"When you get a little older, you'll see how easy it is to become lured by the female of the species." - 1960's Batman TV show
Question #41358 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,
Board Question #41158
I still stand by my answer to Azriel. Bale size is dictated, for the most part, by the bale wagon being used, with the currently popular wagon requiring a 40 inch long bale which weighs approximately 65 to 70 pounds. In rual areas where older equipment is still in use they are not as standard in size and weight. I have seen loosler packed bales that were about 30 inches long and weighed around 35 pounds. I have also seen firmly packed bales that were 50 inches long, I can't quote weight on that becuase I didn't have a scale to stand on when I was out chucking bales of hay off the back of the truck. You also have to take into account how much calories are in each bale of hay.

In a 40 inch bale the calories would be as follow for various types of hay:
Alfalfa 980 kcal/lb
Birdsfoot Trefoil 900 kcal/lb
Red clover 855 kcal/lb
Orchardgrass 820 kcal/lb
Timothy 900 kcal/lb
Brome 980 kcal/lb

The average horse needes about 18,000 kcal per a day to 31,000 kcal. That would be about 38 lbs of Orchardgrass, so if it is a small bale of hay that is around 35 lbs it would be roughly a bale a day. Since I was answering on the phone on my way out of the door I thought my original response to Azriel of "anywhere between one and two bales of hay per day per horse. It also depends on if you're supplementing their diet with anything, because if you are then they won't eat as much hay as they otherwise would." was a nice estimate without going into the boring details about how many calories per type of hay, and the calorie counts of other supplements such as corn, oats, mash, molasses, etc.

But Loves to ride is right that if you are feeding them 50 lbs of hay in the Alfalfa or Brome area that would be overfeeding.

- Janeway

A: Dear Janeaway,

Thanks for the extra clarification.

-Tangerine, wondering how she missed this whole discussion
Question #41356 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Re Board Question #40865

Dear blue blood,

You are special! Josh from Athletic Marketing got back to me, and he made you your very own special pump-up-the-crowd list! Here's his email:

Here are some of the songs we play at the BYU Games. We have special/edited versions of some of the songs so some of them may sound a little different at the games.

Zombie Nation- Kernkraft 400
Pump Up the Jam- Technotronic
Mony Mony- Billy Idol
Good Vibrations- Marky Mark
Remember the Name( Instrumental)- Fort Minor
Move Along- All-American Rejects
Pump It (Instrumental)- Black Eyed Peas
Woo Hoo- Blur
Clocks- Coldplay
Sugar, We're Going Down- Fall Out Boy
Times Like These- Foo Fighters
I'm Ready- Jacks Mannequin
Show Me What You Got (Instrumental)- Jay-Z
Separate Ways- Journey
Is It Any Wonder?- Keane
Rooftops- Lostprophets
Billie Jean-Michael Jackson
The Way You Make Me Feel- Michael Jackson
Everything is Alright- Motion City Soundtrack
Time After Time- Quietdrive
I Was So Alone- The Rocket Summer
Eye of the Tiger- Rocky Soundtrack

We have like 1,000 songs on our music box but these are some of the ones we play the most.


The Cleaning Lady

Question #41338 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

dear 100 board,

in response to (^41310) and (^41160), make sure that if you get a phone off of ebay that is has the sprint logo on it. sprint will only activate phones with that logo on it, so you might be out of luck if you aren't careful.

- bismark

Question #41330 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Regarding Board Question #41160, concerning Sprint cell phone replacement.

Just a bit of background to help the original poster in his quest for a new phone:

Cell networks in the US generally use one of three technologies, which are incompatible with one another: GSM, CDMA, or TDMA. TDMA, which was once in wide use, is now pretty much gone; AT&T, which was the largest carrier once using TDMA, will turn off their TDMA network next year.

Anyway, as was noted, Sprint uses CDMA, as does Verizon Wireless and Alltel. Any phone you pick up would have to be either a phone that was once used on the Sprint network, or a CDMA phone from another network that has been "unlocked."

When you originally buy a phone and plan from a wireless carrier, the carrier binds that phone to their own network -- they do this because they subsidize the cost of the phone when you commit to purchase a contracted amount of service on their network. They also do annoying things -- Verizon inhibits the easy downloading of ring tones, for example. Because of these restrictions, some people find old phones and hack them, removing the network restrictions that once existed, and freeing the phone to be used on any compatible network. They may do this by using a manufacturer's service code, or by reflashing the phone firmware with a non-crippled software load.

GSM is a global standard which internationally is the predominant standard of choice. A GSM phone carries its "personality" on a SIM card, a small card located often behind the battery. When you buy a new GSM phone, the SIM card is swapped to the new phone. As such, any GSM phone continues to have your address book, call timers, etc.

That new GSM phone may or may not be multi-network capable -- it might be limited to one network, just as much as the CDMA phones are, for the same reason. However, it is easier to get an unlocked GSM phone, and because of the SIM card, you can do more with it when you get it. In the United States, the predominant carriers that use GSM are AT&T (Cingular) and T-Mobile.

CDMA and TDMA phones do not use SIM cards.

Internationally, people buy new GSM phones at a higher rate than they do in the United States, changing phones at will. Many people also buy prepaid SIM cards, which can be reloaded with a certain number of minutes. In the United States, however, we have adopted a system where the phones are subsidized by the carriers, who lockyou into a system where you cannot easily purchase a replacement phone without agreeing to a contract extension, except, as noted, by purchasing an "unlocked" phone on eBay or directly from a handset manufacturer or retailer.

If you want to get out of this rat race (not that I did), buy an unlocked phone of your preferred variety, wait until the contract term expires, and then continue to buy unlocked phones. Move them to whatever network you would like, as long as the technology used on the network is compatible. Be aware that in the US, you will pay more for a new unlocked phone.

