"When you get a little older, you'll see how easy it is to become lured by the female of the species." - 1960's Batman TV show
Question #41403 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

It's a top 10 favorite, but there are many, many new writers since those good ol' days. So please:

Can you give me suggestions on how to ruin my life?

- Too happy and looking for a solution to that problem

A: Dear Excessively Joyful:

1. Donate your life savings to the campaign of Jean-Marie Le Pen.
2. Break up with your significant other: tell them the reason is that you must hibernate and watch The Singles' Ward every day for the rest of your life.
3. Decide to adopt a diet exclusively consisting of Brussels sprouts, blue Powerade, and table salt.
4. Take your honeymoon in Iraq.
5. While on said honeymoon, tell your wife that you are going to start a polygamous commune upon your return.
6. Only speak with dialogue that has appeared in Mary Worth.
7. Never cut your fingernails, and go on Oprah to show off your talent.
8. Run onto the field during a BYU football game in red underwear, screaming, "God has revealed to me that the Utes are His chosen!"
9. Go to the MTC and make out with the first missionary you see.
10. Run up 13 credit cards' worth of debt buying nothing but leopard-print sandals.
11. Date Tom Cruise.
12. Dump buckets of paint on the displays in the Smithsonian.
13. Staple your eyes shut.
14. Only have Facebook friends.
15. Show up in a clown suit to your prom. Stalk your date for the next ten years. Never change out of the clown suit.

Hope that helps. I claim no liability should anyone actually do any of these things.

A: Dear Joykill-

Try drinking vinegar. Oof.

Question #41402 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Is there a good way to learn to not procrastinate? I have a final paper due tomorrow, and I guess I did take initiative and look for my library books, but now I need to type it, and I'm asking this question instead... Do any of the Board writers have time-tested ways to convince yourself to start things early?

Not yet quite panicked...

A: Dear Not Quite,

Ahh that time-old bad habit of procrastination. I've been plagued with it and will get to a solution one of these days but in the mean time I've come across a number of different methods that just haven't worked yet. For a while I would try to scare myself into getting things done. Yeah...that didn't work. Then I tried setting shorter time limits on myself than were required. Turns out I kept procrastinating, just sooner than I had expected.

My theory is that the only true way to rid one's self from this nasty habit is to take control of the small details in your life. For example, start becoming a person who never uses the snooze button in the mornings. Never let the dishes pile up in the sink. Get to bed earlier than you generally do. Once you're able to control those small details of your life you'll naturally be able to handle the big ones. Mind you I haven't tried this technique yet. I'll let you know how it goes once I get to it though.

-Just Another Cassio
...[remember to insert a side comment here].
A: Dear That's your problem,

As Melyngoch once said to me "I don't panic till the last minute, but you panic all along!"

For me, it's all tied up in being the sort of person who constantly worries and panics about the future, anyway. Sometimes it's useful, like when I start writing my term papers weeks or months in advance. Sometimes it's ridiculous, like when I'm stressed about not being able to pick a thesis topic for a master's program I may not ever even apply for.

Generally, though, I think it comes down to a basic awareness of the future and an ability to learn from your past experiences so that you don't repeat them again. All of which is easier said than done.

- Katya
Question #41396 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I am a fairly new reader, and was intrigued by the huge number of fellow readers asking how to become a writer. Everytime this question was asked, the writer referred the reader to the archives. I decided to look in the archives and found the answer within 3 minutes. I don't particularly want to apply to be a writer right now, but this bit of information on how I COULD become a writer is "burning a hole in my pocket," so to speak. Any suggestions of what I should do with this info?

- miss buonarroti

A: Dear,

You know, I think that's exactly what lead me to apply. I hadn't been planning on it, but knowing how made me want to try. So, if you're awesome, maybe you should apply anyway.

Other than that, there's not too much to do with the information. eBay doesn't care, and neither do the passersby in the HFAC.

But might I suggest deploying a fire extinguisher in your pockets? It looks like you're going to need it.

-Uffish Thought
A: Dear miss buonarroti,

You could always write it down on a piece of paper, fold the paper up into a ring, hang it from a chain around your neck, and walk around calling it "My Precious" in a really creepy voice.

Hey, it's just a suggestion.

Question #41395 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Why are the paper towel dispensers in most bathrooms on campus labeled in French as well as English? I would guess that French would be pretty far down on the list of primary languages spoken by students and visitors to campus.

- No one in particular

A: Dear No One,

In Canada, by law, such items must be labeled in French as well as in English. Because of that, some products which are sold in the US are also labeled in French and English, to avoid having to label products for the Canadian market separately.

- Katya
Question #41392 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

It has come to my roommates' attention that I have not seen some of the "Great American Classics" when it comes to movies, like Indiana Jones or Back to the Future. In order to rectify this problem, what do you think are the top 10 movies that everybody should see? If you can't narrow it down to ten, more works just as well.

- Cherry
(who has seen PART of Indiana Jones on TV...she just never got around to finishing it)

A: Dear Cherry,

In no particular order:
1 - Indiana Jones Trilogy
2 - Back to the Future Trilogy
3 - Better Off Dead
4 - Ferris Bueller's Day Off
5 - Say Anything
6 - The Baxter
7 - Clue
8 - The Adventures of Buckaroo Bonzai Across the Eight Dimension (must watch at least twice)
9 - To Kill A Mockingbird
10 - Mary Poppins
It's tough to narrow a list of classic movies per my opinion. Opening this up to the movies I've watched the most often we get the above list. Admittedly, most of my movies are from that grand decade of the eighties. [shrug]

-Just Another Cassio
...on the road to redemption.
A: Cherry

As JAC asserted, it is mighty difficult to make a top ten list of movies. Something is inevitably left out. Oddly enough, I have no problem making multiple top ten lists. I offer a few different kinds for your perusal:

Top Ten Films People Should See to be Pop Culture Savvy:

10. Jaws, this was the birth of the blockbuster and is responsible for the summer movie season as we now know it
9. Goonies, some sort of quirky eighties family-comedy had to make this list, and I chose Goonies
8. The Princess Bride, it's just so very quotable in everyday conversation, and Billy Crystal's Miracle Max is priceless
7. Rocky, sports movies are always going to be made, and this is one of the best (I don't care if the series got worse as it went on (Rocky V...ugh (though Rocky Balboa was good...)), this movie is fantastic, it won the best picture oscar in 1977)
6. Sixth Sense, not everything Shyamalan does is fantastic, but this film came out of nowhere to fascinate the movie going public (and nab a best picture nod)
5. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, this one gives a good feel for the whole series, though Raiders of the Lost Ark is also a classic (Temple of Doom gets too caught up in being creepy)
4. Back to the Future, feel free to watch the sequels, they're all good
3. Ghostbusters, dead-pan humor, ghosts, and crazy situations, it was this or Pirates of the Caribbean
2. Batman Begins, sort of like Goonies, this one is meant to be representative of an entire genre (Batman Begins beat out X2 and Spider-Man 2 on the strength of its cast)
1. Star Wars, I don't care what your feelings are about the series as a whole, or the unfortunate prequalogy, this series must be reckoned with in pop culture

Top Ten Films to Appreciate Film History

10. Birth of a Nation
9. M (this one has sound)
8. The Big Parade
7. Nosferatu
6. Trip to the Moon
5. The Kid
4. The General
3. Sunrise
2. Metropolis
1. Citizen Kane (this one too, the rest are silent)

Top Ten Films the Tickle my Fancy*:

10. Duck Soup
9. Life is Beautiful
8. The Prestige
7. The Quiet Man
6. Batman Begins
5. Clue
4. What's Up, Doc?
3. Dr. Strangelove
2. Groundhog Day
1. Unbreakable

-Humble Master

*This list is subject to change according to personal whim
Question #41391 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

When you write to a missionary, are the letters just send to the mission office/ mission president's house and then distributed to the missionaries? Because I have a friend in Virginia who I have been writing for a year and he has transferred several times but I always send the letters to the same address. Does this apply to all missions? If I know what mission a missionary is in but he hasn't given me his exact address is there a way to find that address to send him a postcard (besides just asking his parents for the address, I mean)?


A Big Fan of the Board

A: Dear Big Fan,

I've always been of the opinion that you ought to just send all your correspondence to the mission address. There's no telling when a missionary will be transferred and although it might be slower in some areas, the most guaranteed method of getting the Skittles to your missionary is through the mission office. Oh and yes, all missions sort mail through their office...well, always is a very definite word to use....

Lastly, addresses other than the mission office are only available from the missionary himself.

-Just Another Cassio
...will have a missionary out in the field soon.
Question #41390 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear Dragon Lady (and others who know),

I read the posts, but I am going to Jerusalem next semester and I still have more questions. How strict are they really about the dress code? Should I buy only huge, shapeless clothes? Can I blog over there and upload pictures to facebook? Are there opportunities to go places not scheduled by the Center (I have a friend in Israel I want to visit)? Can I wear jeans? How loose is loose-fitting?

Thanks for all your help!

- Excited to leave in one month and three days

A: Dear Excited ~

Nononono! Do not buy huge, shapeless clothes. Biggest regret of my trip was my choice of clothing. Seriously, you'll go to final orientation where they'll get up and scare you to death about what kinds of clothes to wear. You will end up searching all over Provo for the best deals on muumuus. Please do not do this. Remember, you have to look at these pictures for years to come. Yes, make sure that your clothing is not skin-tight. That would be very bad. Also, make sure your sleeves are closer to your elbows than your shoulders. In other words, don't wear cap sleeved tees. Make sure they are not low-cut. Don't let your midriff show. But you can look nice. If you want to see examples of what people wore over there, send me an email at dragon dot lady at the board dot byu dot edu and I will send you some links to facebook albums.

