"When you get a little older, you'll see how easy it is to become lured by the female of the species." - 1960's Batman TV show
Question #41579 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,
RE: Board Question #41447

If you are looking to get far away, New Hampshire has the beautiful White Mountains, Mt. Washington is not only the windiest place on earth, the highest point east of the Mississippi, but has claimed more lives except Mt. Everest. Plus there is hardly any flatlands anywhere, it is all hills and mountains. It rocks.

Its also nice and warm in the summer, and covered with wonderful snow in the winter. And it is all green. Or white in the winter. It rules. And, it is about 2500 miles away from Utah. You could go to Maine, but, it's Maine.

- Basso Continuo

A: Watch it, Mr. Basso. Katya, a person I hold in very high esteem, lives in Maine.

A: Dear BC,

It's true. So don't go dissing Maine, or we'll sic our lobsters on you.

- Katya
Question #41568 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

(So, you know the saying, "It's the best thing since sliced bread"? Can someone tell me what was the best thing before sliced bread? )

- (Queen of Spades)

A: Dear Пиковая дама,

See Board Question #2987, Board Question #6603, and Board Question #15579.

- the librarian
Question #41567 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

After the TV mini-series "Fallen" and it's sequels came out, I became curious in the idea of Fallen Angels. Now my work gets pretty boring sometimes so I read the Wikipedia (which I know isn't alway accurate) and the board to help me get through the long days.
Now that I have prefaced this I will get on with the question. In the apocryphal Book of Enoch (which I did get from the library and read) it says a group of rebellious angels leave heaven and come to earth to marry women (Jude 1:6 mentions this). One theory is that these 'fallen' angels are those who joined with Lucifer and where throne out (this doesn't make sense to me since he/they were cast out before there where mortal women that they could marry). Another is that they where watchers of the Garden of Eden who became vain and joined with women. Their offspring, or Nephilim, where giants and in some sources demons. They are even mentioned in Genesis 6.
My questions is, what is the church standing on this--I suppose we could call it popular stories of medevil times--and in you collective opinions (in the event that you can't find church info) is it just popular stories of the past, this fallen angel stuff, or does it actually have a bit of truth to it?
I just thought where one of the writers actually has a name that means "Angel of Death" or "Assistant to God" in Arabic that you might be able to find some sort of information, that I after 3 months have not been able to find, and may find interesting.
Thank you.

- Janeway

A: Dear Captain,

What an interesting question. It's obvious that you know quite a bit about this. I, having only a few minutes to spare during finals week, do not have the time to learn about things as deeply as you have. However, looking at what you've given me, I can take a shot.

First, a brief statement on the Apocrypha. As stated in D&C Section 91, the Apocryphal books have a lot of truth in them, but also contain many things "that are not true, which are interpolations by the hands of men." As such, it's important to take many of the things they say with a grain of salt, and, as the Lord instructs, to read with the Spirit, which teaches truth.

The specific teaching of the Book of Enoch that you have brought up is one such interpolation by the hands of men. At this point in the history of the world, only God the Father has an immortal physical body. Even Christ, who had not been born on the earth yet, was a spirit. Thus, the idea that there were beings with God that would be able to leave heaven and marry human (physical) women and produce offspring with them is clearly opposed to LDS doctrine.

The reference you point to in Jude is, however, perfectly true. The first estate is referring to the opportunity to come to earth offered in the premortal life. This estate was forfeited by Lucifer and his followers, and as such they were cast out of heaven. They became, in some sense of the word, fallen angels. The more appropriate term would be fallen spirits. They were cast to the earth and dwell here still.

As far as the LDS viewpoint on the Nephilim...well, that I just don't know. They are mentioned in the Bible, as you said, in Genesis 6:1-6, but I don't know really how to take the wording of that scripture. In the King James Version, the verse says that the giants were the children of "the sons of God" and "the daughters of men." The Bible, being written in a patriarchal nature, may more highly revere the position of son in relation to God, calling mortal men (as we do now) the sons of God. We also now refer to mortal women as the daughters of God, but it's possible that to demonstrate the lesser importance of the female role the daughters were referred to as the children of men, not of God. How these unions created giants, I'm still not sure.