Of course, if you are an international traveler and on a GSM network in the US, you can always buy a GSM phone in another country, where the price point may be different. Assuming it will support the frequencies used in the US, it could be moved to a US GSM network.

Daryl Gibson

Question #41282 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

In response to Board Question #41126,

I worked at Progrexion for a week. It was a great environment, nice people, but it was all outbound calls. ALL outbound calls. If you don't mind harassing people over the phone for 8 hours a day, the pay is great and a nice play to work at. Just remember, OUTBOUND CALLS

- Inbound

Question #41252 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Christmas around the world inspired me to sign up for Dance 170 next semester. I have never taken a dance class in my life. Will I be in over my head?


A: Dear Inspired,

I think you'll be just fine, and have a great time too. I took Dance 170 my first semester at BYU, when I'd never taken any dance classes before, and now, after having taken many dance classes here, I still maintain that it was one of the easiest, as well as the most enjoyable. In fact, here you can read a review that I wrote near the end of the semester when I was enrolled in the class (Update: Rec. Nights are on Wednesday nights now).

I think the only thing I'd add to that is that if you want a more low-key class, try to get a section taught by a student teacher.


Question #41251 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Besides Sundance, what are the names of any and all other film festivals that take place annually in Utah? I beleve that several are concurrent with Mr. Redford's.

Will you compile that list for me?

Specifically, I need to know which festivals are happening during the next three to five months and in which cities they take place.

Thank you,
Tastes Like Glue

A: Dear Tastes Like Glue,

Here are all of the ones I found, in calendar order:

LDS Film Festival, Orem
Park City Film Music Festival, Park City
Slamdance Film Festival, Park City

Foursite Film Festival, Ogden

Thunderbird Film Festival, Cedar City

Gloria Film Festival, West Valley City

Salt Lake Children's Film Festival, Salt Lake City

In addition, two other Park City film festivals, Freedom Film Festival and Nodance, have been held in past years but are currently on hiatus and not accepting new projects.

- Katya
Question #41250 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Why is the "I'm Board!!" option unavailable to non-registered readers?

(And yes, I registered just to ask you this question?)

- I am Jerome

A: Dear Jerome,

Consider it incentive to log in when you visit the Board. This also allows you to mark and track your favorite questions, as well as check the stats on your favorite writers. And you never know when new features will appear for registered readers...

Question #41249 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What kinds of things would you eat with red pepper jelly?


A: My Dearest Chilly,

Scrambled eggs? An omelet? Personally, I wouldn't let that stuff touch my tongue. Maybe you're just supposed to look at it.

A: Dear Chillylint,

Hm, I haven't really tried it before, but since I'm a fan of spicy things I'd probably try it where I would try normal jelly (or similar sweet sauces such as cranberry sauce): on meat, on a sandwich*, on toast or on English muffins. Azriel's suggestions sound good too. I'd just experiment, I guess, but I don't think it'd be bad with any of the above.

—Laser Jock

*I've made peanut butter and honey sandwiches before using hot pepper-infused honey, and they were quite good. That sweet burn on top of the normal taste of a peanut butter and honey sandwich...mmmm. I may see about making or getting more of that.
A: Dear Chillylint,

I'd make red pepper jelly and cheese sandwiches.

A: Dear Chillylint,

Stir some of that good stuff into a stir fry or rice. That would rock.

A: Dear,

I'd try it on a toasted bagel. Maybe with cream cheese, as well, to counteract the spiciness.

-Uffish Thought
A: Dear chilli,

Yeah, my friend's dad makes that stuff for toast and cream cheese.

Question #41248 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I have almost limitless amounts of time at work and access to only byu.edu websites. That being said, I spend a lot of time on the board.

Why do you not have a "Random Question" link in your sidebar, or a "Random Day" link on your archive page? Wikipedia has this feature, as do many web comics, and both provide their readers with an way to easily access random caches of information.

I would much rather be surprised by learning something new and unexpected than have to arbitrarily flounder around in the archives like a suffocating fish.

- I am Jerome

A: Dear,

We've got one. It's over on the right hand bar, and it says "I'm Board!!"

Judging by your second question, you've already figured this out.

-Uffish Thought
Question #41247 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

All I want for Christmas is a blender that won't overheat when I make a lot of milkshakes in it. Is there any blender that is made specifically for blending ice cream? All the blenders I look at and hear about always show off their fruit, ice, or even soup-blending abilities. The most I ever see about milkshake-making ability is in a written list among a bunch of other things it can do. What are some models of really good milkshake blenders (that aren't the super-expensive "will it blend" blenders)?

- The Modest One

A: Dear Covered Up,

I can totally sympathize with your implied past milkshake-attempting experiences. My old roommate and I still reference the over-the-top soap opera we made up one night, "As the Blender Burns." The whole thing was inspired by our attempt at making a strawberry-banana-chocolate-chip-with-vanilla-ice-cream-base smoothie. Our apartment reeked of over-heated machinery for ages.

Anyhow, the Oster company has a nice range of milkshake-friendly products, from full machines to special blades for regular blenders. There are some other brands and options as well - Google "milkshake machine" for further information.

A: Dear Modest,

As someone who's seen a Blendtec blender do marbles in person, I still want to vote for a Blendtec. Even though I can't afford one, either.