Yes, you can blog. In fact, I would greatly recommend blogging. It's a great way to keep everyone at home updated on what's going on in your life without having to send mass emails. Rather, I just sent one mass email with my blog address and let people read it at their own leisure. I used my blog as my journal as well. (Well, my more personal thoughts I wrote in my own personal journal. But most everything made it up on my blog.) My blog is incredibly detailed. Every day lasts about 5 pages. But I love it, even if no one else wants to read it, because it details my favorite experiences. And those people who took the time to read it saw an intimate side of me that people don't normally see. Some truly amazing things happened because of that blog. I would definitely recommend it.

Yes, you can upload pictures to facebook. You can also upload pictures to your blog. (I would recommend this. People are more likely to read your blog if there are pictures accompanying them.) You can upload pictures, but you cannot send pictures. Trying to email a picture may very well crash the entire Internet system at the Center and then everyone will hate you for being Internet-less for days. At least, that's what they told us. It never happened to our group. I would also suggest uploading your pictures at a time when no one else is on the Internet. Set up your computer in a remote corner somewhere where there is wireless and let it go during class, for example. Or, on free days when every one else is out in the city, but you're staying in to do homework, let it run.

There are lots of opportunities to go places not scheduled by the Center. Any time you are not in classes or field trips, you are free to go anywhere you'd like in the city, so long as you're in a group of three. (And if it's night time, one of the three must be a guy.) If you want to leave Jerusalem, you simply have to clear it through Security. You'll have to have your trip planned, how you're getting there, where exactly you are going and when you plan to be back. Security will check out the location of the place you are going (to make sure it's not a bad part of town) and then give their approval. They're really good about it, actually.

Yes, you can wear jeans. And please do. They're very comfortable. How loose is loose-fitting? Well, let me assure you that you don't want tight pants. And not just because of the crazy men who will leer at you, either. Israel is a desert. And not a Utah-like desert, either. This is a truly hot place to be. Tight jeans are simply overwhelming. My tightest pair of jeans (which weren't that tight) rarely got worn simply because they felt suffocating. So I have no way of telling you how tight is too tight, but I would make sure they're comfortable, move easily, don't stick to you, and breathe. I would also greatly recommend linen pants. I would also recommend casual skirts. Now before you balk at this idea, I am not a fan of wearing skirts or dresses. I change out of dresses the second I possibly can. I hate them. However, one day, I was wearing jeans, came home around 1:00 and decided to try wearing a skirt and headed back out. The difference in temperature between a skirt and the jeans was remarkable. I work skirts all the time after that. As long as you make them really casual, you can wear t-shirts and a good pair of sandals (I recommend Chacos or Tevas) and still be comfortable.

Hope that helped! If you have any other specific questions, please feel free to email me. I'd love to help. Especially if you'll bring me home some pop rocks chocolate. Mmmmm... I'd even let you borrow my hair dryer in exchange for some of that.

~ Dragon Lady
Question #41389 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What's the origin of the "clockwise" concept? Why don't our clocks move in the opposite direction? When did this direction become the convention for modern timepieces?

- Tastes Like Glue

A: Dear Tastes like Glue,

See Board Question #13433.

- the librarian
Question #41387 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I've been browsing the archives a fair amount lately and I noticed that the link for marking favorites is labeled "Mark from Favorites". But only in Firefox, IE seems to display it correctly, and only on the archive pages. I'm guessing this is a bug? Even though the link still works, it makes me hesitate just a bit before clicking it, since I wonder if I've actually marked it already and I'm going to be removing it.

I'm running Firefox on Windows XP, if that helps.

- Seoman (who <3 the Board)

A: Dear Seoman,

Thanks for catching that for us. All fixed now.

-Curious Physics Minor
Question #41385 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What is the difference between site-seeing and sight-seeing?


A: Dear Prince,

A "site" is a piece of land, generally one where something is going to be built or the location of archaeological remains. A "sight" is a touristy thing to look at.

"Site-seeing," then, is looking at pieces of land. "Sightseeing" is going and looking at famous things and places. One could be doing both, I suppose, if one was looking at a famous archaeological site on vacation, but "sightseeing" is the more usual term.

- Katya
Question #41383 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

So I am watching through season 2 of scrubs. Anyway, in season 2, episode 21, they cut to these random dancers, twice. I don't get what it is referring to. Is it something from a movie, or just a brilliant "huh?" moment that scrubs likes to deliver? So yeah, who are the guys in red pants, gold shirts, suspenders and berets?

- JD is my hero

A: Dear Mine, too-

Ah, Scrubs. Potentially my favorite comedy television show of all time.

For one, JD's daydream is ridiculous (as usual) because when it's set up ("Whenever I see two beautiful women that I've been intimate with talking to each other, I always have the same fantasy...") it sounds like something, well, nasty is coming on. Instead, we see them... doing the Rerun dance!

As you suggested, definitely a classic Scrubs non sequitur. But there's a story behind it, of course.

Rerun is a character from the 70s TV show What's Happening!! He's "an overweight, bumbling, comedic young man, commonly seen wearing a red beret and matching suspenders. He is often teased by his friends for being overweight and unintelligent. Rerun is a very skilled dancer and is commonly seen entering dance contests or trying to get on TV commercials. He is nicknamed 'Rerun' because, due to his failures in school, 'every summer he has to go to school to rerun the stuff he did all winter.'"

You can see a brief clip of the dance from the original show here.

Aside from being funny because it's random, it's great because of Turk and JD's known preference for old TV shows. Plus, they got Fred Berry, the original actor who played Rerun, to do the sketch. The reprise (about JD planning Turk's bachelor party) later in the episode is also great for the same reasons.

The fact that they're dancing to James Brown's "Sex Machine" makes it perfect. What a great show.

Form of an ice menorah!
A: Dear JD

I can't recall in which season's DVD set it is, but in the special features in one of them they interview the costume designer. The costume designer says that of all the crazy things they've had to come up with, getting twenty copies of Rerun's outfit in such short time was probably the most difficult.

-Humble Master
Question #41382 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I have this friend we'll call Kathy. Yes... Kathy with a K. She has been dating a really nice RM for a little while and is considering marrying him. I think it's all fine and dandy. They are perfect. Every time I see them together or a picture of them together (Which is frequent because it's Kathy's desktop picture) it makes my heart tingle with happiness. They get along great, and are so happy! The only dilemma with this potential marriage is that the really nice RM's mom wants them to wait for the really nice RM's little brother to get home from his mission, which will occur in a year. My question to you today: Would you wait a year? Or would you do the typical Mormon wedding deal, and get married in three months, without waiting for the really nice RM's brother to return home? Why? Why not?

- Practically Perfect

A: Dear Close Enough,

My older brother got married while I was still on my mission (coincidentally, with about a year left to go). Yeah, it wasn't cool for a bit, but I survived as the well-adjusted individual you see today. I suppose it helped that I had met the girl before, and she also wrote from time to time and made an effort to make the transition a little better.

Still, there's nothing like the Mother's Day phone call home moment: "So... you married my brother, huh?"

Our little brother is now on his mission, and frankly, if the occasion arises, I'll get married before he gets home. That's just how we do.

A: Dear Mary Poppins,

One of the reasons a mission is such a big sacrifice is that life does go on for other people while the missionary is gone. Nieces and nephews are born, siblings (and former girlfriends) get married, and older relatives die. That's just how it is.

If it was a matter of putting off the wedding for just a few weeks, or if the two brothers were very close to each other, or if my fiancé felt very strongly about having his brother at his wedding for some other reason, I'd consider putting off the wedding. Under most circumstances, though, I'd say that that's just how life is, sometimes.

- Katya
A: Dearest Practically Perfect,

Being engaged, or even pseudo-engaged, for an entire year is a bad idea unless they plan to forgo traditional standards and move in together. Doing it just so a brother can be at the wedding is an even worse idea. I think three to six months is an appropriate engagement period -- enough to plan to the wedding and make sure everybody still feels good about, but not so long that the waiting becomes a burden.

Katya is right, missing out on what goes on at home is one of the sacrifices a missionary makes and he cannot expect that they should delay beginning their marriage a year simply so he can be in the pictures. And more importantly, his mother will have to cope with the fact that a wedding can't always be fairy-tale perfect. The wedding day is a wonderful time, but really it pales in significance to a meaningful relationship afterwards.


Old Bald Guy
A: Dear Ms. Poppins,

You know, I love my brothers like crazy. I want them to be a part of every important aspect of my life, and I want to be part of theirs.

Of course, it just so happened that I fell in love while my brother was out on his mission. We knew it was the right time to get married...so we did. My brother saw the pictures. And that's all right. We both emerged from the experience with no hard feelings, and everyone's fine!

If there are any legitimate reasons to wait, then wait. If it's just a matter of, "Oooh, wait, Jimmy won't be there! We have to hold off on the beginnings of our eternal happiness!"...well, that just doesn't hold water for me.

May they wed soon. Man, nothing sucked worse than a long engagement. Seriously, it's just a weird holding pattern where you're not quite dating and not quite married. It was odd, and while I enjoyed that time to get to know my wife at an even deeper level, I was glad when it ended.

A: Dear Practically Perfect,

There's no way I'd wait for a full year. Quite frankly, being engaged is dangerous. It's easy to get into trouble with someone when you know that eventually it will be okay to do those things with them.

