into a mold which is then inverted so that the inside of the mold is coated with a layer of chocolate. The almond or the caramel is placed inside the mold, and then the mold is once again filled with chocolate. In the case of hugs, the mold is first filled with white chocolate and then a mini-kiss is placed inside the mold.

Maybe the difference in surface textures is due to the differences in production processes.

-Leibniz
Question #5805 posted on 05/24/2004 12:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I just saw the movie "John Q." It made HMO's and the medical system seem very corrupt. Is it really like that? Do doctors really get payed off to ignore problems people have just because their insurance doesn't want to pay for it?

- (unquestioned answers)

A: Dear (unquestioned answers)-

The American health care system is pretty good. Having said that, some people get treated much more effectively than others. Certain HMOs give bonuses to doctors that see many of their patients but have a low average cost and put pressure on hospitals to discourage doctors that prescribe expensive treatments. It's hard, though, to see how prevalent problems are, but it will inevitably exist in health care.

The problem is that perverse incentives exist. HMOs benefit if medical care given to those under their coverage is minimal. Ideally, the money they receive would depend on the health levels of their enrollees, so that their objective would be the same as any patents under their coverage.

I can't figure out a way to make that work. If anyone can, they can be elected president. Or at least have another candidate steal their idea.

-The Franchise (who got shafted by his health insurer or medical provider thrice in the last two years)
Question #5804 posted on 05/24/2004 12:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Many times when there is a tragedy around the world, the death toll varies tremendously. I have read a lot of articles in which the US reported count is much lower than the foreign one. So, two questions:
1. How can there be that much of a discrepancy? Counting dead bodies seems pretty definite to me, especially in an incident not involving an explosion. Gunfire on a protest, for instance.
2. Who do you think is more reliable? I would tend to believe the US reports (probably because I am an american) but it seems like the foreign officials would have better first hand access to information like that.

- crumpet

A: Dear Crumpet,

I vote for the BBC. They have built up a reputation over the years for providing accurate, unbiased information. In fact, Hilter executed people for listening to the BBC and telling other what they heard. He wasn't a big fan of the truth.

~MinuteMaid
Question #5801 posted on 05/24/2004 12:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I noticed that on Tuesday there were only four questions answered, which seemed kind of low. Does that have anything to do with fewer questions being asked or are you guys just busy? Thanks.

- The Boy Wonder, who asked this question because of low answers

A: Dear The Boy Wonder,
The number of questions answered depends on the number of questions asked and when they were asked. Since only four questions posted on Wednesday (5/19 is a Wednesday) that means only four questions were submitted in the time that would allow them to post today. Questions post when they reach 70-something to 99 hours. The only exception is Sunday, where nothing posts, so all the posts that would have posted Sunday are carried over to Monday, making Monday's post extremely lengthy.
- The Queen of Everything
A: Hey Boy Wonder, Check out how long May 10th's is.
Whoo-whee! We have very little control over how much is posted. Unless we want to ask ourselves questions, which is incredibly boring.

-Anon-o-rama
Question #5800 posted on 05/24/2004 12:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

The popular Japanese book, called Shonen Jump,(A collection of many different "manga" (comics) each month) has many readers. I want to know how many people read it to read Naruto, one of the more popular stories. Or how many people in Japan read Naruto at all. Naruto is written by Masashi Kishimoto. Thanks!

- Amanda

A: Dear Mangamanda:

Not being able to read Japanese, the best I've been able to find is that the Naruto graphic novels have sold over 12 million copies as of last year, independent of the Shonen Jump distribution. From what I gather, that's pretty good for a manga series. And in a recent interview in Shonen Jump, Masashi Kishimoto said that about 90% of his fan mail is from girls, which he attributes to the fact that girls are more inclined to write letters than boys are, but it nevertheless interested him that so many girls would be fans of the series.

Did you know that Quark, the BYU Sci-Fi and Fantasy club, has an active Anime/Manga subgroup? The forums are at http://www.quarksff.org/ .