Dear 100 Hour Board,

I was talking with my sister who is currently a graduate nursing student at the University of Utah. She told me for one of her classes, she has to watch and write a report on one of three movies. However, they are all R-rated. The professor refuses to let students watch alternate movies or do any other replacement assignment. They have to watch one of the given movies. The professor is also the dean of the program, so my sister can't really confront a higher authority (and this is UofU we're talking about). Even if there are edited versions or other ways she could get around it (like reading the script online or reading reviews on the movie), is there some way she could get out of this? She wasn't asking me for help and I'm sure she will figure something out, but I was just curious if there are any rules or laws about this. It seems wrong to "force" people to go against their standards.

- xc

A: Dear Concerned Sister,

I called the University of Utah and asked to speak to someone about their policies. After being transfered a good few times and being interrogated about exactly who I was working for, I was finally able to get an answer!

The girl I spoke with at the University of Utah informed me that professors are required to provide alternatives for students in such cases as your sister's as stated in the Students Accommodation Policy. So what your sister needs to do would be to schedule an appointment with someone about "student advocacy" and talk to them about the issue. Apparently the person to contact would be:

-Lori McDonald at: 801-581-8061
(You can schedule an appointment through her secretary of course!)

They can even do it confidentially by trying to discretely remind the professors about the Student Accommodation Policy. Good for you for sticking up for what you believe!

Question #41245 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I want to be a writer, I want to be a writer, I want to be a writer, for Christmas this year. Oh, board writers turn me into wa-one of you.

Okay, that was my little song. Question is: What is the application procedure and what do I do?

- Will my wish come true?

A: Dear Ernie,

Search the archives where all will be revealed.

A: Dear will my wish come true?,

At this rate, no, it will not.

Question #41243 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I am a BYU student. I have heard of a group of students that are drinking and smoking while here at BYU. I also know that some of them constantly cheat for tests and assignments. The only thing is that this is only stuff that I have heard. One of my friends is friends with them and he brought it up once. Also one of those guys who is doing wrong stuff said to be once before I was going to take a test, "Don't worry. If you take a cheat sheet in like me, you'll me fine. Best of luck and cheat a lot." ?!?!?

They are not members of the Church and they just think that the honor code is silly. It is a bad influence for a lot of people and I don't think it should be happening.

What should I do, if anything? What would you do?

- or should I just mind my own business?

A: Dear Reader,

If you don't have direct knowledge of the situation, I'd say don't turn them in. Even if you do (arguably) have direct knowledge of the cheating, it's more appropriate to go to his professor before you go to the Honor Code.

The thing about the Honor Code Office is that's it's a powerful but imprecise weapon (see Board Question #16513) and not one to be used lightly. If these students genuinely are behaving in these ways, their behavior will catch up with them eventually. For now, hold your ground, and let them (and everyone) know what your standards are and that you expect other BYU students to live up to those same standards. You're right that bad behavior can negatively influence other people, but your good behavior can be a positive influence, too.

- Katya
Question #41241 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I just heard the Dell "Deck The Halls" commercial and maybe it's just the style of hymn-as-rock-music, but it sounds a little to me like one of the groups from the Singles Ward or RM soundtracks (which group I couldn't say for sure, as it's been a while since I've seen these movies and I don't own the soundtracks). Is this by any chance actually the case?

- Friendly Non-Mo

A: Dear amiable,

Having not seen this commercial, I can't be 100% certain about this, but I think it might be Reliant K (you can listen to a sample from this page or directly from this link (Real Player)).

The Singles Ward soundtrack was performed by several bands, as was the RM soundtrack, none of which are Reliant K. I do agree, though, the style is very similar.

-=Optimus Prime=-
Question #41240 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I have two rings that I always wear and they usually fit really well. All of a sudden though, maybe within the last week, they are both way to big. I move my hand and they fall off. Why have my hands shrunk? or have the rings expanded?

- Alice in wonderland?

A: Dear Alice,

My fingers always shrink when the weather gets cold. I bet that's what's happened to you.

A: Dear Alice-

Obviously, you drank the wrong potion.

No, this happens to me as well, but I just have all kinds of problems with rings. I also have "giant-knuckle syndrome," which means that any ring big enough to fit over my middle joint is too loose on the base of my finger, and any ring that would fit the base of my finger can never get there. One of the many challenges marriage will one day bring, to be sure.

It's not the rings; if anything, being made of metal, they would shrink from the cold, not expand. "When applied to the extremities, [cold] makes the arteries contract, [and] the fingers shrink and become pale" (Brunton, 51). So your fingers, are, indeed, getting smaller during the cold.

Similarly, it's dry here in Utah, especially during the cold months. Your skin normally sweats and produces oil, which tends to make your rings stick to you, but this effect is lessened in the cold. I could always spin my normally-tight watch (back when I wore one) completely around my wrist once it started getting chilly.

I'm not sure what you should do to fix this. Try gloves. Use lotion to keep your hands hydrated. Just make sure you don't start gesturing emphatically while in conversation with a friend and accidentally send flying a small metallic Cylinder of Death towards some innocent bystander on campus. That's generally frowned upon.


Works Cited:
Brunton, Thomas Lauder (1908). Therapeutics of the Circulation. Philadelphia: P. Blakiston's Son & Co. http://books.google.com/books?id=2Dq8ZZPOkuYC&printsec=titlepage#PPA51,M1
Question #41238 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear the Board of 100 loooong hours,

Do any of you know what Johnathan Taylor Thomas is up to these days? I could really use me some JTT right now.

An address where I could stal-- um, *find* him would be fabulous. And on a completely *unrelated* note... any idea where i could get some really good binoculars...?


A: Dear Arizonan:

According to IMDb, Jonathan Taylor Thomas announced this past September that he was engaged to a model named Natalie Wright. I wouldn't mess with a setup like that, Soupy. Get within 50 yards of him, and you'll find yourself gouged with a four-inch stiletto.

As to his address, his email is thomas.jonathan.taylor@gmail.com * (SEE DISCLAIMER!)

