Dear 100 Hour Board,
This is lame, but how do you make more friends? Lately, my roommate and I have been pursuing these guys who aren't really pursuing back...guess they're not interested. In the meantime, we've realized perhaps we should expand our circle of friends and thus increase our chances of getting asked out, while also having plenty to do when we're not getting asked out. And, by the way, why is it girls seem to be the only ones pursuing and never guys? All the guys we know (including the ones previously mentioned) seem to be surrounded by this constant harem of girls...and we never really meet any guys that aren't (except certified-weirdos). If we don't do anything, they ignore us, b/c they're surrounded by girls...if we make an effort to show interest, it doesn't matter b/c they're surrounded by a huge group of other girls showing interest. So the question is twofold: how do we get guys to like us? How do we make more friends so we don't have to care so much about guys liking us?
I take a little offense at the suggestion that young men don't make any sort of attempt to pursue young women. As a male, I've made all kinds of effort to secure the attention of various young women. Please be careful with sweeping generalizations like that.
Let's address each of your questions seperately, although, to be honest, there's going to be a lot of overlap here.
Q. [H]ow do we get guys to like us?
A. I'm going to make a couple of suggestions here. First of all, you need to occasionally be on your own so that young men can speak to you one on one. As a young man, I can attest that it's a little intimidating to try to speak to a young woman you're interested in when she's surrounded by her cronies. Some young men just aren't interested in dealing with the packs of girls, whether they're intimidated by them or not (i.e., my roommate Robert Poste). Being on your own occasionally will go a long way toward attracting potentially interested young men.
Conversational skills will go a long way toward attracting young men, as well. Just be able to keep a conversation going. Help these young men out. We aren't all brilliant conversationalists. I wish I could tell you how to be a better conversationalist, but as I'm not an especially gifted one myself, I don't have any tips or tricks for you. Alas. I can tell you, though, that being an interesting conversationalist will work wonders for you.
Q. How do we make more friends so we don't have to care so much about guys liking us?
I'm just going to blindly assume that you go to BYU. I'm pretty sure I'm right, based on the way you've worded your question, and also based on the fact that you've submitted it to the BYU 100 Hour Board. You need to attend as many ward functions as you can. Go to everything the activities committee tells you to. Go to FHE like it's your job. Go to ward prayer and talk to everyone. Spend as much time as you can trying to get to know people in your ward. They're going to be the easiest source of friends that you have available.
Try getting involved in clubs and social groups on campus. Think of something you like and join the corresponding club. There are more clubs than you probably think here. Most are affilated with BYUSA - stopping in at their office and asking should prove helpful.
Create your own activities, even. My roommate and I hold barbecues here periodically, and we manage to make tons of friends through those. Organize some sort of activity and host it. It doesn't even have to be big. Invite people over and play games. Supply some sort of food for snacking on. You'll soon find that you have so many friends that you don't know what to do with them.
Write back if you need more.
The best advice I can give is to learn to be genuinely interested in people. You'll find most people really like to talk about themselves and they'll be more inclined to learn about you when you're willing to listen to their stories. Let them know you really care and are interested in what they have to say. I have more friends now than I ever have because I now genuinely love to ask people, "How are you? Tell me about your day," and really listen. Be a friend and you'll find friends.
I think you're on the right track about not wanting to worry about "getting guys to like you." I swear, the minute I finally let go of that was the minute I met Mr. Nike. Why? Because I HAD A LIFE! Because I was involved with other things, and let me tell you, friends, that is intensely atttractive. Someone who waits around and constantly whines about not having someone to date - not attractive. I was also finally willing to let Heavenly Father direct my life instead of me trying to do it (since that really wasn't working out so well). Just be your very best and let the menfolk come on their own. When you are at your best, you can't help attracting others of both genders, and you can't change anyone but yourself. I think you've got a good mindset.
Oh, and you're not lame. You're just willing to ask the question a LOT of people want to ask but are afraid to. Good for you.