Leave it be said: it is not possible for a spirit to father a child (as to how this relates to the parenthood of Jesus Christ, see here (last paragraph on the page)). As the fallen spirits that followed Lucifer were not endowed with physical bodies (indeed, no non-mortal was so endowed until the resurrection of Christ), they did not father children with the women of the earth.

A: Dear Janeway,

You may be interested to know that in the mid-1970s, a 13-part series of articles by Hugh Nibley was published in the Ensign relating specifically to the Apocryphal Book of Enoch and specifically its relation to the tale of Enoch as found in the Pearl of Great Price's Book of Moses.

This is, of course, a large amount of reading, and may be more than you're interested in undertaking at the present time. Luckily for you, however, I've done it for you. In Part 8, Nibley suggests that:
...the sons of God are those who accept and live by the law of God. When "the sons of men" (as Enoch calls them) broke their covenant, they still insisted on that exalted title: "Behold, we are the sons of God; have we not taken unto ourselves the daughters of men?" (Moses 8:21), even as "the sons of men," reversing the order, married the daughters of those "called the sons of God," thereby forfeiting their title, "for," said God to Noah, "they will not hearken to my voice." (Moses 8:15.) The situation was, then, that the sons of God, or their daughters who had been initiated into a spiritual order, departed from it and broke their vows, mingling with those who observed only a carnal law.
Further reading is obviously in order if you're interested. It's important to note that while much of Nibley's understanding of the apocryphal Enoch is informed by Joseph Smith's revelations, these are still simply the informed conjectures of one man on an Apocrypha of which God himself declared "VERILY, thus saith the Lord unto you concerning the Apocrypha—There are many things contained therein that are true, and it is mostly translated correctly; There are many things contained therein that are not true, which are interpolations by the hands of men." (D&C 91) Thus, while it seems that Brother Nibley certainly had a detailed understanding of the material available at the time, his publications have not been accepted as doctrine, and thus do not represent the official position of the Church in any way.

Allow me to thank you for asking such an interesting question. I hope my answer sheds some additional light on the topic.

Question #41566 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

This is pretty random, but I was just thinking about a situation from one of my classes a while back. This is at BYU, by the way.

We had pretty hefty projects in these classes, and it was common for students to pull multiple all-nighters and literally spend days in the labs trying to get things done on time, usually the week before. Leaving school only to eat...man, I don't miss those days.

On the due date for one particular project (it was a Monday), one student approached the professor and said that he did not finish because he couldn't get it all done on Saturday. Finishing it would require him to do homework on Sunday, and he believed that was out of harmony with church teachings.

The professor simply said that he did not interpret church teachings to say that homework was a violation of Sabbath observance, and the student would be deducted for late work.

Who is right?

-Sides with the teacher, but not necessarily his response

A: Dear Sides,

It doesn't matter. The assignment was assigned, and expected to be turned in on time. Assuming the assignment was assigned on a Friday, then not doing it on Sunday makes it equivalent to being assigned on any other day of the week (for most classes): Day Assigned -> Day of no class -> Day assignment is due. The student's argument holds absolutely no water.

A: Dear Sides with the teacher-

Obstreperous though he may be, I'm with werf on this one. And the professor, and you, I suppose. Especially if this is a project given with advance notice and a good amount of time to finish it, the Sabbath is no excuse. I can see someone not wanting to do their work on Sunday, but I'm also willing to bet there were other days it could have been worked on.

It's due when it's due. Doesn't matter if that's right after the Sabbath or not.

Question #41565 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish!

Is there more to that joke than meets the eye? Or is there an extended version? I remember laughing out loud the first time I heard this, but I can't remember if it was the context or the joke in context that was funny. Is that really the whole joke?

-Out of context

A: Dear Out of Context,

As I recall, the beginning of the riddle is "What's the difference between a piano and a fish?" Otherwise, yeah, that's the entire joke.

- Katya
A: Dear Context,

FYI, it's also an album by REO Speedwagon.

...it was the first thing I thought of.

A: Dear Jokester:

The joke relies on internal open juncture ambiguity, for what it's worth.

I once laughed uncontrollably for several minutes at a friend describing the Incredible Hulk going on a rampage in Mafia . . . yeah, I'm betting on the context.

Question #41561 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

So, I have high standards for the boys I date. Really high standards. Some would say too high. But I don't think so. I don't expect any more out of boys than I expect out of myself. Fair enough?