-- Misaneroth
A: デル アマンダ、

わかりません。  大切じゃない。 心配しないでください。

ーー デルべリナー

Question #5799 posted on 05/24/2004 12:01 a.m.
Q:

D1HB,

Yo yo. I'll give you two items, and if you don't mind, please tell me which of the two is better and why. Here we go:

1. July 4th celebrations or the movie Independence Day
2. Escape (The Pina Colada Song) by Rupert Holmes or Two Pina Coladas by Garth Brooks
3. Brian from Family Guy or Brian Fellows from Safari Planet on SNL
4. Friends finale or Frasier finale
5. Bob Kerrey of Nebraska or John Kerry of Massachusetts
6. Star Wars overall weaponry or Star Trek overall weaponry
7. School of Rock or School House Rock

That ought to be enough for now. I can't wait for the responses!

- Abli L.

A: Dear Abli L.-

1. Celebrations. The movie had an interminable plot. Who would pass up some grilling and watchng fireworks? The best was when I attended an LA Galaxy game at the Rose Bowl. Their fireworks show was pretty big-time. Not like the wussy Stadium of Fire show.

2,3. Sorry. No preference.

4. Frasier finale. The Friends one wasn't even funny. But it is close, since Fraser had little closure.

5. Bob Kerrey. He hasn't changed his political ideology in a quest for a higher office.

6. Star Wars. Not that I don't have love for ST:TNG, but (1) the Death Star can blow up a planet, and (2) ST doesn't have fighters. How can you not have fighters?!?

7. School House Rock. No Jack Black, more sweet songs.

-The Franchise
A: Dear Albi,
My preferences go in this order:
Celebrations, neither, Brian Fellows, Frasier, Bob Kerrey, Star Wars, and School House Rock.

My reasons for those choices are the following:
Doing things with people is better than watching a tv, I don't like either song, Tracy Morgan is funny, Frasier is alwasy more clever than Friends, you have to respect a Navy SEAL, turbolaser beat phasers and fighters are more effective, and everyone still remembers that catch (if annoying) song, respectively.

-Benvolio
Question #5798 posted on 05/24/2004 12:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear The Franchise,

I believe your recent response didn't quite address my question, but I don't entirely blame you since I didn't qualify anything. Let me be a little more specific in what I'm asking.

Many people feel that white Christian conservative heterosexual males are the most discriminated against group of people in the United States. So would you or would you not have a problem with an award (whether or not it involves money) produced by a public school where only members of this group are eligible? After all, you don't have much of a problem with publicly funded awards for blacks only (because you believe they generally aren't given opportunities, correct?), so why not an award to satisfy those many people who feel that white Christian conservative heterosexual males are discriminated against and aren't given the opportunities and awards that others are given?

After that last paragraph of mine I had a great discourse on how socioeconomic factors ought to be used in place of skin color factors in order to determine who should be given awards and free money. But I deleted it after realizing that your entire response to my original question was based on support of such change. Still though, I think I'll keep the paragraph before this one because I'm curious as to what you have to say when the fairness argument gets turned around.

Thanks for your time,

And wishing I hadn't wasted so much of mine,

Liningson

P.S. It really was a great discourse.

A: Dear Liningson-

Next time, go ahead and include the discourse. I'm really a fan of giving the most extra help to those that are at the greatest disadvantage. I think Alan Blinder's _Hard Heads, Soft Hearts_ is great at explaning this. The government should minimize income redistribution because it makes the economy less efficient. However, there should be some redistribution to allow the poorest segment of the population similar opportunty to others.

So no, I don't think that is a good idea. I believe white Chrstian conservative heterosexual males still have generally greater opportunity than most, so awards like that would be regressive. However, an award to low-income/low-wealth WCCHMs would be acceptable.

Ideally, though, a combination of socio-economic factors, student achievement and measurable ability for further success would be the best formula, discounting race, sex, sexual preference, religion and political ideology. (And if I read you right, you agree with this conclusion.)