For what it's worth, my brother will be leaving on his mission in just under two weeks, and he has specifically instructed me that I am to be married by the time he returns home. So while the mother may want the whole family to be present, it's not improbable that the younger brother would be okay with not being there. I mean, he's the one out there teaching that people should be married in the temple, right?

Just a thought.

Question #41380 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Would you rather wear a Darth Fedora or eat an Obi-Wan Cannoli?

- Darth Fedora

A: Dear DF,

Darth Fedora
Black...always in style.
Covers your hideously scarred head.
Occasionally tightens, cutting off circulation to your brain.
Finds your lack of faith disturbing.
Once you go to the dark side of fashion, there's no coming back.

Obi-Wan Cannoli
Great with a shot of Qui-Gon Gin.
Sometimes, just when you go to stick your fork into it, it disappears, leaving a crumpled pile of sauce and cheese.
Resulting garlic breath is bad enough to scare off the sand people.


Leave the lightsaber. Take the cannoli.

A: Dear Darth ~

How could you pick anything but the Cannoli after watching this?

"Cuke, I am your father." "That's... quite impossible."

~ Dragon Lady
Question #41378 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I have been away from school for some time and now have to go back and do integration and I was wondering if you know of any good ways to review calculus? I don't have a book from high school and I don't have the money to buy a book so I was hoping you could help me out.
A poor student

A: Dear Derrida,

You really are a poor poor student if you have need to refresh yourself on calculus. I'm really not a math person, this coming from the woman who hasn't taken a math class since her junior year of high school. Anyway, I have a few suggestions.
-Buy an old edition of a calculus book. Try half.com, Ebay, or somewhere like the discontinued section of the BYU Bookstore.
-But a calculus review book. These are available online in several places or in many local bookstores!

Yes, college students don't have a lot of money- this I know. But you probably really could find a good deal on one that would help you to review everything.

A: Dear Derrida,

Don't have enough money to buy a book? That's what libraries are for.

Good luck.

A: Dear Derrida,

Don't rule out online resources! Try S.O.S. Math, this website from Harvey Mudd College, and this article from Slashdot, which includes reviews of and links to five free online calculus books.

- Katya
Question #41376 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Have you ever seen those license plates that say "Board Utah" instead of "Ski Utah"? Where do I get one? I can't find them anywhere!

- Boarder for Life

A: Dear Fellow Boarder*:

It's a sticker that people put over the skier. This website claims that the Salt Lake City Chamber has them. I bet your local ski shop would, especially at a place like Brighton which is geared towards snowboarders. Beware, though: apparently at least one person has gotten a ticket for tampering with a license plate in this way.


*Ha, that's punny.
Question #41375 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Who picks the music for BYU sporting events? I recently heard a song called Wildcat by an obscure group named Ratatat, and I feel it should be utilized. Could you use your social clout as board members to implement the use of this choice bit of music?
- C0ug4ar f4n

A: Dear CF,

The answer to your first question can be found in this one. As for your second question...well, maybe we could, but seeing as I don't really give a ratatat's wildcat about it, I think it would be best if you just called Bill Hoopes in Athletic Marketing at 422-8260 yourself. (Ah, heck, now you don't even need that link.)


The Cleaning Lady
Question #41372 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I need some wisdom on this one. I noticed my roommate eating Ramen noodles with a spoon, and I laughed! He said he liked getting more broth in his bites, even though traditionally people eat it with a fork. Then I looked carefully at the package, and it says "Ramen noodle SOUP". And then I thought, "don't you eat soup with a spoon?" You eat chicken noodle soup with a spoon, right? But Asians probably eat it with chopsticks, and a fork is America's equivalent to those utensils. So my question is, what should you eat Ramen noodle SOUP with? A spoon? A fork? What say ye?

- Eat's any meal that's only 19 cents.

A: Dear Eats ~

For the record, I would venture to say that anything Americans eat with a spoon, Asians do, too.

As for Ramen, it depends. If I'm going to eat it normally, I'm going to use a fork. Because I drain off all the juice anyway and eat it as just noodles. Actually, I'm much more likely to add vegetables and perhaps chicken to the mix and make it a stir fry-like dish. No spoon for that! If I want to eat Ramen as a soup, I would crumble up the noodles into much smaller bits and eat it with a spoon. I don't like long dangly noodles. Spaghetti noodles I break in half before cooking, then cut with a knife before eating. Ramen I typically nibble off the folded over end, effectively cutting the noodles in half. (Only if I'm the only one eating the Ramen, though.)

So I say, if you're eating it as a soup, go with a spoon. If you're eating it as noodles, use a fork.

~ Dragon Lady
A: Dear Ramen Man,

Although I switch back and forth, I can totally understand eating Ramen with a spoon! I have done this a good few times myself. Because the noodles are so long (and unlike Dragon Lady, I love long noodles) you can shove the spoon in there, twist it around, and get a good amount of noodles up there along with a spoon full of broth! It is a pretty nice set up. Then after more of the noodles are gone you start to chop them up just a bit and a spoon still works.

Question #41371 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

There was once a dentist in my ward who claimed that after brushing one's teeth one should spit out the toothpaste, and then rather than rinsing the residual toothpaste from the mouth should swallow it, and as a result one's bones would become harder and less prone to fracture. Is there any truth to this?

- The Dart

A: Dear The Dart,

From my expanding understanding of bone production I would say no. To me, it doesn't chemically make any sense. To eat enough toothpaste to make a difference to your skeletal system would cause damages that would weigh out any possible benefit (please, don't eat toothpaste). It is a good idea, however, to not rinse your mouth with water after spitting out the residual toothpaste and refrain from eating for an hour or so. This will allow the toothpaste (especially if it contains fluoride) to work on your teeth even after you've brushed. I don't like toothpastey feeling in my mouth after I brush so I just rinse lightly to get it off my tongue. I haven't had a cavity yet so take that for what it's worth.

- steen, the toothful wonder
Question #41370 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

So if I happened to have a yard long piece of nylon rope, a tuning fork tuned to an A above middle C, a blue retractable pen and a broken black one, and a wallet with various ID's, a debit card, and some "stamp cards," all in a high school class, what could I do with them that would be non-disruptive and could keep me in my ADD(ish) mind occupied for 57 minutes? Oh, and I have lined paper and backpacky stuff too.

- Giovanni Harrison Rutherford Maximillian Ebenezer Geofferey Mortimer Lawrence Algernon Schwartz

P.S. This list isn't random... That's really what I had in my pockets today at school...

A: Dear Giovanni Harrison Rutherford Maximillian Ebenezer Geofferey Mortimer Lawrence Algernon Schwartz,

-Step One: Convince the cute girl beside you that you are a really nice guy. Let her borrow your pen (the non-broken one), show her the tuning fork (girls like musical guys), and say sweet things.
-Step Two: Write a ransom note and leave it on your desk for the next day. Say that someone has kidnapped you and you are being forced to write the note yourself. Leave ID cards as proof that it was indeed you.
-Step Three: Now, if you did step one correctly then the girl will perhaps be a little worried. However, let us count on the fact that she will not take any action that specific day.
-Step Four: Have another random note waiting on your desk the next day. Today also include your broken pen hanging from the piece of nylon rope. The girl, having borrowed a similar pen a few days before will realize that this means business.
-Step Five: The girl will follow the instructions on the ransom note, indicating that she should dress nicely and show up at a specific stop at a specified time.
-Step Six: When the girl shows up, come out of the shadows. She will be exceptionally happy to see you and will hug you. Then use your debit card to pay for a date with her, because of course since she is already there you might as well have a date!

Ok, ok, so that would be a bit disruptive and it would take longer than 57 minutes. But Í’d get a good giggle out of it and you'd get a date.

-The Cheeky Chickie
Question #41369 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I just saw a friend that I haven't seen in over a year and she looks different... because she has had plastic surgery to her nose. What would be a tactful way of approaching that subject of asking whether or not it was cosmetic or functional or...?

- (Gorilla Quandary)

A: Dear GQ,

Just because you can see that there's been a change, that doesn't mean that it's your business why or when she had it done, which is why I don't think that there is a tactful or appropriate way of asking.

If you strike up your friendship again, she may some day mention the car accident she was in or that she never really liked her old nose in the first place. Alternately, you could ask a mutual friend of yours if they know anything about it (but that's a bit gossipy). If neither of those situations pans out, then you may be left wondering for the ages.

- Katya
Question #41367 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What is the origin of the "phrase" "Boom chicka wow wow?"

The first place that I heard it was a Red vs Blue episode, and now it seems like it is everywhere! But where did it start?

- Fredjikrang

A: Dear Fred,

I'm going to assume that you mean "BOW chicka wow wow." That onomatopoeic phrase is based in the sound of a guitar using a wah-wah pedal. For a good instance of this, check out "Voodoo Child" by Jimi Hendrix. You'll note that the guitar does sort of make those sounds.

Now, as to why it's associated with romantic/sensual circumstances...well, guitar with a wah-wah was used in the soundtracks to movies...of ill repute. As such, that sound effect has come to be associated with risqué situations.

Question #41365 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Why do some guys at BYU wear moustaches? Is it just because they can, or do they think moustaches are coming back from the 80s? I'm a guy and I shudder inside whenever I see a moustache.


A: Dear Norelco-o-o-o!