As far as binoculars, these look as good as any.


*This is NOT Jonathan Taylor Thomas' real email address. I, Portia, the female non-celebrity Board writer, set it up and have access to it. If you email it thinking you will reach JTT, I will have a good laugh and might even post your letter in any forum I deem appropriate. You have been duly warned! Thank you, Eric Snider, for the idea.
Question #41236 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Awkward question. Be prepared.

How do I get over my fear of using public restrooms? Rationale doesn't seem to be working. It's bad enough to the point where I can't... perform...

-Phobically Embarrassed

A: Dear Ernie,

Don't try. Just give into your fear. Seriously. Didn't I mention how many germs there are in public restrooms?

A: Dear Phobic,

I wish I knew...

Someone...help us.

-Similarly Ashamed
A: Hey phobic,

Wait long enough, and you go anywhere.

Don't cross me.

Double White Lines
A: Dear PE,

Get pregnant. It will completely destroy any shred of squeamishness you may have with regard to your body and bodily functions.

If getting pregnant's not practical, here's my other advice:

Equip yourself. Get a small container of antibacterial soap to carry in your backpack or purse, along with a small container of wet wipes, and perhaps a hand towel. Keep them in a ziplock baggie.

Then take small steps. Proceed to the next step only after you can comfortably do the previous one.

1) Walk in to a public bathroom. Check your hair in the mirror. Then walk out again.

2) Go into a public bathroom to wash your hands. This is where your supply kit will come in handy. You can use a wet wipe to turn the faucets on and off, and use your hand towel to dry your hands. Use your own hand soap.

3) Go into a bathroom stall just to adjust your clothes. Any small adjustment will do - if you need an excuse, simply unbutton one button, then rebutton it.

4) Go to a bathroom stall to use the facilities. Remember, you've got your supply kit to use as needed.

Good luck to you!

The Cleaning Lady
A: Dear Embarrassed,

Everyone so far makes it sound like you're scared of the germs. If that's the case, they've given some good advice.

But is it the germs? Or is it something...deeper?

Are you afraid of people hearing you? Because if that's the case, you should just realize (it's hard, yes, but you can convince yourself) that that's exactly what they're expecting to hear.

Are you afraid of people looking at you? If so, dodge into a stall. They lock. You're safe in there.

If there are other fears...well, you may have some deeper issues. Really, though, it's all right. You can do this. If it helps, Double White Lines isn't completely off on this one. Wait until you absolutely MUST use the restroom. It makes it easier.

For what it's worth, I can relate to some degree...I would rather die of a ruptured bladder than use "the trough" common at sports stadiums.

Awkward question? Perhaps. Awkward answer? Oh yeah.

A: Dear Embarrassed,

This question has been pretty well covered, but I have one more suggestion to add: Use the handicapped stall.

Those ones are so much bigger and less used. Also, go to less often used restrooms at odd times of day (or at least during classes), so there aren't as many people there. After all, if you can have a public restroom all to yourself, it's hardly public anymore.


Question #41231 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

A good friend of mine gave me mass amounts of music the other week (sounds like an amazing friend right? You should all be jealous). Anyway, I have several albums of 'The Pixies' to work through, namely Bossanova, Come on Pilgrim, December 18, 2004, Doolittle, Surfer Rosa, and Trompe le Monde. Considering the only song I had previously heard from the Pixies was "Gouge Away," where do you suggest I start? Are there any songs with really interesting backgrounds/meanings?

- Mary Jane

A: Dear Mary Jane-

You may be my new official favorite person in the world. This is a fantastic question.

I, myself, am a huge Pixies fan. Gigantic. If you want someone cut out to answer this question, then Here Comes Your Man. Luckily, though, I'm not the only Board writer in history to like this band. Check out Board Question #25738 for some very good input from Petra.

I'm actually very excited for you, because I've listened to this stuff many a time, but you have the great opportunity to hear it all with fresh ears and wonder what kind of smoke your friend is crackin'. I say that because, well... the Pixies are pretty weird. Especially if you're a modern mainstream musical listener. Unless you're kinda into alternative rock already, you may be in for a bit of a shock. If you ARE an alt person, we should talk.

Oh, and I should probably say that the Board as an entity does not support sharing music if done in an illegal way blah blah whatever. I, personally, have views on this that will not be addressed at the present time.

Okay, to the subject matter. We'll have a brief history lesson, but this is a huge deal in my mind, so you'll have to indulge me for a few. Maybe you'll learn something.

The Pixies were formed in Boston in 1985. The band met its untimely demise in 1993. In the intervening years, they released, well, the five albums you listed (we'll get to this "December 18" business later)(You do have a pretty awesome friend, to have the whole discography.). They are known as one of the most influential rock bands of the time, and it's well-deserved. Let's make a few gross generalizations, shall we? Most of 90s alternative rock can be summed up into three categories: the "Nirvana" category, the "Pearl Jam" category, and the "Weezer" category. (Note to the purists: I'm not saying these bands invented their category, nor that they are the greatest within them, just that they serve best as an example. Plus, they ARE pretty seminal.) Now, the Pearl Jam category doesn't fit into what we're going to talk about, which is just as well since I despise most of it. However, the titular bands of the other categories (which categories I adore) both claim the Pixies as their direct inspiration. Both Kurt Cobain and Rivers Cuomo explicitly described their adoration and emulation of the Pixies. In my mind, therefore, the Pixies are sort of the Grandpappy of modern alternative.