But I got to thinking today...is that necessary? I mean, yeah, all these things are important to me, and I have worked hard to maintain my own personal integrity in these areas for years and years and years. But if a guy watches football on Sundays or swears or does some other thing I would never do, is that such a big deal?

Before, I've always thought, ABSOLUTELY THAT IS A BIG DEAL! My reasoning? It's more of a follow-the-prophet attitude that I'm looking for than a do-not-do list. But if the prophet says do not do this, I would expect that you do not do that!

But all of a sudden, I was talking to someone who gave me a crazy new perspective. Is that really necessary? I mean, the end goal is a celestial marriage, right? Is the NFL going to prevent him from getting a celestial glory? Are a few anger-releasing words going to send him to a lower kingdom? Is his influence going to turn me into someone who was blinded by the craftiness of men?

Honestly, I don't quite know what to think. I almost feel like I'm sacrificing my own character if I go after someone with, in my mind, sub-par standards. So I'm asking you, what do you think?

-Looking for Mr. Right

A: Hey, Baby-

I don't swear and I don't even like football, much less on Sundays.

How YOU doin'?

A: Dear Looking,

It sounds like your standards for yourself and others are based on very sound gospel principles, but maybe you need to be more flexible in terms of allowing for other ways of interpreting and implementing those rules.

For instance, it seems to me that your "no football on Sundays" rule is primarily based on the commandment of keeping the Sabbath day holy, with maybe a dash of "pay attention to your family instead of just watching sports all day." Likewise, your rule against swearing is based on having respect for the people around you (who don't want to hear that language), respect for the power of language (in terms of not misusing it), and respect and honor for God (in terms of not treating His name and other sacred things lightly).

However, what if you met a guy who only watched football if his home teaching and other Church responsibilities were taken care of and who stayed in a suit and tie (with a white shirt) all day on Sundays? Or what if you met a guy who only watched a few of the "big" Sunday football games every year?

Or what if you met a guy who'd grown up around a more rough crowd and who was trying really hard to clean up his language, but who still slipped up once in a while?

The point I'm trying to make is that you can't expect to find someone who's going to perfectly conform to your extensive laundry list of rules for living. That doesn't mean that you should completely toss out your standards, either, but that you need to be willing to go back to more basic principles and renegotiate what the day-to-day expression of those principles might look like. After all, marriage is not about finding the person who meets all of your exacting requirements, but about constant negotiation with someone who is a bascially good person, but also very different from you.

- Katya
Question #41558 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

When is the Provo Temple baptistry not very busy?

-Busy Baptizer

A: Dear Busy,

Early afternoon weekdays are usually ok. There are many stakes/youth groups that go through and can extend your time much much longer. 5pm on Saturday is a no-no. 7AM Saturday is just perfect.

The best time is during BYU football games.

A: Dear BB,

See also Board Question #20356.

- the librarian
Question #41557 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

In my experience as an LDS high school student, college student, and friend, I have come across a problem that never seems to go away. How do you get away from the self-righteous label that people so readily stick on you?

High school: You're a Mormon and you won't drink or have sex. You won't support my homosexual lifestyle or watch porn. So what, you think you're better than us or something?

College: You won't watch R-rated movies? So I guess you're not coming to my movie party then? So you're above all that, huh prude? Too good to watch a movie.

Friend: You don't like my friend who's compromised my integrity? You don't want to hang out with us because we do "bad things" all the time...why don't you come off your high-horse already?

I don't know how it keeps happening. Honestly, most of the time I don't even say anything rude to these people. Or I don't say anything at all! You ask me to come do something that I don't want to, I decline. End of story, right? No! People make it into such a huge deal. Not coming to your party does not mean I hate you. In fact, I quite like you. Sometimes I go to great lengths to make you understand the concept that I like you. I'm just sick of being called conceited and cocky and self-righteous because I'm trying to maintain my own personal integrity. I don't really care what you do, just don't expect me to do it.

Is that conceited? Is there a better way to approach it? We're supposed to be nice and friendly to everyone, right? But eventually, if you get friendly enough, they want you to come do things with them. And then you turn them down, and it's like it's the end of the world.