-The Franchise
Question #5797 posted on 05/24/2004 12:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I was reading a book that dealt with the pornography industry and its negative impact. One thing that struck me was that the names of the owners of the porn businesses were almost all Jewish names. Now, the phenomenon of a certain ethnic group owning certain types of businesses is certainly not unheard of (think Indians and the hotel business). My question: How much of the pornograpy/sex industry (surely a multi billion dollar empire ) is controlled by people of Jewish descent?

Leif's Heiress

A: This article is about a book that talks about this subject.

http://www.culturewars.com/2003/rabbidresner.html

I'll have to warn you, it's really long, and a couple of parts have bad language. But the best and cleanest part that I saw in a five minute skim starts with the quote

"Influences like pornography? Suddenly Nina Hartley's description of herself as 'the blonde Jew' porn star from 'a long line of radical Jews,'"

and ends right before the header "I'm God", right before an excerpt from an interview you don't want to read.

And this is one of the most disturbing things I've ever read. http://www.internetfilterreview.com/internet-pornography-statistics.html

This is a little less sensational, and corrects the above oft-quoted stats: http://www.alternet.org/story.html?StoryID=13212

I looked for ages...at least an hour on library and google resources. There aren't stats available on the races and genders of owners, because some of it is illegal (child porn), and a lot of it is simply independent stuff.

Example. You go and get your own site, leifheiress.com, and you do whatever with it. Then, you put up pics and videos. Then, someone can send you money with paypal. It won't be on any table or registered or documented by any sort of government group.

It's incredibly difficult to do a stat like that, and I'm not dissing your question myself, but I don't think anyone cares; the material is all about getting porn or why porn is bad. Incidental facts on it aren't going to get much attention.

Sorry I couldn't find much for you; it is admitted that Jews have a huge influence, as do Italians, in this article about a man who writes books about the industry and about Jewish influence:

http://www.lukeford.net/luke_ford/clips/clips2.html

Luke Ford is a converted Jew who writes about the Jewish influence in the industry a lot, and his comments are fascinating.

And I must interject that this had to be ah...carefully researched.

-Anon-o-rama, who's kind of depressed just from thinking about it abstractly and not explicitly
Question #5796 posted on 05/24/2004 12:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I'm trying to get a federal job that requires a top secret/sci clearance. The problem here is that I suffer from major depression, and while I have been fairly successful at dealing with it on my own, I really don't want to live this way forever. I've avoided any sort of treatment or counseling so far because I understand that any psychiatric history may disqualify me from some intelligence-related positions. Is this accurate? If so, are there any solutions?

- Wiggums

A: Dear Wiggums,

If you're living with major depression, it is far more important for you to get help than to worry about your job. Everybody gets depressed sometimes, even seriously depressed, but clinical depression is different and its consequences are far more serious. It sounds to me like you want to do what you can in order to overcome the illness - please don't let your worries about the job get in the way.

But I understand that your concern is a real one. I've done some research and the information I'm finding from numerous sources is all the same. First, if you're going through evaluation for security clearance, your psychiatric history is going to come up. It's best to be open and honest about everything because you're far more likely to be denied for untrustworthiness than for depression. I think you can be confident that your case will be evaluated fairly, on its own merits. In response to a question about hiding information related to mental illness or emotional troubles, Pete Nelson, deputy director for personnel security for the Office of the Secretary of Defense said, "We rely on medical professionals. If a doctor says the person is not at risk, and is capable of protecting information, there is a good chance it is going to work out fine. For the most part, if the person is willing to work to resolve the issue, the government is willing to work with them."

Also, by Executive Order 12968 (Aug. 4, 1995), you cannot legally be turned down on the sole basis of mental health treatment. If you do have a problem, seeking treatment will likely have a more positive effect on your obtaining security clearance than will trying to cope with it completely on your own because it shows your ability to cope with stressful circumstances and seek help when necessary. For the most part, depression is not a security issue. Depressed individuals are more likely to do nothing for fear of making things worse than to do something that would put security at risk. It is only when depression is tied to other psychiatric disorders and dangerous behaviors (such as those exhibited by extreme manic depressives) that security is a concern.

I'm not saying you're guaranteed that depression won't be an issue. But I think the chances are pretty good that it won't seriously effect your security clearance, and you shouldn't let the worry get in the way of seeking help. Good luck, and do what you can, never forgetting to seek the support of friends, family, and of course your Heavenly Father.