I know a few guys who wear a mustache so I asked! Guy the first said that it was because he has an awful scar on his upper lip (most likely from saving a baby from getting hit by a car) and he likes to be able to cover up the unsightly battle scar. Guy the second said that he thought it suited his face (if you saw him you might agree). Guy the third starting wearing one because a previous girlfriend had asked him to grow one and then he decided he rather liked it. He said it also had to do with being lazy and not wanting to shave all of his face that often. And finally, guy the fourth said that he thought it gave him a rugged manly look. Most of them also said that those without mustaches are just jealous that they don't have one (probably because they can't grow a proper one).

So there you have it! Right from the mustached mouth of 4 different men.
-The Cheeky Chickie
Question #41364 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

My kids love elephants. I love elephants. It seems that most people rally enjoy looking at elephants. Ideally, what type of space would be adequate for a pair of elephants in a zoo? I've seen small and large homes. Also, is it against the law to have an elephant as a pet?
- Wants a hippo for Christmas

A: Dear Elephant/Hippo Lover,

According to an article entitled Biology, Medicine, and Surgery of Elephants by Murray Fowler it is a great source of controversy trying to decide how much room an elephant needs. It has been reported that an elephant could roam as much as 50 miles in one day or as little as 1-2 miles a day. Apparently there areń’t many official and scientific reports that say exactly how much space an elephant should have in captivity.

However, in another article (this one by Annie Flanzraich) called Elephants Benefit from Fight between Zoos and Activists they give a bit of information about what is being done in zoos around the world. According to the Association of Zoos and Aquariums, they are required to have at least 400 square feet of indoor space and 1,800 square feet for an elephant habitat. However, animal-rights activists will tell you that elephants need much more space than this to live.

Here are a few stats from some places that have elephants:
-Sedgwick County Zoo: 3.6 acres for their 6 elephants to roam.
-Elephant Sanctuary in Tennessee: 2,700 acres for 23 elephants.
-Performing Animal Welfare Society (California Sanctuary): 75 acres for 8 elephants.

As you can see, the amount of space for elephants varies greatly from place to place. This makes it hard for me to give you a very specific answer. It would appear that in both articles, people appeared to be more concerned about the care that the animal was receiving at the place where it is housed. If the elephant has adequate space to live and is provided properly with the things that it needs, then it would be able to live. Perhaps not live as well as it would in the wild, but live indeed.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that elephants are most likely illegal to have as pets (at least in Utah). Something leads me to believe that it isn't a topic that comes up often. This site gives a little bit of an overview on the different law governing the ownership of exotic pets in the United States.

A: Dear Pet Lover,

Yeah, yeah, I hear what Krishna is saying but if you want a hippo or an elephant all you need are three things:
1. A huge open space and the means to care for an elephant.
2. Enormous amounts of money.
3. Black market connections.

I'm working on the Black Market connections. When I get some I'll let you know and we'll have fun with all of those things the silly government doesn't approve of us having.

-The Cheeky Chickie
Question #41360 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I was reading a posting last week about how signature card numbers are assigned, and it reminded me of an amusing mystery we discovered back in my days of working at Cougar Express. When we were really bored we would sometimes hit the button to check a signature card balance, and then we'd punch in a random number to see if anyone actually had that number. I don't think we ever actually did pull up anyone's information punching in random numbers, but we did find that if you punch in the number 12-345-6789 (or maybe 01-234-5678) the signature card information will come up for someone named "Cookie Snuffalufagus." No joke! You can go and try it yourselves (just go and ask to check your balance and tell them that number). That is, if someone at the signature card office hasn't gotten rid of Snuffy's file. But we were wondering--who assigned that number to two Sesame Street characters, and why? Was it someone's idea of a good joke? (If so, I would say that it actually was a pretty good joke!)

-Hoping there isn't a BYU student that is really named "Cookie Snuffalufagus"

A: Dear Hope,

A long time ago, at a job far, far away (c. 2002), I helped write the documentation for the new AIM system. In order for the developers to test it and for the documenters to document it, we had to have fake students that we could put through the paces -- add classes, drop classes, change graduate committees, put on academic probation, submit grades, etc. I spent many an hour ruining (and fixing) the lives of Cookie Snuffalufagus and many others. It's been so long now I can only remember Joe Student, Jane Student, and the Camper siblings Happy, Happier, and Happiest, but there was an extensive list of probably 30 or 40 fake students, many with pretty funny names like Mish N. Ary. I guess some of them are still hanging around in the system.

So that's why. As for who, I can only say it was the initial developers who set up the development environment for the new AIM.

-=Optimus Prime=-
A: Dear Optimus Prime

I saw this question in the inbox, and thought to myself "That's going to be as hard to answer as the one about gerbil hair melting into purple font sizes. I shan't touch it with a ten foot pole." I think its pretty amazing that the origin of Cookie Cookie Snuffalufagus's presence in the BYU computer system could be answered with no research whatsoever.

-Humble Master
posted on 11/10/2010 5:37 a.m.
Dear Hope,

I happened to come across some old files with at least a partial list of these names and I thought of this question. For posterity, and those interested, here are the fake students, followed by the fake teachers.

-=Optimus Prime=-

Pumpkin Head
Potato Head
Wendy Witch
Sleepy Hollow
Hannah Harvest
Gobby Goblin
Ghostie Goblin
Windy Weather
June Bride
Stormy Weather
Hagar Horrible
Frosty Snowman
Candy Halloween
Icabond Crane
Big Tommy Turkey
Lucky Leprachun
Holly Halloween
Happy Halloween
Bob Marley
Bob Marley
Cookie Snuffaluffagus
Tom Turkey
King Spud
Road Runner
Buzz Lightyear
Mighty Mouse
Hickory Dickory Dock
Scooby Doo
Woody Woodpecker
Papa Smurf
Hazel Witch
Bitsy Spider
Gilligan Island
Happier Z Camper
Happiest Y Camper
Happy Camper
Happy Camper
Happy Camper
Happy Camper
Happy J Camper
Tupper Ware
Spoiled Brat
Laundra Matt
Mish N Ary
Camie Lot
Suzy Darlene Que
Mary Christmas
Bill Student
Fred Student
Jacob Student
Jan Student
Jane Student
Jane Doe Student
Janet Student
Jeannie K Student
Jerry Student
Jill Student
Joanne L Student
Joe Student
Joe Student
Joe Student
Joey Student
Joseph Student
Julie Student
Junior Student

Albus Dumbledore
Serverus Snape
Minerva McGonagal
Harry Potter
Flanagus Mckenzie
Bill Shakespeare
Edwina Wormwood
Eugene Wamsetter
Master K
Yoda Force
Kevin Senecal
Ellen Macdondald
Pompus Windbag
Killer Final
Rodgers Neighborhood
John Thompson
Vikki Brumstead
Beatrice Smith
Victor Mumford
Keegan Donahue
Sean Devlin
Asa Vaughn
Alan Knotts
Lisa Cavewoman
Peter Pan
Wesley Buttercup
Prince Humperdink
Miracle Max
Remus Lupin
Virgil Aneid
Question #41357 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I have played the piano for about 7 years, and am not too shabby. I want to learn to play the organ, so I signed up for Basic Organ Skills 115 for next semester. Is this class for people who have never played either the piano or organ? Or is it for people with piano skills who want to learn the organ as well? I mean I don't want to learn the organ by playing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.

- october quick

A: Dear october quick,

Yay for the organ! Organ 115 is designed for people who can play the piano proficiently and don't have any experience with the organ. I took private lessons my senior year of high school (yes, I know I'm a nerd) from a BYU organ grad and we just basically went through Dr. Cook's book. There will be times when you think you are going too slow and that you don't need to do all of the finger exercises but I promise if you will honestly put the time into it you will learn the correct technique the first time. It's more different than I thought it would be but I didn't really see that until I had been playing awhile. I took the next group class up when I was a freshman from Dr. Cook and loved it; it was more of a go-your-own-pace type of class. Then the next semester I took lessons for free from a grad student. I recommend that route after you feel comfortable playing (just meet more than 4 times in the semester...). All those lessons (organ and piano) and I hardly get to play anymore. Someday I'll have free time.

- steen
A: Dear october quick,

To second what steen says, yes, the class is designed for people who are proficient at the piano. When I took it, we actually had a couple of students drop because it was too hard. From what I understand, most organists start out on the piano because it's a good way to develop finger strength (and because pianos are much more common) and then switch to organ in later years.

- Katya, who will also get back to the organ, some day
Question #41355 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

You should check out the music video for "because of you" with Reba and Kelly Clarkson both singing. It's very interesting: their costumes are great period clothing, and I think it's interesting to see the "story" in it. What do you think exactly is going on there? Is Kelly being abused? And Reba's her...mentor? Opinions?


A: Dear Agatha,

According to Wikipedia, the two are supposed to be lounge singers from the 30s and yes, Kelly's boyfriend is abusing (and cheating on) her. The article doesn't clarify McEntire's role, but I think that your image of her as a friend or mentor is a good one.

- Katya
Question #41354 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

How many freshmen are there at BYU?


- +2 Ask

A: Dear +2,

Let's see what we can find out.

According to BYU's Entrance Averages, 7,375 freshmen were accepted for the 2007 summer term/fall semester.


That'll be 1 piña colada.

-The Investigator
Question #41353 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I am really good friends with this one guy. This one guys also happens to be way cute which adds to the problem. We REALLY are just friends. No romantic interest at all. Problem: This guy waits for my ward to get out after his so we can walk home together. Sometimes he attends my ward. People in my ward some how always run into us when we're together. People in my ward have never been introduced to him yet know his name. My bishop asks me how he's doing. People think we're dating! And they have every reason to think so I guess considering when ever they run into me anywhere they also run into him. This makes it hard to get asked out. What should I do? He's my best friend, its kind of rude/hard/lame to say we can't be seen in public anymore.... Help!!