Each of the members of the band has quite a unique style, which may become apparent to you as you begin to listen. For starters: you'll hear some Spanish. Black Francis has a crazy voice, and an incredible range, from "nice 'n' melodic" singing to "melt your face off" screaming (Not the kind of screaming in today's stuff. Just... listen to it.). Joey Santiago is an interesting guitar player; sometimes he seems almost in a different song. Or galaxy. Or key, at the least. The adjective that comes to mind when I hear him play is "spiraling." That's about as adequately as I can describe it, but it still works fantastically well with the rest of the band. Kim Deal, on bass, is one of the few elites on my personal "List of Women Who Can Actually Rock." Her riffs are powerful, and her voice can be lovely, as well as quite haunting. The interplay and harmony between her singing and Francis's are nigh unto perfection. And I'm not really a great drum person, but David Lovering is darn good on his set. When I pay attention to it, especially in something like "Vamos," I think "Dang, that guy is solid."

Fine, fine, I'll try to calm down a bit and answer what you asked. But I hope it's obvious how much I love this band. That's what I'm getting at, here. And I'm not alone; Radiohead, U2, the Foo Fighters, David Bowie, Coldplay, The Strokes, Husker Du, Spoon, and Blur, among many others (like Daniel Radcliffe!), are all avowed fans.

By most accounts, you should probably start with Doolittle. It's definitely their most easily grasped and accessible. I, personally, am a strict Always-Listen-to-the-Whole-Album freak, but I also realize that not everyone is, so here are some specific track recommendations, along with a brief comment on what they're about, since you asked:
Debaser: track 1, and a total classic. And it's about Un Chien Andalou, a surrealist film by Luis Bunuel and Salvador Dali.
Wave of Mutilation: about driving your car into the ocean, of course!
Dead: the story of David and Bathsheba.
Here Comes Your Man: If you can tell me what this is about, I'd be obliged. And impressed; it's one of the greater mysteries of this era. Crazy good, though.
Monkey Gone to Heaven: A great song. Mostly about pollution and the environment and whatnot. Also features some Hebrew Numerology.
Mr. Grieves and Crackity Jones are also some personal favorites from that CD.

Next, I'd attack Surfer Rosa. This is the one I actually cut my teeth on, and I think it may still be my favorite.
Bone Machine: Simply Awesome.
Gigantic: one of Kim Deal's key contributions to the band. Great stuff.
Where is my Mind?: Beautiful. Most popular Pixies song, hands down. It happens to be based on thoughts Black Francis had while scuba diving. Also used fantastically in Fight Club.

Come On Pilgrim is your next step. This is their first officially released EP, and probably has some of the most straightforward rock songs the Pixies ever wrote.
Caribou: Listen to him wail...
Isla de Encanta: 90% Spanish. 100% Awesome.
Nimrod's Son: There's a bad word in this one, but hey, it's a great song. Excellent use of acoustic guitar.

At Bossanova, you may enter rough waters. It was for me, at least. I love this album now, but when I started, it was somewhat hard to enjoy. I almost had to make myself like it. Sounds strange, yes, but I already knew I loved this band so I gave this one some extra attention. Think of it as an investment; it took an initial sacrifice, but I've gotten more payback from it than I ever put in. Some people, notably my sister-in-law, don't get this. Anyway. Track picks:
Rock Music: It rocks! And this is the screaming I'm talking about.
Velouria: Later covered (in tribute) by Weezer.
Is She Weird: I don't get this song. But I know I like it.
Dig for Fire: What Black Francis called his "Talking Heads tribute." It's a neat one.
The Happening: Francis had some strange obsessions with surf rock (see also: Wave of Mutilation, Cecilia Ann, Allison, etc.) and UFOs (see also: most of Trompe le Monde). This is a good one for the UFOs. Plus, it mentions the Great Salt Lake!

Trompe le Monde was the last and probably the least of the Pixies' albums. It's still very good, but this is basically the first Frank Black solo album (he reversed his name when he went solo), and it's kinda different. It tends to be heavier than their other albums as well. Still:
UMass: "IT'S EDUCATIONAL!" That'll tell you pretty much everything you need to know.
Letter to Memphis: another of the Pixies' most well-beloved songs.
Subbacultcha: Pokes some good ol' fun at what we might now call Goths. And it's funny.

Again, the entirety of these albums are great. My offering highlights is not an excuse to miss out on enjoying the greatness that is each of those CDs.

As for "December 18, 2004," I'll assume that that's a copy of a concert recording. In 2004, the Pixies played a long-anticipated reunion tour, and recorded and sold copies of the last twelve performances (As a side note, I, for reasons inexplicable, missed the show they played in Salt Lake City. I still haven't forgiven myself for it, and probably never will.). The full title would be "Twelve Final Shows: Live in New York - 12/18/2004" and it could be either the "Early Show" or "Late Show," since there are two recordings from that day. It looks to have a pretty good track lineup, but you have album versions of all but two songs on there ("Winterlong" and "In Heaven" are cover songs), so don't fret over live stuff too much too soon, I say.

So, Mary Jane... feel overwhelmed yet? Hopefully you can take all of this in, eventually. All I want is for somebody out there who doesn't already know this band to give them the chance they deserve, because it's completely worth it. If you enjoy, come to enjoy, or need to find out how to get some of this music, please, please, please send me an e-mail. foreman dot theboard at gmail dot com.

This Monkey's gone to Heaven,
A: Dear MJ,

To second my good friend Foreman, you would probably do best to start with Doolittle. The Pixies definitely have a learning curve to them...and Doolittle is the easiest to get into. I warn you, however...it's extremely addictive.

Sadly, Foreman already gave you all my favorite songs on that album...so listen to them.

Hey, Foreman, we should host a Pixies listening party.

Crack crack, Crackity Jones,

A: Claudio,

I'm completely down anytime you are. But you gotta branch out beyond Doolittle. It's a journey, not a destination.