-Leibniz
Question #5795 posted on 05/24/2004 12:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,
what makes those little gold stars the most desirable thing in the world for the first about 8 years of someones life?(fairly sure most musically inclined mormons have heard of the little star stickers)
- Mr. Piddles

A: Dear Mr. Piddles-

They are a tangible sign of acceptance and congratulation from an adult authority. Who wouldn't want that? Besides, stickers are cool.

-The Franchise
A: Dear Mr. Piddles,

It's only for the first eight years? Here I went and gave myself a gold star just the other day. Maybe I just need more sleep. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.... wha? Oh, yeah, gold stars. They are a tangible form of approval, which has become socially accepted as the norm in the younger age groups.

~MinuteMaid
A: Dear Mr. Piddles,
I had gold stars on my FrameMaker certificate. They are cool. I still need two more though. Good thing I have some so I can put them on myself. My boss just didn't get them up. (Giving out gold stars is sort of at the bottom of her to-do list). Unfortunately, I no longer work with FrameMaker, and therefore, I shall retire. Goodbye, dear world.
- The Paragraph Designer
Question #5794 posted on 05/24/2004 midnight
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,
I just noticed a recent question on food coloring, and it brought me back. I used to put food coloring in my contact solution and let my contacts sit in it overnight. Even a few drops would make them dark enough that I couldn't see very well while driving to school, so it probably wasn't a great idea. The color slowly wore off, and would drain into my nose where it dyed my mucus. One day when my eyes were a very dark purple, someone told me that the food coloring would eat away at the proteins in my eyes. My eyes never felt a thing until the night I tried to sleep in them. I have also heard of people who put drops straight into their eyes. So is food coloring harmful to your eyes or not? If yes, what kind of chemical reaction is it? Does non-toxic mean that it can't hurt you (using reasonable amounts of course)?
- Blue Snot

A: Dear Blue Snot,

Yes, food coloring is harmful to your eyes. According to the chair of the American Optometric Association Contact Lens Section, Robert L. Davis, O.D.:

"Food coloring, while safe for consumption, is not necessarily sterile. Using it on contact lenses puts the individual at risk for an eye infection. And remember that certain dyes and tints, depending on what they are derived from, may cause a reaction like red or irritated eyes in some people."

Non-toxic generally means that little or no adverse effects will be caused by ingestion or inhalation of the substance. It's measured by the LD50 (Lethal Dose for 50%) - that is, the amount of the substance needed to kill half the organisms in a test. Substances with oral toxicity of more than 5,000 mg/kg and inhalation toxicity of more than 2,000 mg/l can be labeled non-toxic - basically, you'd have to be exposed to 2-5 times your body weight of the substance to experience harmful side-effects. (Of course, this just refers to the side-effects caused by the toxin. Water is non-toxic, but if you were to drink even half your body weight in water you'd probably kill yourself.)

You can see that the term non-toxic only refers to oral and inhalation toxicity. That means you can ingest food coloring just fine, but it doesn't mean anything when it comes to putting food coloring in your eyes. And what it really comes down to is that your vision is pretty important - you just don't want to mess with your eyes in general.

-Leibniz
A: Dear Blue Snot,

First thing that popped in my head: Why on EARTH would you want to put food coloring in your contact solution anyway?

~Eowyn
Question #5793 posted on 05/24/2004 midnight
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I would like to have the phone (nokia 8910i) that Jack Nicholson used in the movie "Something's Gotta Give". Does the phone really work in the US network as shown in the movie?

-Gio

A: Well cool new band name, It's not available at T-Mobile, Verizon, AT+T, Cricket, Nextel, Sprint, or Cingular in the U.S. So, no.

Incidentally, that phone is really a big pain for people who don't have small fingers, and is way overpriced for its features. It is only nice because of the design and the material. Not practical. It could only be used here at an international rate by someone from another country. You know, $1.50 a minute just doesn't appeal to me for some reason.