- Too nice for her own good

A: Dear,

Start setting him up with friends in your ward. And when you Bishop asks about him, tell him about your friend's frustration with his dating woes.

-songs of inexperience.
A: Dear Too nice,

Um, are you sure there's no romantic interest on his side? Because if he's with you all the time, it doesn't sound like he's dating anyone else, either. If you're sure he's not interested in you, then maybe you can talk with him about it and come up with a solution; he probably has the same problem with people thinking he's taken.

Either way, if you want to send a message to all guys that you're available, the best solution would be for you to ask out a guy in your ward.


The Cleaning Lady
A: Dear Saffron,

I have a friend like that. I tell people he's my cousin. Because there is no romantic interest but our relationship is very close, I figure he might as well be. He's my cousin in spirit, so to speak.

-Kicks and Giggles
Question #41352 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

So I was talking to my Latin teacher and we decided that Latin stemmed from an old Italic language that is covered in the indo-european languages.

I was wondering... if the italics button in microsoft word that makes letters go italicized/ slanted... if that has anything to do with that old language...

ok in summary because i coudl not understand what i wrote, nor make it sound any better...

Is there a connection between the old language and the 'ill make you go slanted if you push this button in Microsoft word'? By callign them both italic of course.

A: Dear Katya,

Both words come from the word "Italy" (or "Italia") but are otherwise unrelated. The Italic Language is postulated to have been spoken between 2000 and 700 B.C. This family of languages is so called because its speakers immigrated to Italy.

"Italics" (like this) come from a slanted typeface first introduced in Italy in the early 16th century, well after the original Italic Language had died out.

- Katya
Question #41351 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What's a good thing to do with old, obsolete textbooks? My roommate collects them.

-Burn, Burn, Burn!

A: Dear Reader,

Altered book art.

- Katya
A: Dear Burn ~

Or, altered book art. (Same title, much different art.)

~ Dragon Lady
Question #41349 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

So this guy and I have been like best friends for two and a half years. A little over a month ago, we finally decided to take the next step and actually date. It lasted a week. Like to the hour, a week. Our first night as a couple was usual for us and we hugged goodbye. The next night we went for a walk and ended up having a very pleasant evening together. VERY pleasant :) It was our first kiss together. He's kissed plenty before, but this was my first kiss. The next night, we were with our friends who are dating each other and one goes, "Hey I want to see you guys kiss!" My boyfriend at the time says awkwardly, "I haven't even seen us kiss." It was a little tense then. Boyfriend and I leave our friends and just go cuddle, which is always nice. The next day, boyfriend is being weird. He hasn't kissed me since the first time. So when I confronted him on his behavior, he said he really enjoyed kissing me and was even surprised at how much he enjoyed it. But he started feeling awkward about kissing me when our friend made that comment. We decided together that just because we're dating, it doesn't mean we change the way we act with each other. We can be normal, but spice it up a little if we want: hold hands, cuddle. About two DTR's later, we broke up.

I hate to say it, but I'm still getting over it. Why'd we break up? Do you think he broke up with me over feeling awkward about kissing? We decided together to slow down and we didn't even have to kiss. And yet he was still uncomfortable? He's the one who has kissed plenty and he's being weird? Shouldn't it be me freaking out about it? What's going on?

- Whatev

A: Dear rightly confused,

I think that I'd be pretty confused in your situation. I've been in lots of situations where a guy has done something that expressed interest and then suddenly started to act oddly. Trust me, it happens. A lot. To be perfectly blunt with you, from what you have said it sounds like he feels like he made a mistake. This is how the situation is playing out in my head for said ex-boyfriend:
-Boy becomes best friend with girl.
-After time and because of pressures boy decides to give dating a shot.
-Boy goes out with girl and ends up kissing her.
-Boy figures out that he prefers to think of girl as only a friend.
-Things get awkward because boy doesn't know how to let girl know.
-Girl confronts boy and boy doesn't want to hurt girl's feelings so he beats around the bush.
-Girl and boy break up and boy feels slightly relieved that the awkward situation is gone but still realizes that things are strained between him and girl.

Humans are fickle things. I would just try to let it go and be his friend. Since you still seem to want to date him, this might be really hard. My advice would be to see if you could get things back to where they were friendship-wise. I don't think the door to dating your friend is closed, but it doesn't look like it is going to happen right now for you. I would say that either he isn't interested or he isn't ready.

Question #41348 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Haha, this is going to be a gross question. From a health point of view, is it really all that bad to not take showers every day? Just about every generation before us did it, and many of them got along just fine. Why can't I?

-Smells like a skunk

A: Dear skunk,

When I was little, I only showered once a week, on Saturday. And every once in a while I'd miss a Saturday and just not tell my mom about it. No ill effects suffered.

Thank you for being the inspiration for the latest poll on my blog.

A: Dear Reader,

Your signature is your answer. The practice of showering daily is less for reasons of health and more for the benefit of those who have to spend time with you throughout the day. You're right that most previous generations bathed less frequently, but modern, 1st world sensibilities are such that we aren't very tolerant of natural bodily smells.

Depending on your personal body chemistry and on your normal daily activities, you may be able to get away with showering less frequently than every day.

- Katya
A: Dear Smells ~

Really, it all depends on who you are and your amount of physical activity. Some people simply don't smell bad very quickly. Some people emit body odor at record speed. If you are exercising or playing sports or rolling in the mud on a daily basis, I would recommend you shower to get rid of the odor and dirt built up from that. However, I know many, many people who are quite capable of going a day or two between showers, and no one is the wiser. And I know enough of these people that I don't want the Board to present the opinion that if people don't shower every single day that they are suddenly socially deficient.

Discussing it with Laser Jock and Desdemona, we have also decided that girls more often skip a day than guys do, mostly because girl hair takes a lot longer to wash, dry and style. But keep in mind, there is a difference between showering every day and washing hair every day. You can take a shower and not wash your hair.

Health-wise, I don't think there is anything necessarily unhealthy. Perhaps your social health might be at stake... but that's all I can see.

~ Dragon Lady
Question #41346 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

As I was strolling past the Student Athlete Building this morning, I noticed that on the north west side between the cement barrier next to the building and the sidewalk there is a garden area that is full of what looks like strawberry plants. Are they really strawberries? I think it odd to plant strawberries on campus for decoration. I would think that daisies or maybe petunias might be a more common choice! So my question, are these indeed strawberries?

- i love fragaria ananassa

A: Dear Umcherrel,

Yes. Sometimes when I used to walk by there I'd be really tempted to pick a few when they were ripe. I love strawberries!

Question #41344 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I have been wondering why we put texture on walls? I mean what's the point of having that extra clay stuff on the ceiling of your room, or on the sides of your walls. I know that some of it on the walls is from the rollers that are used when painting, but what about the texture that is purposely sprayed on the walls? Who invented that and why? Most of the time it goes unnoticed, but I believe it is such an odd tradtion when you think about it!

- Why not smooth walls?

A: Dear why not,

So that when your kid runs his bike into the wall, your cat scratches the wall, you accidentally scrape your couch along the wall, or your baby snots all over the wall, it's not so noticeable.

A: Dear Why,

A large part of it (especially for the walls) is just to add some character to the room. Flat, plain surfaces are dull and uninteresting. However, you can really make things more interesting by adding some texture.

For the ceiling, it's typically a bit more practical. I found a list here that nicely sums up why many ceilings have an acoustic finish (also called a textured finish, or popcorn):
* It keeps you from having to plaster and sand the ceiling. If you've ever done it, you know that plastering a ceiling is no fun.
* It hides lots of imperfections in the ceiling. The ceiling is a huge, flat, uninterrupted and well-lit expanse. Any imperfection is immediately obvious. The texturing hides imperfections very effectively.
* It helps eliminate echo in a room. If you have ever talked in a room before and after carpeting, you know what a big difference carpet makes on echoes. An acoustic finish is like carpeting the ceiling.
—Laser Jock
A: Dear Why ~

Or, so when you flip mashed potatoes into the ceiling fan at dinner time, your mom won't noticed the new texture on the ceiling until much later when the potatoes have fallen off and only the remnants remain to discolor the ceiling.

Not that I have any personal experience with this or anything...

~ Dragon Lady
Question #41343 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear Dragon Lady,

Tell me more about study abroad in China. Did you go with one of BYU's programs? What recommendations do you have for selecting a program? What must one see and do while over there?

- Considering Study in China

A: Dear Considering ~

Well, I will answer to the best of my knowledge. Sadly, I don't think it's the answer you want, as I did not do a Study Abroad in China. Nor did I go through BYU. Rather, I did a Service Abroad in China through International Language Programs. So, for selecting a program, I would suggest selecting ILP. Or... you could go to the BYU Study Abroad Center and see what their study abroad is like. That's about as much help as I can give there.

Now, what must one see and do? You definitely needs as much time in Beijing as possible. There you can go to an Acrobats show (which I highly recommend), see Forbidden City, Summer Palace, and Tiananmen Square. You can take a bus up to the Great Wall and walk up that. (If you're not incredibly fit, I would recommend taking the tram up there...at least halfway. I have no idea how they possibly carried all of those enormous blocks of stone up to the tip top of those mountain ridges. I have much respect for those men.)