Rock me, Joe,
Question #41230 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I was researching the history of the Reuben sandwich, because it is the most amazing sandwich ever. I found a few different stories about who originally made it, where it was made, ingredients, on and on. So I couldn't find a clear answer. I was hoping you guys could invent a great story of the birth of the Reuben, because some guy throwing together random stuff for a poker game is kind of lame.


- Basso Continuo

A: Dear Basso,

You know, that's really interesting. I think about stuff like that too sometimes - just get curious about things and want to learn about their history. For example, a couple of weeks ago I was flying on Jet Blue and watched a film about Jane Froman, whom I'd never heard of before. I kept meaning to look her up on Wikipedia, but I just kept forgetting to, and then a couple of days later I was in Hollywood and saw her star on the Walk of Fame. I finally did look her up just a couple of days ago, and really enjoyed reading about her. This year she would have turned 100, so they are re-releasing a bunch of her stuff, which is neat. I do really like her voice.


The Cleaning Lady.

P.S. You'll notice that this doesn't answer any question. That's because you didn't actually ask one...so I guess I dashed your hopes. Sorry about that. Good luck making up your own story about sandwiches.
Question #41229 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I am trying to figure out some xmas shopping. For my grampa, I was thinking about a good book, like something churchy. I am not too current on the new books, but are there any recent ones form the Prophet, or General Authorities that are a new must have?


- Basso Continuo

A: Dear Basso,

I recommend Elder Busche's Yearning for the Living God. It's not brand new, but it's a good one.

A: Dear George,

God Wants a Powerful People by Sheri Dew is pretty new and a hot item right now. Your grampa may also find Presidents and Prophets by Michael K. Winder interesting. There's also Book of Mormon Who's Who: Illustrated Edition by Ed J. Pinegar and Richard J. Allen, Commentaries and Insights on the Book of Mormon</I> by Pinegar and Allen, Visualizing the Lands of th Book of Mormon by Val Brinkerhoff and Dr. Joseph L. Allen, Discovering the Lands of the Book of Mormon by Dr. John L. Lund, United by Faith: The Joseph Sr. and Lucy Mack Smith Family compiled by Kyle R. Walker, and especially Unlocking the Book of Mormon: An Easy-to-Use Side-by-Side Commentary by Daniel Ludlow, Ed Pinegar, Richard Allen, Leaun Otten, and Max Caldwell. Hopefully those will give you some options. Just visit your nearest Seagull or Deseret Book store.

-Kicks and Giggles
Question #41227 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What brand of bass does the bassist in the movie School of Rock use? That thing looks and sounds sweet, just curious who made it.


- Buddha

A: Dear Siddhartha,

According to Wikipedia, that bass is a Framus Star. Unfortunately, they don't make them anymore...so you're going to have to go vintage if you want one of these bad boys.


Dear 100 Hour Board,

Is Borg a Collective noun?

- Anika

A: Dear Soul Cake Duck,

"We are the Borg. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile."


I would say yes.

Question #41225 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What are some ways to avoid getting married at BYU? (sarcasism is accepted) :D

- Abbz

A: Dear Abbz,

Just go back to bed.

-twice marked
A: Dear Clinkerbelle,

Turn down any and all dates; don't keep yourself well groomed (though you may eventually get turned into the HCO for this); never leave your apartment; avoid the periodical section of the library; live with me (although, this one only works until you're no longer living with me- after that, you're on your own... or maybe not).

A: Dear abbz,

Refuse to bathe, snarl at random strangers, kick small puppies (the cuter the better), take your fashion cues from Emo-Peter Parker in Spiderman 3. Demean and objectify others wherever you go, interrupt people constantly, complain and be ungrateful. Be painfully and obviously stingy with both your time and money. Hate children. Make mountains out of molehills, and miss the forest for the trees. Always be unsatisfied yet unmotivated, self-entitled yet self-loathing. Let your mind, body, and soul atrophy. When you're around the opposite sex, make inappropriate and uncomfortable non-sequiturs about sex, religion, or politics. Develop ignorance, vanity, Schadenfreude, and a callous disregard for the law of chastity and the word of wisdom.

Yup. Follow all that, and you'll not only stay single for a very long time, but life in general will be wretchedly miserable for you and everyone you come into contact with!

Ugh. I feel like I need a shower now.

A: Dear Abbz,

Be me.

- Katya
A: Dear Abbz,

Wear a ring already.

A: Dear Abbz

Cognoscente already took a bunch of the good ones (I respect the emo Peter Parker comment, that's the sort of gem you hope to find in that sort of list), but I'll see what I can come up with:

Wear Utah Ute apparel, tell your dates you hope to name a daughter after the Borg queen and a son after G.I. Joe characters (the code names, not their real names, of course), smuggle crushed willow tree root on dates and quietly mutter nonsense while sprinkling it on your dates meal, only communicate by blinking in morse code (however, as a positive, that mode of communication would make speaking at the same time impossible), remove your teeth and replace them with small acorns, abruptly end any conversation that threatens to become deeper than a wading pool, fake nausea halfway through movies until your date agrees to leave then tell them you were only kidding around when they're halfway home, eat garlic and become a close talker, run up credit card debt, tell your dates there will be no second date unless they purposefully flaunt societal constraints by only using the wrong gendered bathroom, only speak using quotes from movies and follow every utterance with "Do you know what that's from?", ask first dates if they'd be willing to cover your rent for the next two months, try and use profanity at least every other word if not more frequently, complain about every convenience of modern life and go to great lengths to convert society to ludditism, instead of a hug at the end of the first date go for a swift kick to the shin, key all date's cars, roll in garbage instead of bathing, study comic books, make the police beat on a weekly basis...