-Unhappy Face

A: Dear Unhappy,

Perhaps you are acting holier-than-thou. My friends in high school respected my decisions, and I didn't judge them for theirs'. I was never accused of being self-righteous, at least not to my face.

A: Dear George,

My experiences have been the same as obstreperous's. Just don't say anything about those issues that friends and acquaintances get upset about, and if you don't want to do something, just say "Ah, no thanks. I'm alright."

-Kicks and Giggles
A: Dear,

In my experience, it takes people a while to grow up. Some people never do. But it'll be harder in high school than it is in college, and harder in college than it is in the rest of the world. If I were you, I'd look for people who are a little more supportive of you and your lifestyle. I can't tell you exactly what tack to take with your friends now, because I don't know in what spirit either of you is presenting your side. Still, I can take a stab at it.

High school and College: You're right, I don't do any of those things, but it's not because I think I'm really good. The reason I don't is because I know I'm not perfect, and I worry that if I got too comfortable with [questionable activity] I'd start to think it was normal, and my life would reflect that. I really respect people who are [virtue like "faithful to their spouse" or "in control of themselves"] and that's what I'd like to be like. It's not that I think I'm better than you at all, it's that I worry I don't have the self-control you do, and if I'm not very careful, my life will end up somewhere I don't want it. So, thanks for the invite, but I really shouldn't go. But that reminds me--I'm doing [awesome activity] on Saturday--you should come. It's going to be great.

Friend: I'm sorry I said those things about your friends and what you do when you hang out. It's really none of my business. But I hope you understand my commitment to my own personal religion and set of standards, and aren't too offended when I sometimes find other things to do. I don't think that you're going to hell, or anything, but there are some things I'd like to be especially careful of, and so sometimes I have to miss out on whatever you're doing. It's not always fun, but I think it's best for me, right now.

To be honest, I have to agree with the other writers, a little. If you're telling your friend that you don't like their friends, and that they do "bad stuff," even if you're not going into specifics or being especially rude, you're still being pretty judgmental, and they're just returning the favor. A "no thanks, I don't think I'll be there, this time" should suffice. If they press for details, you can say "actually, I'm not a big fan of R-rated movies--they've usually got more sex/violence/language than I'm comfortable with." How did the homosexual thing even come up? Did some guy say "I'm going to go spend some time with my boyfriend," and you said "I can't support that?" I'm just not seeing a situation where you need to be condemning people for that, or where your opinion would be required.

If I've read you wrong, and you're just as respectful of other people's choices as you'd like them to be of yours, even when they don't match up with your personal moral compass, then I'm very sorry that you've been so unfairly blamed. Remember, if they press you for details, to be very diplomatic, and to make sure that they understand that you don't think less of them for not living your own particular lifestyle.

I'd suggest you plan lots of your own events, and invite people to them. Go to what you can, and don't make a big deal of it when you can't. And if you can, make some friends who either have similar standards, or who don't mind when you skip out from time to time. That will make things worlds easier.

-Uffish Thought
Question #41554 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I had a really strange encounter with a guy at work today. I've never seen him before (I'm new), and the first time I really laid eyes on him, he said something like, "and SHE hasn't even introduced herself to me yet!"

I wasn't sure if I was supposed to know him already, or what the deal was...I later found out that we only overlap one shift, and he may not have even been there last time. So this is probably our first meeting.

Maybe an hour passes, and he comes over and asks me to tell him something about myself. Not knowing quite what to say, I told him where I'm from and then asked, "so what's your story?" He said that he had no story and quickly left the room.

Later on, he comes in and sits down next to me and asks about every detail of my life--everything from what I like to do to high school ambitions to dating life to why I don't invite people to come over to my house more often since I live in such a spacious place. Which is...fine I guess? I kept trying to interject questions for him here and there, but they always came right back to me. So after an extensive discussion of my dating life and why I'm not married yet (I'm 20, for heavens sake), I asked him if he had any diagnosis for why I was not married. A death trap? Maybe. I just wanted to know what sort of weird impression he was getting of me. He said he had some guesses, but that he didn't ever share those. Then he said goodbye and walked away.

I have no idea what to make of this kid. Absolutely none, whatsoever. And for some reason, even though I was just trying to be friendly, I feel like I came off as cocky and pessimistic. But I don't really think of myself as cocky or pessimistic...so my questions are these:

What's the deal with this guy?
How do I know if I'm cocky and pessimistic?