Outside of Beijing, there are many places you should go if you have the chance. Shanghai I hear is fantastic. Southern China is one place I would love to go sometime. That is traditional China—the place to see panda bears and rice patties. Guilin and the terracotta warriors are definitely must-sees. Also, a trip down the Yangtze River would be fantastic.

None of the above paragraph I have done. I just want to someday. My personal experience was in Urumqi—the capital of the XinJiang province. It's in the very northwest corner, and no one has ever visited it. In fact, the first line in our travel guide for Urumqi was something to the effect of, "The only thing Urumqi is famous for is being the furthest city in the world from an ocean." I found this highly ironic as I had never yet seen an ocean. (Sure, I had just flown across one for 12 hours, but it was a night flight! Dark the entire time.) Although the tour books didn't give it much stock, I loved being there. This question isn't asking about my experience, though, just what to see. So, if you happen to get out there, or any other place in China that has a large population of Uygers, be sure to buy some Uyger bread off the street. That is by far the food I miss the most.

Another must-do if you ever end up near Urumuqi is Tianchi, or Heavens Lake. Gorgeous place, really. You can sleep in a yurt and ride horses around the lake. If you're really lucky, perhaps you'll even have some drunk men come into your yurt and have a sing along. "We will drink and then sing, and then we will drink some more, and then we will sing louder and drink more and sing even louder!"

Or, out in the middle of China Dunhuang, where you can ride camels for hours across the most enormous sand dunes you will ever see. There is also Xiahe, home of the Labrang Lamma Buddhist monastery—one of the largest Tibetan Buddhist monasteries outside of Tibet. They say it's the closest you can get to Tibet without actually going there. Which was great for us, since we weren't allowed to go to Tibet.

Without knowing where in China you are going, I can't tell you the best places to go and what to do. Actually, unless it's about something I've already talked about, chances are great that I still can't tell you where to go and what to do. But hopefully that gives you a start. Good luck!

Oh, and btw, I saw a poster in the Law Building today advertising for studying law in China. So, if that's something you're interested in, go check out the bulletin boards on floor two.

~ Dragon Lady
Question #41342 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Who would I have to talk to/What would I have to do to get an "okay" to work more than 20 hours a week on campus?

-Tasty Nippon, who is very, very broke.

A: Dear Broke,

Talk to your supervisor. When I got permission to work over twenty hours, my department's employment secretary just had to fill out a form and submit it to the employment office. If you're wondering what you specifically have to do to be eligible, BYU's employment website is very vague about what constitutes a good reason for an exception to the twenty-hour rule. Coupled with my experience, this leads me to believe that it's decided on a case-by-case basis, and may depend on your department's willingness to allow you to exceed the limit.

Question #41339 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

dear niffler,

will you please answer this question without bringing up harry potter: what are your thoughts on purchasing hair products at a salon vs a store? thank you.

- bismark

A: Dear bismark,

No I will not.

But I will answer your question. Let's compare:

- Salon products: Just before the Yule Ball, Hermione put Sleekeazy's Potion in her hair. It made such a difference to her bushy hair that Harry did not even recognize her. This is magic indeed.

- Products that can be purchased at any store: Hagrid wanted to impress Madame Maxime so he took axle grease and put it in his hair. The effect was horrifying.

My thoughts? Salon products.

- Niffler
Question #41337 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I've heard that if you grind your own wheat into flour it doesn't have a very long shelf life. Is that true? If so, is there anything you can add to it or do to it to make it last longer?

- Little Red Hen

A: Dear Gertrude,

I remember often watching MOM grind wheat into flour when I was a kid, so I sent her your question to find out what she knew. Here's what she had to say:
Wheat is probably nature's longest storing seed and has been known to be edible after scores of years when stored in a cool dry place. As a general rule for hard grains, hermetically sealed in the absence of oxygen, plan on a storage life of 10-12 years at a stable temperature of 70oF. They should keep proportionately longer if stored at cooler temperatures.
BUT - After seeds are broken (or after the wheat is ground) and their outer shells can no longer protect the seed contents it starts to degrade. Don't try to store unprotected flours longer than a year. If sealed up in air tight bags or other containers, flour may stay edible for about 5 years at a stable temperature of 70oF. It should keep proportionately longer if stored at cooler temperatures.
The best thing to do is only grind as much wheat as you are planning to use.

Love, MOM
I hope that answers your question.

-Kicks and Giggles
Question #41335 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

HYPOTHETICALLY I am an average joe guy with an aversion to housework and less than desirable cleaning skills. For this scenario, my mission burned me out on cleaning domiciles, so I need to seek out a woman for eternal companionship who doesn't mind doing all the housework.
SO, would I have more success pursuing as a mate that cute janitor at the JFSB, with the hope that her doing cleaning work to pay for college will imbue her with a sense of fondness for housework, or that adorable OneStop secretary at the ASB (with no wedding ring) with the idea in mind that she hasn't yet been embittered by spending her college days cleaning up after people, and the hope that she will enter a marriage absolutely itching to do domestic crap like vacuuming and especially doing the dishes?
Aside from this hypothetical bit of chauvinism, I would otherwise make an excellent husband and father.

- I'm just a man, I'm just a man, I'm just a man, I'm just a man

A: Dear Man,

Pick the girl you like best, and get a job that pays you enough to hire a maid.

- Katya
A: Dear Man,

HYPOTHETICALLY speaking of course, I think you would be wisest to just get over your aversion. Clean until you get good at it and love it! Alright, I realize that you'll probably never grow to love it. However, there isn't likely to be a girl on this earth who has any desire to be your maid for the rest of your married life. If you go into marriage with that type of expectation or even hope then I predict that you and your wife are going to have some major issues.

That being said, I would assume that someone who has to clean for their work is even less wanting to then go home and clean. So go with the ASB girl.

-The Cheeky Chickie
A: Dear Man,

Alternately, you could offer to do all of the traditional "guy" chores (mowing, snow shoveling, handyman work, automotive repairs) plus all of the laundry, cooking, diaper changing, nighttime baby feedings, staying home with sick kids and taking them to the doctor and to after school activities for the duration of your marriage, if only she'll do the cleaning. I think that most girls (even burned-out custodial ones) would be willing to take you up on the offer.

- Katya
A: Dear Not So Manly,

Buck up and do some house work. Every woman knows that real men do house work. So I suppose you'll have to pick whichever one you consider to be the most manly since you aren't going to wear the pants in the relationship.

Question #41334 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What is the most interesting thing that you have done for a large serving of your favourite cookies? Right now I am in a race with a friend of mine to see who can attain a significant other, but I'm less interested in the cookies as someone to eat them with . . .

- James Lull

A: Dear Lady Bon Anna,

Offered to eat them? I know. So creative.

A: Dear Jimmy,

I've gone to Walmart at all hours of the night when I needed ingredients.

Yeah, it's just way easier when you know how to make your favorite cookies.

Question #41333 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Boardies,

IN A SIMILAR VEIN, have any of you tried to make gigantic cookies and if so, what is the BIGGEST cookie that you have successfully pulled off?

- Pass a biscuit, wot

A: Dear wot

I recall making a chocolate chip cookie the size of a pizza with Ma Humble when I was a youngster.

-Humble Master
A: Dear I'd rather have a cookie than a biscuit,

I've decided that you can make a cookie as big or small as you want. However, let me warn you that you cannot place a huge ball of cookie dough on a pan and expect it to cook correctly. This will NOT work! (Trust me, I've been there.) The outside cooks and leaves the inside still as doughy as anything. Actually though, it was pretty yummy. If you are the type of person who enjoys cookie dough you might actually want to try this path.

The best way is to spread it out a bit thinly on a pan. I made one that covered an entire cookie sheet and it was very delicious!

A: Dear Topaxi,

My roommate made a giant heart-shaped cookie on a cookie sheet a week or two ago and it took up pretty much the entire cookie sheet. It was so cute! Looked yummy, too. I've never done it myself, though.

Question #41332 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Boardies,

Not counting working for Mrs. Fields or anything commercial, just making cookies for a party or for future breakfasts or whatever, what is the biggest batch of cookies you have ever made? Any hilarious stories?

- Pass a biscuit, wot

A: Dear biscuit,

My brother and I once made about 14 dozen cookies, although I'm not sure if you'd count it as one batch, because we made 5 or 6 different varieties. They were for his Eagle scout project, and it took several hours just to bake them all.

A: Dear Tangerine and biscuit,

14 dozen? pffft! That is so weak. How about 38 dozen? For no other reason than I felt like it. With pictures to boot:



It took me an entire Saturday to do, but it was fun.

-Curious Physics Minor
A: Dear CPM,

I don't know if there's already a patron saint of cookie making, but if not, I nominate you.


-Claudio, who bakes in small batches
Question #41331 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

When you (collectively and individually) make cookies, how much of the dough makes it to the cookie sheet, and how much is consumed throughout the cookie-making process?

- 1:3

A: Dear Stride Wide Man,

Generally when I make cookies it's for the sole purpose of eating the dough. I cook about half of it and keep the other half in the fridge to eat when I feel like it. So good. Especially my cookies and the top secret recipe I have.

A: Dear One Two Three,

Call me crazy, but I'm not actually a big fan of unbaked cookie dough. It probably stems from the fact that my mother makes the best semi-sweet chocolate chip cookies on the planet. We even had a cookie-selling "company" when I was younger, which grew out of our corner lemonade-stand-esque cookie-selling efforts. Seriously. It was big. We grew to the point that we were distributing 25 dozen cookies every week. When you're making that many cookies, you don't have time to stop to eat the dough.