-Humble Master
A: Dear Abbz,

We all know that 95% percent of BYU guys ask out 5% of the girls. Just stay out of that 5%. The best way to do that is to be kind, intelligent, friendly, attractive, and altogether desirable.

Hey, it works for a lot of other people!

The Cleaning Lady
Question #41224 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What are the best ways to get rid of a bogeyman?

- Patricia

A: Dear Saffron,

Keep the light on, or use a nightlight.

-Kicks and Giggles
A: Dear Mrs. War,

According to the Terry Pratchett Wiki,
One way to get rid of a pestering bogeyman is to put a blanket on his head, because that makes him busy with being uncertain about his own existence
Or you could always just become a student of Susan Sto Helit.

A: Dear Patty,

Turn off the disco music. He just won't know what to do.

Wait, wait, that's a boogie man.

Bogeyman? You're just hosed.

A: Dear Ricia,

Give him some tissues and make him move out of the UK.

A: Dear Patricia

Even Bogeyman fear Return to Oz. Turn that movie on and anything will run from the room. Of course, you might not be able to sleep after seeing even a minute of it...

-Humble Master
Question #41217 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

In the Provo Temple baptistry (I haven't been to the big kids temple upstairs yet, so maybe that's why I'm confused), there is a door underneath the baptismal font (you can see it from the chapel). Where does it lead? I'm betting that it hides water heaters and pumps, but maybe it has something really cool down there.

Also, where does the organ music in the chapel come from? Is it a nice lady upstairs in the big kids section playing and the sound is piped in, or is it a tape? I'm betting it's not a tape because sometimes there are mistakes, but you never know.

- Epdawg

A: Dear Epdawg,

For your second question: yes, it's a real person playing the organ in a chapel upstairs, so that people who are waiting (whether to do baptisms or to do other ordinances) can feel the Spirit as they wait.

—Laser Jock
A: Wazz Epdawg,

I called the baptistry and spoke to a very nice temple worker who was also apparently the chicken farmer from Napoleon Dynamite. He said (at least I think) that the only time he's seen the door opened was when repairmen come to fix the font, so that probably means that it's just water heaters and pumps in there. Either that, or the secret headquarters of the Society of Baptismal Font Repairmen.

I didn't ask if the oxen have large talons, but I was tempted.


The Cleaning Lady
Question #41208 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I've decided that if I don't do a term in Hawaii while I'm here at BYU, I'll probably regret it for the rest of my life. I've visited Oahu before, so I kind of know what it's like, but I was hoping someone could give me some advice for a spring term in Hawaii. I'm curious about getting from Laie to Honolulu, should I get a bike, where do I go grocery shopping, where are good places to live, what are good, GE fulfilling, classes to take, are there any weird costs, what are the wards like, what are fun things to do in the area, and any other advice that is availible!

- Lilo

A: Dear Lilo-

As I know nothing about Hawaii, I forwarded your question on to my Book of Mormon professor, Brother Kerry Muhlestein. He taught there for a long time, and he talks about it very favorably in class from time to time. He's a mighty busy man of late, but he was able to send me this information:

I would recommend a term at BYU Hawaii to anyone. You will have a great experience, and in many ways, an experience that you cannot have anywhere else. The spirit of the place is amazing, and if you take the time to get to know some of the students from around the world (as opposed to just going to the beach), you will understand how international the church is in a way you haveń’t imagined.

It is difficult and expensive to get from Honolulu to Laie. If you doń’t know anyone there that can give you a ride, contact the university, often they (or they know of someone else) have a type of shuttle that runs between the two places for a much better price than you would get elsewhere.

Be very careful about what classes transfer, far fewer do than most people assume before they go. See your counselor and get in writing what classes will transfer, many students have been chagrined to take a class that did not.

There are not weird costs, but food and rent is expensive, very expensive. You doń’t really need to ask if there are fun things to do, the place is a fun place to do. You will not find yourself with enough time to do all that the place offers naturally. It is a fantastic experience! Bring your snorkeling equipment, your swimming and hiking stuff, and, yes, if you can, a bike. The island is beautiful, the more of it you can see the better.

The wards are one of the best parts of your experience. You will love your ward, and will meet people you could never meet elsewhere.

Hope that helps.

I, too, hope that helps. Brother Muhlestein, to whom I owe a debt of gratitude for this, is also a mad-awesome professor. The man knows his scriptures, and his is by far the best of the Book of Mormon classes I've taken (currently the tally is three. Don't ask). He specializes in the Old Testament, though, but if anyone's still looking for a religion professor, check out his sections.

Good luck in Hawaii!

A: Dear Lilo,

Like Foreman, I also sent your question to someone else. Here's a response from Master Fob, who grew up in Hawaii:
I've never lived in Lai'e, but four of my sisters went to BYUH so I'm fairly familiar with the area. There's a fairly reliable bus system that will get you between Lai'e and Honolulu, and there's a decent grocery store not far from campus. As far as places to live, my impression of Lai'e is that it's all pretty much the same and all within walking distance of campus, but then I haven't lived there myself. As for weird costs, you'll see those in the grocery store--seven bucks for a gallon of milk, five bucks for a box of cereal, and so on. Just about everything is expensive in Hawai'i.
- Katya
Question #41206 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Is is just me, or does the German Chocolate Crunch ice cream from the Creamery melt a lot faster than all other types of ice cream? If it's not just me, why does it do that?

- I scream

A: Dear You Scream,

"Well...we come in the name of science!"

With these words, spoken to a Creamery employee, began one of the most powerful coalitions on earth. Two mighty minds melding, causing questions to tremble in fear!


HFAC, of course, stands for, "Hey, it's Foreman and Claudio!"