Part of what bothers me is that there are things I didn't tell him...for example, maybe the reason I don't have people over very often is because nobody comes when I invite them. I invited at least 30 people to my last party, and how many showed? Three. It's not that I live in some great and spacious building, hoarding the whole place to myself...I try really hard to get out and have a social life. Really hard. And I'm not an outgoing person, so it's not exactly easy for me.

Anyway, sorry for that little tangent. I don't know...I guess I'm just frustrated with the whole first impression deal. He doesn't even know me at all, but some of his more pointed questions made it feel like an interrogation.

-Cops and robbers is no fun in real life

A: Dear,

Yes, that sounds a little odd. And it makes me wonder if I've met the guy you work with.

Anyway, this is what I suggest. Next time he starts quizzing you, laugh, and say you refuse to tell him anything more about you until you hear more about him. Be friendly, but firm. Remember that he has no right the the information he's asking for, and he's being nosy and rude, if you're not comfortable. Another good thing to say (still smiling, and laughing, so you don't come off as mean, but firmly, and possibly repeatedly) would be "Oh, come on, that's none of your business. Let's lay off of my personal life."

The deal with this guy is that he's socially awkward. He's taken the "be interested in other people and don't talk about yourself too much" to extremes, and he's not observing the niceties of increased privileges of friendship with time and trust. He's jumping in with both feet, and acting like you have a connection that's not there.

You may or may not be cocky and pessimistic, but it hardly matters here. You can find out by asking trusted and honest friends, and by doing a lot of soul-searching.

I think you were absolutely right not to share your activity-planning woes. It's an unfortunate situation, but telling him won't help anything, and it would make you sound desperate and friendless, when I doubt you really are.

(If you want to get more people to your parties, by the way, sometimes a bunch of invites aren't enough. Try involving more people in the planning, sending out real paper-and-ink invitations, having some kind of food, and a purpose to the party-whether it's a movie or games or to dress up or whatever. Let people know 2-4 weeks ahead of time, and don't say things like "let's get a lot of people here, this time," say "this party is going to be so cool, you'll kick yourself if you miss it." Remind people when you see them, but don't bring it up so frequently that they think you're worried you won't get many people. No one wants to come to a party where there's no one else, and nothing to do but stare at each other. If you're confident in your planning and advertising, they'll be more likely to assume that you've set up something so cool you don't really have to worry about numbers or things to do. A lot is in how you market it.)

No worries with this kid. He's the one who should be feeling like he made an awkward impression, not you. For you, remember that you don't have to answer his questions, and that if you point out what he's doing to him, he might realize and back off, a little. There will be other impressions other than the first to hit things off better. And if you never do, remember that not everyone will always like you, and that's all right. Be polite, but don't feel bad because some guy at work is a little odd. The world will still turn, and you will still have rockin' parties.

-Uffish Thought
Question #41553 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I know you're not doctors, but is ADD often accompanied by depression? Specifically, if a kid is diagnosed with ADD (or ADHD, I can't remember what he said) when he was really young, like 5 years old, but never sought treatment or medication would it be accompanied by his being super depressed at times? I have a friend who is wild and crazy and he recently confided in me (and allowed me to confide in you) that he was diagnosed with ADD as a wee pup but never did anything about it. He has since developed a strong dislike for medicine and if he were prescribed medication, he wouldn't take it anyway. Conversely, he won't talk to a doctor about depression because he doesn't want them to prescribe medication that he won't take. He alternates between fits of absolute hilarity and fun to unbearable moroseness, is this usual?

- self-diagnosis runs in his family

A: Dear Self-diagnoser's Friend-

Correct. We are not doctors. I'm not even particularly well-informed about a lot of things, especially on the mental health side.

If I had to guess, though? Maybe bipolar disorder. He probably should see a counselor of some kind. If you're at BYU, it's even free!

We wish you and your friend well.

A: Dear Silicarous,

I'm with Foreman on this answer. From the way you describe it, it sounds like bipolar, which is often times misdiagnosed as ADD/ADHD.

Question #41551 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

You've probably answered this before, but I searched and couldn't find it, so I apologize in advance. I'm just wondering--if I graduated from BYU in August, could I still go on campus to a computer lab and log on using my netID and password? Or are they out of the system since I'm no longer a student and haven't been for awhile? Thanks!