A: Dear one to three,

Probably around around 10%, but I tend to bake kind of boring cookies that taste better baked. (If I made more chocolate chip-type cookies, I'd probably eat more dough.)

- Katya
Question #41329 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What are the best iPod headphones that are reasonably cheap (like under $30). I like the way the ones that came with it fit, but they broke (as in fell apart after years of being friends) today.

The most important qualities, other than price, are, to me, sound quality (especially the bass, but everything overall) and comfort. I primarily listen to classical music, if that means anything. Thanks!

- Now what do I do with my poor old headphones?

A: Dear headphoneless,

Standard Apple iPod earbuds retail for about $35 new. If you go with another brand (JVC, Koss, Sony, Logitech, Jabra, Plantronics, etc), you can find all kinds of alternatives starting at about $9.99. That's fine if you're not willing to spend the money.

I have to say, though, as a nascent audiophile, please don't cheap out on your sound equipment. If you spend less than $30 dollars, there is no way you're going to get any kind of bass, let alone clarity and high fidelity in the rest of the audio spectrum. Heck, earbuds in general are poorly made, hurt the ear, constantly fall out, and offer little in terms of reproduction quality.

My advice: If you can't afford anything good right now, go with ear clips, spark plugs, or a behind the ear model. At least then, you'll have a more convenient solution that won't fall out or hurt your ears.

And if you want quality, and I mean the best of the best at the consumer price level, save your money for a set of Bose headphones. They're expensive because the audio clarity is phenomenal. There's a little try-out kiosk in Cougar Computers if you want to put them to the test. You don't realize what you've been missing until you listening to your favorite piece and discover you can hear the sounds of the solo violist's fingers on the strings of the instrument. If you love music, especially stuff like classical music, they are worth every penny.

Question #41328 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I'm quite fond of candy from outside of the United States (Canadian, and English candy are great, for a start). Besides Mexican candy, I haven't seen too many non-American sweets over here. Is there anywhere to purchase foreign candy in the United States? Preferably in the part of the United States near Provo? If not, what is it that stops stores from selling this stuff? Something legal? Or just little demand? Thanks!

- Nobody's Little Weasel

A: Dear Hotaloga Andrews,

The chocolate in advent calendars is made in Germany. (I would know that.) Mm. So good.

A: Dear Little Weasel,

I recommend that you try Pirate-O's (in Draper, 700 E 11901 S), Many Lands (in Provo, 1145 N 500 W), or the London Market (in Salt Lake City, 563 S 700 E). I've also heard that the Crazzy Canuck (in Provo, 120 W Center Street) carries Canadian candy, but I've never been there to check it out.

Oh, and if you're a fan of Cadbury, plenty of grocery stores carry it. I know Smith's does, and although it's inferior to the stuff that you can get over in Britain (and nobody seems to carry the turkish delight kind), it's still pretty good. And Wal-Mart carries Green & Black's.

As for why more places don't carry delicious non-American goods, I'd guess that it probably comes down to shipping costs. Shipping stuff overseas is not cheap. Not to mention exchange rates. The current exchange rate between the US and Britain is about $2/£1. Even if you go to the UK to buy your British chocolate, one little candy bar will cost you about £0.40-£0.50 ($0.80-$1.00), so you can just imagine how much it costs to buy it and have it shipped over here.


P.S. I am currently in possession of two Kinder eggs, a peanut butter Kit Kat, a Cadbury Crunchie, a bag of Aero mint bubbles, a bag of Minstrels, a package of Caramel McVities, half a package of Trebor mints, and a bottle of Tesco ginger beer, and am now accepting offers.
A: Dear Non-Mustela,

If you're willing to go all the way up to Salt Lake, there's a brilliant little place called British Pantry at 652 S West Temple. They sell all sorts of British food, including (but definitely not limited to) candy bars, Walkers crisps, and rolls of the ever glorious and delectable McVities digestive biscuit. They even have a little tea shop in the back where you can order fresh-made British baked-goods.

Question #41327 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

How does one know when one is in love?

- Green Lisi

A: Dear Colorful:

When you don't have to wonder.

A: Dear Lisi-

According to the Board's title bar of November 11, 2007,
You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.

Now, I thought that was just about the cheesiest thing I ever read, but hey, if it helps...

A: Dear Lisi,

So guess what I get to quote? Diary of a Mad Black Woman. That movie is awfully silly and yet so funny and a great one for quotes. Anyway, Orlando says to the beautiful and hurt Helen the following:
Orlando: Helen, if I'm away from you for more than an hour, I can't stop thinking about you. I carry you in my spirit. I pray for you more than I pray for myself...
Orlando: And see? And that, that smile. Helen, when you smile like that, my world is alright.
Who doesn't want someone to feel that way about them? I'm still waiting for the man who feels that way about me! Because when I do... Well, I suppose I'll get married huh?

Question #41326 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I've been taught in sunday school that heaven is perfect. You're constantly happy there. My question is, is heaven just good, ? Not relatively good, because it's "all good". If everything is good there, does it make everything neutral?

Is this making any sense? My sunday school teacher told me to ask the missionaries. I did, but they couldn't answer it.


A: Hey there, Delilah-

Okay, I deserve severe punishment for that one. I don't even like that song...

If I'm reading you right, I think you're asking "if heaven is good all the time, can we even tell that it's good since we have nothing to compare it to?" I hope that's what you're asking, at least, because that's what I'm going to try to answer.

The fundamental principle here is opposition, which is a key point of Lehi's teachings to his son Jacob in 2 Nephi 2. In part, he states:
11 For it must needs be, that there is an opposition in all things. If not so, my first-born in the wilderness, righteousness could not be brought to pass, neither wickedness, neither holiness nor misery, neither good nor bad. Wherefore, all things must needs be a compound in one; wherefore, if it should be one body it must needs remain as dead, having no life neither death, nor corruption nor incorruption, happiness nor misery, neither sense nor insensibility.
12 Wherefore, it must needs have been created for a thing of naught; wherefore there would have been no purpose in the end of its creation. Wherefore, this thing must needs destroy the wisdom of God and his eternal purposes, and also the power, and the mercy, and the justice of God.
13 And if ye shall say there is no law, ye shall also say there is no sin. If ye shall say there is no sin, ye shall also say there is no righteousness. And if there be no righteousness there be no happiness. And if there be no righteousness nor happiness there be no punishment nor misery. And if these things are not there is no God. And if there is no God we are not, neither the earth; for there could have been no creation of things, neither to act nor to be acted upon; wherefore, all things must have vanished away.

The idea is that without opposites, we have nothing to compare our experiences to. We can't know happiness if we don't know what sadness is like. We can't recognize peace without having felt anxiety or fear. In other words, if you only ate sugar all the time, you would have no clue what sour, or bitter, or spicy things tasted like. You wouldn't even be able to imagine them.

Now, if, perhaps, Heaven was a totally hunky-dory place, it might appear that we fall into the trap of diminishing returns. Our happiness flat lines, because it's expected, normal, and gets old and boring. Right?

I sure hope not! And I don't imagine it that way, either.
For one: This is the point of mortality.
I'm sure you've heard somebody say that we couldn't have progressed any further as spirits in the presence of God. Part of that is because we needed a body, part to be "free agents," and part -- this part -- to experience mortality. I'm betting you have your share of depressing, saddening, or demoralizing experiences in this mortal life, and your question is one of the reasons why. By the time you make it to exaltation (very possibly a long way off, even after death), you'll probably have had enough pain, struggles, and setbacks to appreciate an eternity of happiness. Your mortality, even (or perhaps especially) the tough parts, is an essential part of your becoming Godlike.

And that leads us to our next point. I'm not sure I've heard prophets say that heaven is exactly all "happy" or "good." Rather, we are promised joy, which is a much trickier business. People hear joy and assume total bliss. And that's a part of it. But joy is a very complex, intricate thing.

We are, indeed, promised a fulness of joy, just as Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ possess (3 Nephi 28:10). Yet in the scriptures we also are shown multiple scenes of apparent non-happiness on God's part. One of these is in Moses 7, perhaps one of the most touching passages in scripture. Here, in vision, Enoch sees the Lord weep. He's just as perplexed as you are: "And Enoch said unto the Lord: How is it that thou canst weep, seeing thou art holy, and from all eternity to all eternity?" If God is perfect, why is he sad?
32 The Lord said unto Enoch: Behold these thy brethren; they are the workmanship of mine own hands, and I gave unto them their knowledge, in the day I created them; and in the Garden of Eden, gave I unto man his agency;
33 And unto thy brethren have I said, and also given commandment, that they should love one another, and that they should choose me, their Father; but behold, they are without affection, and they hate their own blood;
34 And the fire of mine indignation is kindled against them; and in my hot displeasure will I send in the floods upon them, for my fierce anger is kindled against them.
35 Behold, I am God; Man of Holiness is my name; Man of Counsel is my name; and Endless and Eternal is my name, also.
36 Wherefore, I can stretch forth mine hands and hold all the creations which I have made; and mine eye can pierce them also, and among all the workmanship of mine hands there has not been so great wickedness as among thy brethren.
37 But behold, their sins shall be upon the heads of their fathers; Satan shall be their father, and misery shall be their doom; and the whole heavens shall weep over them, even all the workmanship of mine hands; wherefore should not the heavens weep, seeing these shall suffer?

God weeps because of the wickedness of His children, and the fact that because of this wickedness, he will very possibly lose some of them forever. I love this scripture for how much it shows God's care and concern over us. To paraphrase the last sentence, why should a father not weep over seeing his children suffer?