We undertook this question in a way that was probably more than anyone should really think about it. We devised an experiment that was both bold and implausible.

Go to the Creamery on Ninth, buy four types of ice cream, and test them using the basic principles of calorimetry.

Oh yeah.

After a brief meeting of the minds, we established the following as our method of operations:

1) Purchase four types of ice cream. The first was to be the control. And is there any ice cream that screams control quite like vanilla? I think not. We used this, the most basic of ice creams, to test the others. The second ice cream was the one in question, German Chocolate Crunch. The third was Mint Chocolate Chip, and the fourth was Cookie Dough.

2) Take the initial temperature of the core of each ice cream.

3) Construct what is called a "coffee-cup calorimeter." Though calorimetry usually deals with combustion, we couldn't come up with a good and safe way to make ice cream blow up.

As such, we decided to let them go as follows: get four identical foam cups, fill them with 200 g of room temperature water, drop in a measured amount of each ice cream and monitor the changes in temperature. By doing so, we could figure out the total amount of heat transfer, and then use that to calculate the specific heat of each ice cream, hopefully helping us to understand if and why one type of ice cream might melt faster than others.

With the help of a saintly scooper named Melissa (who, unfortunately, couldn't accept tips), we were given carefully weighed samples of each of our four ice creams. The samples were removed from the freezer at the same time, at which point we started the stopwatch. All times given from this point forward will be in those terms.

The first measurement to be taken was the core temperature of each of the ice creams. As Claudio was taking the measurements, Foreman was scooping off and weighing samples of each ice cream and introducing them to their individual calorimeters. As quickly as his $15 cooking thermometer would allow, Claudio monitored the calorimeter temperatures, his lovely wife standing by to help record the data. Foreman organized the remaining bowls of ice cream, which were set out as a visual test of melting speed.

As was expected, the temperature of each calorimeter quickly dropped off as the ice cream absorbed its heat energy. They did not, however, go at equal rates.

Using this information, we calculated the amount of heat energy that flowed from the ice cream to the water (using the equation q=mass*specific heat*change in temperature). The specific heat of water, by the way, is 4.186.

Then, using that amount of heat energy, we calculated what the specific heat of each ice cream was. The lower the specific heat, the less energy it takes to warm it up one degree, and as such, the quicker it melts.

The data are as follows:

It would seem, Screamin' Reader, that you aren't actually too far off. According to our calculations, German Chocolate Crunch has the second lowest specific heat out of the group we selected.

We also measured the core temperatures of the bowls that we left sitting on the table:

The telling part of this chart is that the German Chocolate Crunch, despite starting at the coldest temperature, climbed to almost the same temperature as the others in the least time, indicating that it does, in fact, have a low specific heat, and thus does melt faster.

Congratulations on a rather astute observation!

Question #41040 posted on 12/05/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Which writer has the coolest bedroom (either at home or your apartment)? Or, if your bedroom isn't particularly cool, who has the coolest house and why?


A: Dearest Chilly,

I used to have a really cool bedroom. It was amazing! I even had a little sitting area and everything. My bedroom isn't so cool these days, though. I mean, it's not bad, but it's not much out of the ordinary.

Dragon Lady definitely has the coolest house ever out of all the writer houses that I have been to. Yup.

A: Dear Chillylint,

Next semester I will definitely have the coolest house. It is often known as "that cool log cabin house south of [this information I will not reveal, since I don't want any crazies stalking me]." It is all wooden, and above the door there is a sign in Elvish that says "speak friend and enter." Downstairs there are two giant Lovesacs and a big TV. There is a fireplace that we are allowed to use, and upstairs a small room entirely dedicated to a pin collection. And in the living room there is a candle chandelier that's lit with real candles. Oh, and there are grape vines outside on one side of the house. And there is fun art by this guy all over the walls. And one of my favourite families in the world lives there, and they speak Welsh.

A: Dearest Chillylint ~

I'd say current living status would go to Kicks and Giggles. Actually, her whole house is cool. But her bedroom is in the attic. How cool is that? In permanent housing, it has to go to Laser Jock. But I'll let him tell about that. I couldn't do it justice.

~ Dragon Lady
A: Dear Chilly,

Dragon Lady is probably talking about what I call my fort. It's modeled on a three-dimensional geometric shape that my dad showed me how to fold out of paper. As my Christmas gift when I was seven years old, my dad and I built a scaled-up version. My seven-year-old self chose to paint it my then-favorite color, purple. I sleep inside of it, even now that I'm older (when I go home and displace my sister, who now sleeps there). I also coated the inside with glow-in-the-dark stars.

It has some nifty features like a latch to hold the door open, controlled by a fishing line run to the inside (so I can close the door from inside). There is also a hook that runs to an eye that serves to lock the door when it's closed. The fort was originally meant to be outside, so the top is hinged and can open to the sky. There are also windows. And one of the absolute coolest features is the trap door that opens to reveal storage space in the bottom point. (At the time this was built, three little sisters could fit down in there at once.) [picture of features]

I've built a number of things with my dad over the years, but I think this would have to be my favorite.

—Laser Jock
A: Dear Gertrude,

Dragon Lady's right. My house and bedroom are the coolest....except for Tangerine's house next semester. I haven't seen it, but it sounds pretty dang cool.

But I digress. Current coolest living conditions goes to me. Azriel only thinks it's Dragon Lady's house because she hasn't been to mine yet.

So, my attic bedroom...slanted ceilings, painted (not printed) wallpaper (I know, I accidentally scratched the paint off of a flower), a chandelier-esque hanging-down light fixture, a very old door that is not rectangular but rather has the top corner cut off to fit that slant of the ceiling...honestly, I've never had a cooler bedroom.

-Kicks and Giggles