-Toasteroven
A: Dear Joe,

I have to agree. Nice looking phone. You sound like me, I am pretty particular about my cell phones. (Gone through four phones and four carriers in the last 3 years.) I suggest you check out http://www.phonescoop.com. The site was a little slow today (Friday) when I checked it, but it lets you compare phones by carriers that offer them, whether they are still available, new models (who is going to carry then and the such), and all sorts of good stuff. Lots of pictures and some reviews too!

-CGNU Grad
Question #5791 posted on 05/24/2004 midnight
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,
Any more funny analogies(Reasons Why English Teachers Die Young...) or something like them? They were hilarious. Thanks!
- Still laughing

A: Dear Still Laughing,
I have to credit my good friend Blave Ferris for that list of analogies. We actually just published a 4-page book of random stuff at work (a non-profit creation), and they were included. However, I don't have anything quite as elaborate anymore, but if anything comes up, or if readers have anything to contribute as well, please pass them our way and we'll post them for the humorous pleasure of everyone.
- Duchess
Question #5802 posted on 05/24/2004 midnight
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

As a recent addition to BYU culture, I've been trying to figure out what the mental pursuasion behind the rush to get married is...obviously hormonal pursuasions can play a big part. So, I guess my question is this: do you think that perhpas the reason that so many people seem to date for like...a week or so...and then become fiances is because we've been told for so long to be "anxiously engaged?" What's the shortest amount of dating time that you've heard of before the couple got engaged? Do those sorts of engagements and marriages usually work out?

Hoping the Board notices the "tongue in cheekness" of the first question,

Ringless in Remote Tennessee ;)

A: Dear Ringless,
Yeah, that's pretty funny yo, "anxiously engaged."
One of the reasons that I think it happens is because, as you might seem to notice--or if you haven't yet, you will soon--it seems that a lot of ecclesiastical leaders remind us, nay, bombard us with the reminder of eternal matrimony. It's in church meeting talks, devotionals, even Daily Universe articles. Yes it's a good thing to be reminded, but good grief, like we didn't get the memo yet, people. I've been at this school for five years and I've heard talks on marriage a bazillion times. Some people fall into the fear of not getting married while at BYU, but really, don't marry the first person who comes along because you are graduating! Ahh, real world! Scary, run away run away!! Some people need to realize that only at BYU do people marry when the girls are 18 or 19 and the guys are 21 or 22. The rest of the world is about 27 or 28. I turn 23 on the 20th of May (that's tomorrow as I write this)--if 27 is the age for me, than that age is fine. In the long scheme of things, 27 isn't that old. I have eternity to be married.
The shortest dating time I've heard was one week. The two people had known each other for years, but the idea of dating never entered their heads. Then, a few years later, one said, hey let's go on a date. And a week later they were engaged. They're both wonderful people and I know that they knew it was right. Actually, she knew that she would marry him after that first date.
The second shortest dating time I know of was at EFY two years ago. While serving as EFY counselors in an undisclosed state (and I'm sure some fellow counselors will know this story), they met, hung out (as much as counselors can during EFY), "dated" all during the first week, and then became engaged two days into the second week. The ten percent rule at its finest. They were married two months later and now go to one of the BYU schools.
- Duchess
A: Hey. When I was at the devotional recently with Earl C. Tingey, I asked my ever famous question, "What percent of the talk do you think will be about marriage?" "Twenty-five," one of the girls said. "Dunno," another mumbled. "Ooh, a third," I said. The second girl who mumbled dunno timed the 45 minute talk and then timed the marriage part...15 minutes. Sorry, had to brag about that. At least he said "I didn't tell you to go get married...just to be prepared to be married." Also interesting was that the DU only used one or two lines to comment on the marriage, the rest was about the first part about records.

One of my best friends met his wife, and then had an event happen where a dream he had at 16 happened exactly as before, and then he knew he would marry her. Four weeks after he met her he said that he had a dream he wanted to tell her about, then spaced continuing to discuss it due to circumstance, and the next day she went to California to visit her family. One week later she got back, still very irritated and anxious due to not having heard about that dream. Then he told her about when she got back, and after he told her the dream (it basically said they'd marry each other), there was this lazy pause. Then he mumbled "So you wanna get married, or what?" Yup, Mr. Romantic. They told me that and I said "Wow, 35 days. Five weeks. Four if not for the trip to California." "Well, her parents were 10 days," my friend told me. "Wow," I said.
"Yeah," he agreed. "I'm slow."