-Ernest P. Worrell

A: Dear Ernest ~

I also graduated in August. Yay for us! I can no longer log into campus computers with my net id and password. However, I can still log into Route Y. Which is nice, especially writing for the Board. I assume your access rights would be the same.

~ Dragon Lady
Question #41546 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,
A little while back, I was doing an informal poll to test my hypothesis that 95% of all girls like 5% of the guys in my ward and 95% of all guys like 5% of the girls in my ward. I asked guys and girls two questions:

1) Who are the top 5 dateable guys?
2) Who are the top 5 dateable girls?

Both questions were given to both sexes so that girls could sound off on which girls they thought were getting all the dates and vice versa. An interesting phenomenon occurred. Everyone I asked (whether guy or girl) agreed roughly on the top 7 guys in the ward. (and I don't think it was merely a coincidence that they were the tall, handsome, well built guys). Some guys were quite clearly the Big Cheese in the ward because everyone chose them first.

However, the girls were all over the map. No clear leaders, there was maybe one girl that all the girls thought was getting all the dates. But other than that, almost no one agreed on a top 5-10 girls. It was so strange.

Any brilliant thoughts on why this occurred?

Love always,
Your Babooshka

A: My babooshka,

Sounds to me like the girls in your ward oughta lower their standards if they want dates.

A: Dear Babooshka,

Your study is interesting, but I don't think there's much we can do with it unless we have data from other wards, too. (Then we could start looking at whether this is a general trend in BYU singles' wards or whether your ward is somehow unique.) Anything else would be pure speculation, which I have little patience for these days.

However, if you want to round up friends in other wards to help you out (or if we want to get the members of The Board Message Board involved), I'd be interested to see the results.

- Katya
Question #41545 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I have been wondering how one would go about becoming more punctual. Do you have any advice or tips that might be helpful in getting to where I need to be when I need to be there, particularly to work? I have always struggled with being on time, but it's something that has got to be possible to conquer!

- Gonna get fired!

A: Dear Gonna

Make it ten minutes early your "on time." Always try to be there ten minutes early. If you're a few minutes late, you're still on time. If you're on time you get ten minutes of your own time. Win-win if you ask me.

-Humble Master
A: Dear,

Try setting your clocks so they reflect the extra time, as well. Even when I know they're wrong, I tend to be a little more on the ball when my clocks are fast.

-Uffish Thought
Question #41542 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

How can I finally put an end to The Burninator? I seek revenge!!!

Rather Dashing

A: Dear Rather Doll,

Why would you want to hurt others?

A: Dear Rather Dashing,

Well, you're going to need three things. You need to smell like a peasant, you need to dress like a peasant, and you certainly need to be on fire like a peasant. And then you'll need a sword, methinks.

Question #41541 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Are there any acceptable, non-creepy-type ways for a cute boy to strike up a converstion with a cute girl with whom he has absolutely no prior connection? This counts mutual friends, classes (even if they didn't talk), parent's distant friend's estranged family... Ok, maybe that last one's ok. But you get my gist. Also, what kind of situations work for this (besides parties, dances, etc.)? I can guess obviously not while she's talking to someone else, but are there other things that one might do during daytime in public which should absolutely never be inturrupted by a stranger with a quick wit and a dashing smile?

Um... Nevermind about the quick wit...

A: Dear,

Maybe I'm hard to creep out, but I'm fine with you just pausing as you pass them, and saying "hey, I think I remember you from ________. What was your name? I'm SloWit. Gosh, that ________ was really something, huh?" Chat a little, and if it gets awkward, move on, if it's not too bad, keep chatting. This works basically anywhere you're both at, and talking is permitted. Starting a conversation (even with a stranger!) isn't a forbidden thing, not matter what gender you're talking to. Sure, it may be a little intimidating to do, but the other person doesn't know that, they're assuming you're just a friendly outgoing person who does it all the time. Or at least, they'll assume it if you act like it's a casual thing, and not a creepy come-on. And watch--if they're looking like they feel uncomfortable with being approached by a veritable stranger, or just busy with what they were doing, say it was good to see them/meet them, and take off. But if they set aside what they were up to and look interested in chatting for a bit, try to get a good conversation going, and have fun with your new friend.