Now, back to joy. God has a fullness of joy, yet he also displays other emotions. It is my opinion that joy is more of a state of being than an emotion. It is not an absence of other, negative feelings, but seems to me to be a gigantic bundle of all knowledge, power, love, and grace while still maintaining a real view on the world. God knows the end from the beginning, and I imagine that there is great comfort in His infinite knowledge. Yet he also sees and feels the loss of his children. Perhaps joy is related to knowing everything will work out, who knows? Whatever it is, Joy is not a static experience.

I wish I could more adequately express my views on the matter. It feels like it's right on the tip of my tongue, but the topic is also probably too much for words to describe. One thing that helped me gain some perspective and which came to mind when I read this question is this segment of Orson Scott Card's Shadow of the Hegemon. Read through to page 187. Plus, Orson Scott Card is a Mormon, so I don't think the application here is meant to be a stretch.

In any case, back to the original question. To me, heaven sounds like an awesome place. Compared to this life, especially, it will be wonderful. I don't worry about it getting bland, boring, or flat-lining in the happiness department, because just as every child of God's adds to his glory, so will we also have the opportunity to have eternal progression, increase, and joy. And that is what life is really all about.

Question #41325 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

When I meet someone with a great personality, even if they are not attractive at first, i develope much envy for them. And eventually find them really beautiful. They just have this glow, and where ever they go, there is a wonderful atmosphere that they bring with them.

However, many people have asked questions regarding issues with physical attraction towards their partner.

How does it work? If you truely appreciate and like someone, they are just beautiful to you, right?

- Delilah, who believes God created diversity for a reason.

A: Dear Temptress o' Samson:

For me, guys would have to pass a certain threshold of physical attractiveness, but it's the personality that I really fall for. If you think someone is cute, then you'll probably look for positive aspects of their personality; if someone is drop-dead hilarious, witty, and intelligent, then you will start to notice what is beautiful about them. I think these two issues should be complementary, not dichotomous. Also, I don't think being good-looking is all there is to physical attractiveness: if all you're doing is looking at a boyfriend, for example, that's pretty boring.

---Portia, who goes for the Tom Hankses of this world more than the Matt Damons
A: Dear Delilah,

Greek philosophers postulated three types of love: philia, agape, and eros. I think it's fair to theorize that there may be multiple types of beauty, as well.

Philia is often translated as "friendship," because it is the affectionate love between friends. Correspondingly, there is a type of beauty that you see in a friend or someone else that you are fond of.

You've asked why this kind of beauty doesn't always translate into physical attraction. For one thing, if it did, I'd be attracted to all of my beautiful female friends, which I'm not. Even setting aside sexual orientation, I have male friends that I think are wonderful, beautiful people, and I'm still not attracted to them. It's just not the same kind of beauty.

Agape is often equated with charity or Christlike love. This is the type of love that God has for us, and that we came to earth to learn about. I think it's fair to say that God sees beauty in all of His children (and other creations), but, again, this isn't the same thing as the physical attraction. This also isn't the same thing as the first type of beauty and love, because God loves people even if they're annoying or friendless.

Eros is physical love. The dark side of this love is lust, but physical passion can be good and right. Movie stars and swimsuit models typically have the type of beauty that corresponds with this love, but relatively ordinary looking people can also inspire this love in their significant others.

An ideal relationship contains all three types of love: a genuine friendship, a Christlike love that keeps you going even on bad days, and a physical passion that binds you together. Likewise, couples will ideally see all three types of beauty in their partners, but that doesn't mean that they aren't three separate types.

- Katya
Question #41324 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 hour board,

How does wit come about? Confidence? Intelligence? Genetics perhaps?
And what about a sense of humor, and charisma??? I find myself, trying to improve in these areas, and some people are just so natural with these traits. What attracts people to you? Or rather, what do you admire in a person?

-curious jen (I know its a lot of questions, but hey, you have 100 hours)

btw, Uffish Thought, I appreciated your answer. Although I'm not good with criticism, your advice really helped.

A: Dear Jennifer:

Wit: Be well-informed. This is one that is possible to acquire. If you know about a wide range of current events, historical topics, good literature, or quality films, you will likely be able to seamlessly incorporate those elements into your conversation with practice.

Confidence: Put yourself in situations which you might not be comfortable with. Go to an audition for a dance team or a play, even if you don't think you'll make it: after a couple of those, you'll find your confidence increasing. Call up a guy you're interested in and ask him out. Realize that a lot more people probably think you are fun/attractive/cool than you think.

Intelligence: This one seems more innate to me. Intelligence, to me, is the ability to make connections in your brain, to recall information, to process complex problems.

Genetics: Well, when DNA Polymerase attaches to the strand . . . (heh heh)

Sense of humor: I think everyone has a sense of humor. It's a matter of having a good sense of humor. Hang out with people you find funny. Don't try too hard, but match them, to some extent. I had a guy friend that would rate the humor of his statements in his head. Sounds silly, but it might work.

Charisma: This seems to be another inborn one to me. Some people are reserved, and some draw people to them. Don't build an invisible wall around yourself if you don't want to shut people out.

What Is Attractive: All of the above + Compatibility + Physical Attractiveness

What I Admire: Integrity. Being witty without being snide. Being able to laugh at oneself more than at others. A good work ethic. A firm testimony. Looking good without obsessing about your appearance. Being amazingly talented at music, dance, sports, etc. Someone who can learn from their mistakes and retain their unique personality while changing for the better.

A: Dear Jen-

While I think Portia covered the points pretty well, I want to throw in a tidbit. Some personal advice from someone who's pondered these himself. Real insider stuff. I actually, literally use this. And it's probably not completely original, but I invented it for myself, so it was at least independent.

It's called "The Deep Breath of Confidence."

When you sit down in class and the person next to you is attractive (or even if not... that's probably a better way to start, and ramp up to it) and you want to talk to them, but you're too nervous, do the following:
1) Stop your brain, which is likely spinning.
2) Think of one thing to say (usually something like "Hey, how's your day been?" will suffice).
3) Grit your teeth and close your eyes if necessary, and take a deep breath (of confidence!).
4) Say it. Just say it. And say it like you mean it.

Hopefully, the rest will happen from there. It's always the ice breaker that's the hardest.

Like I said, I do this. I learned it on my mission, because walking up to someone on the street and starting a conversation was literally the most frightening thing I could think of (spiders notwithstanding), but I had to do it anyway. And that's where confidence comes in. If you're going to do it anyway, you might as well learn how to do it well. Remember, pretty much everyone else in the world is neurotic, too, and if you simply act like you know what you're doing, people will be down for it. It'll take practice, but you'll see some improvement almost immediately.

Good luck with that. It's tough, but worth it.

Also, to second something Portia said: ask a guy out sometime. Every girl in the world needs to do this.

Question #41323 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Now that the mall that I work at plays Christmas music exclusively, Christmas music has been on my mind. So, why hasn't "Let's Have a Patrick Swayze Christmas" (http://youtube.com/watch?v=2ZyJCV_dyug) become a Christmas standard yet? What needs to be done to propel this Swayziest of songs to mass Christmas popularity?

- Bleser (On behalf of MSTies everywhere)

A: Dear who's better, joel or mike,

This shining jewel in the crown of yuletide anthems ought to be sung from the rooftops all month. Bless you for spreading the love.

A: Dear Cognoscente-

I prefer Mike.

Dear Bleser-

You have, indeed, blesed (sic, I guess) us with this song. In fact, I may love you for sending it to us.

I love MST3K songs.

(Skip to about 3:05 on the last one.)

A: Dear Bleser,

Just give everyone you know a copy of it for Christmas. Then everyone will include it in their Christmas CDs and pull it out every Christmas.

Or just post on the 100 Hour Board about how wonderful it is and include a link so everyone who reads it can go watch. Oh wait...

-The Cheeky Chickie
Question #41304 posted on 12/10/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear Ever Knowledgable 100 Hour Board,

I am an avid reader of the Robert Jordan series The Wheel of Time. Recently I have reread the first book The Eye of The World and I noticed something that seems to be a flaw in the chronology. (to 100 hour board readers: if you haven't read these books this may spoil a portion of the storyline for you. You have been warned) In the 33rd chapter Mat and Rand have just escaped from the four kings inn by way of lightning striking the wall of the room they were locked into which tore a hole in the wall. The begining of the chapter has Rand recovering from an illness and Mat nearly over the blinding he suffered from the flash. Just a few pages in it goes back to them just barely leaving the inn with Mat blind as a bat and Rand starting to get ill. My question is this; did Robert Jordan do this on purpose or is this an editing error that was fixed in later issues? (I have checked with a neighbor and his copy follows the same line). That was a lot of set up for a small question but it has been vexing me for years now and your wisdom in this matter would be most appreciated. Thank you.

- Anonymous

A: Dear Anonymous,

It's not an editing error. Chapters 31 through 34 actually have two flashbacks in them, though they're not very well marked as such. At the end of Chapter 34, you'll read this line: "[Rand] wondered if his whole sense of time was getting skewed." A part of me wonders if Jordan was trying to do the same to the reader.

As for the exact chronology of what's happening, I could try to explain it all out for you, but the WoT FAQ has already done a much better job of this. The Wot FAQ is a collection of all the discussion that has gone on over Usenet about the Wheel of Time series, and if you're looking for any sort of clarification, it's a good place to start. Be warned, though, that you might want to wait until you've read a few more of the books before exploring it too much; they don't bother with marking spoilers. (Though I suppose that warning is more for other readers, since you say you're rereading the first book.)