So, I know of two ten-day couples and one five-week couple. All three of those marriages are excellent, and I know there won't be divorces in any of them. The two ten-day ones are middle-aged and have had all their kids and are great. My friend is a guy who would never screw up, and she's great too. Weirder things have happened, I suppose...

-Toasteroven
A: Dear Ringless,
I know a few older couples that supposedly decided to get married in a couple weeks. I don't know whether that was more normal back then or what, but it still seems quick. I suppose if you really know something than there isn't anything to do but to go ahead, but two weeks is very fast. I know a chick who got engaged in two weeks that is younger than me, but I think she's a loony. Two months is about the fastest I've seen a couple take. It would probably take me longer than that to get around to dating a girl.

-Benvolio

A: Dear Ringless,

It wasn't at BYU, but I knew a guy (now middle-aged with 13 kids and happily married) who got off his mission and was married before he gave his homecoming talk.

Granted, they'd dated extensively before his mission, but I still think that one takes the cake.

- Mighty Quinn
A: Dear Ringless-

I'd just lke to take a moment to tell everyone they can slow down! If it's right now, then it will still be right after having know each other for a year. As I'd mentioned a month or so ago, a good friend of mine recently divorced after a quick marriage. A few months more waiting would help people avoid potential sorrow.

Just because you know you will marry a certan person doesn't mean the two of you are ready to be married yet. There are kids in elementary school that know they wll go to BYU, but they shouldn't sign up for Fall Semester just yet.

-The Franchise (My parents got married after knowing each other for a few months, I took two years.)
A: Dear Ringless in Remote Tennessee ;),

I woldn't exactly say I rushed into marriage, but I have always known that I am a better person with a significant other (now a wife) than without. I am not saying that I need to have a significant other in order to feel valid or valuable. I am saying that I love having someone to think about and be mindful of, to do things for and to know is there for me as I am for her. For me, the idea that it is not good for man to be alone, is very true. I would be lost without my wife.

As for the quickest marriage, a friend of mine named Dave served a mission in Guatemala. He left a fiancee behind, but chose to discontinue the relationship before leaving the MTC. He went and served with all his heart. While there, he met a sister missionary, native to Guatemala. They exchanged information, shook hand, and parted ways. Once home from his mission, he began writing her extensively. He flew back down to Guatemala and took her on a date. They were married that weekend.

Now, about 5 or 6 years later, they have two children and he was just released from the Stake Young Men's Presidency to serve as a Branch President.

-Pa Grape
Question #5776 posted on 05/24/2004 midnight
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,
There is this Triumph the Comic Insult Dog on Conan and once he was at the Star Wars 2 line making fun of all the people. Then, Blackfoot the Dragonmaster came and talked to everybody. Who is he and where is he from?
- Funniest thing I've ever seen in my life

A: Dear funniest,
It's Blackwolf the Dragonmaster. Knock yourself out:
http://www.geocities.com/blackbeardian/Magecraft/bwolfmain2.html
::: Latro :::
Question #5737 posted on 05/24/2004 midnight
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What percentage of BYU students (grad or undergrad) go country dancing?

- Cinderella

A: Dear Cinderella-

18%. And 87% of that number are girls.

-Mrs. Franchise
A: Dear Cinderella,
That's 18% that have gone at one time or another.
Those who go occasionally (2-5 times a year): 6%
Those who go frequently (10-15 times/year): 2%
Those who go every weekend and anytime they can find an open place during the week or even if it's not open they'll just break in and go at it and sometimes they just put on country music in their front room and pound on the floor with their goofy-looking wannabe cowboy boots until the neighbors call the cops: you.
Ok, just kidding. I still love you, but I swear if I hear you stomping around upstairs even ONE more time...
::: Latro :::