You should not do this if she's placing the last card on an elaborate stacked house of cards.
Or in the middle of a freestyle rap battle.
Or kissing someone.
Or just a couple seconds away from Nirvana.
Or weeping bitterly.
Or frothing at the mouth.
Or looking desperate and holding a machine gun.
Or sleeping.
Or being tended to by paramedics.
Or under a vow of silence.
Or in such a hurry her legs are all wheeled up like the Road Runner.
Or at the pivotal point in a suspenseful film.
Or performing open-heart surgery.
Or praying.
Or having a duel.
Or lecturing the local wildlife on the importance of clean living.
Or dealing drugs.
Or doing the gallon challenge.
Or trying to sell real Rolex watches for a dollar each.
Or impersonating Elvis.
Or running from a hive of bees, or worse yet, covered in bees.

-songs of inexperience
A: nevermind -

the above responses are sound, but don't be too surprised if she ends up thinking you're a little creepy anyway. you don't mean any harm, but there are enough weird people out there that she's justified in exercising caution. don't expect anyone to read your mind.


- ghost
Question #41540 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What frowned upon and/or morally questionable job do you think would be fun to have and why? (Examples: a thief that steals from the rich to give to the poor, a wine taster, etc.)

- Felastizairu

A: Dear fela,

How about a wine thief? Ha ha!

I think being a bartender would be pretty cool. You're the master of your bar, you're cool and sober, you're everybody's friend... and hey, knowing how to mix dozens of interesting drinks off the top of your head is awesome! It's like modern-day alchemy!

A: Dear airu,

Yeah. I would totally be a bartender. Not, like, the girl who serves beer from behind the crappy bar, but the person serving from one of those hot jazz clubs or something.

A: Dear tiza,

Hit man. You get to practice CIA tactics, meet new people, experience a high-intensity job, try out new military technology, make a lot of money and, above all, work in a high-demand field. Job security! There are always going to be those dirty politicians who just need to go.

-You, the Reader
A: Dear Polish-looking name:

A lawyer. Don't even try to tell me that some people don't frown upon that one.

A: Dear Felastizairu,

I have always always for as long as I can remember wanted to work with racehorses at a racetrack. I've worked with them on a farm, but always dreamed of getting to the track someday.

Question #41539 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Why are people with an interest in politics considered thoughtful intellectuals while people with an interest in Hollywood celebrities are considered stupid lemmings? Aren't both interests just different forms of people-watching?

- A People-Watcher (I'll let you guess which kind)

A: Dear People-Watcher-

Well, I would have to say that it's because politics can actually have a bearing on your life as a whole. Politicians create policy, which governs how you live your life. I think that's a tad more applicable than knowing who is dating who in Hollywood. The actor in an upcoming movie isn't voting on a bill that will turn that national park near your house into a subdivision, you know?

That being said, I think the media obsession over every niggling detail of politician's lives and interactions is just a way for networks to play off of the drama-addicted American culture. In that sense, the two are probably about the same, just that they play off of the "intellectual" angle to make it seem more acceptable to those people who would watch politics anyway. That, or the media is trying to widen the appeal of their sphere (usually politics) to those who normally wouldn't watch (people who just want conflict/entertainment) to up the ratings.

So, in brief: the problem doesn't come from following politics, it comes from being too obsessed over politicians.

That's how I see it, at least.

Question #41538 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Has anyone ever tried to become a pseudo-board writer by posting comments in response to an unusually large number of questions? Would you stop them if they did (by not posting the comments)?

- The Economizer

A: Dear The Economizer,

I don't know if anyone has ever actually consciously tried to do so, but that is one of the reasons that we heavily moderate the comments we post. Writing for the Board requires a commitment, and readers who have comments posting all the time would in effect have most of the benefits and none of the responsibilities associated with writing for the Board. Or course, we're happy to post comments correcting us when we're genuinely and documentably wrong, and if a reader were consistently finding better answers than our own, we might encourage them to apply for writership.

But to answer your question, yes, we would probably delete many of the comments. We actually choose not to post comments fairly regularly; I'd guess that at least 30% of our submitted comments are not posted for one reason or another, so it wouldn't be out of the ordinary to reject a few more.

Question #41537 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

If I have a final through the testing center but it is being administered in the Wilk or the JSB, do I need to go to the testing center at all, or do I just go to the actual testing site for everything?

- confused

A: Dear confused,

No, you don't need to go to the Testing Center if your test is scheduled in the Wilk or the JSB. The Wilk and the JSB are just extensions of the Testing Center during finals, and they have everything that's needed at each location. They'll be able to give you your test and print your bubble sheet right there, and you'll turn it in again right there before you leave.

Good luck with finals.

Question #41536 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear Katya,
What is the NOC? I have tried to find it from a BYU map and searching the archives to no avail.
- Ignoramus

A: Dear Ignoramus,

Ha, of course you'll not find the NOC on any public map. We keep that place a secret. And I'll back up Katya's source, it is a cool place. I worked there for 2 and a half years. As to what it is: doing a quick Google on "define: NOC" will provide you your answer.

-Curious Physics Minor
A: Dear Iggy,

Yeah, it's not on any map. I only know that it exists because of friends who used to work there.

- Katya
Question #41535 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear Geniuses,

I was doing some R rated movie search, and I came across a reference to a good article, but the link doesn't work anymore. Can you find the text of the article written in the sunstone about r rated movies? Here is a link to the question, the Orson Scott Card article works fine, but the other one doesn't.

Board Question #10142

A: Dear Reader,

I don't know why the file is missing (since other active pages still point to it) but here's an HTML cached copy (which may only work in Firefox).

- Katya
Question #41532 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board regarding Board Question #41413,

This can't be happening. It is not in CATS' nature to do something so sane, even if there is brainwashing involved. 100 Typing Monkeys, I fear that CATS will try to take another monkey despite all of your "friendship" sessions. Stay on your guard!

- Monkeys shall conquer the Earth and then those evil scientists will have to type all day long!

A: Dear Sir,

I'm not exactly sure what you're talking about. I have taken all the monkeys out to lunch a couple of times in gratitude for their benevolence. You fear that I will take another out to lunch? I'm so confused.

I, CATS, would never do anything to hurt my friends, especially 100 Typing Monkeys. That would be so vile and base. All of it just seems so wrong! I don't know why you say it is not in my nature to be.. nice?

Friend, if I may call you so, I am not mad at your writing. I wish, though, that you would not make accusations without proof. I have no harmful intentions. Time will make it known.

A: Dear Yes We Shall,

We understand your concern, friend. Especially in light of CATS past behavior. But, let us put your mind at ease and assure so that you may rest assured with confidence that CATS has changed. CATS is now kind and capable of speaking coherently. And he gives us gifts. CATS has been made to see the light and logic of understanding, and will forever be a friend of the monkeys.

-100 Typing Monkeys
Question #41531 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Why didn't you answer my question?

- Elizabeth

A: Patience, Grasshopper,

Finals is a busy time for us, too, and sometimes it's hard to rustle up a source who knows the answer. We try for 100 hours, but when we don't quite make it, it doesn't mean we hate you. It means we're putting a little extra effort in.

-Uffish Thought
A: Hey Lizzie,

'Cuz I hate you.

Don't cross me.

Double White Lines
Question #41529 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

If I were to make a 200 hour board, would you help me? I would give you all the credit.

- Ahem.

A: Dear Ahem.,

Are you kidding? We've got enough work as it is!

That said... uh... have fun!

Question #41526 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

My friend recently uncovered the Epstein-Barr virus in his system. Fortunately, I also learned of another friend with the self-same nucleosis. I think they should be friends. In fact all carriers past and present should be friends. Not so much for vengeful or blame-enacting purposes as for the facilitation of new "friendships". Are you aware of any such group at BYU in existence? Or how would you best recommend the starting of such society? For privacy sake we think it would be best kept somewhat secretive and exclusive. And before anyone mounts any high-horses - let's please dispense of any silly stigmas associated with said condition. It's not just from kissing.

- monotone

A: Dear monotone,

For those of you who would like to know more abou the Epstein-Barr virus, please visit the CDC website. Many of you will know it as the agent that can cause mono. And, just for the record, while the virus can be passed in the air or through blood transfusion, it is fairly unlikely. Almost all infections come from swapping saliva and I highly doubt the existence of such a society, as you call it, at BYU. (My neighbor swears she got infected from a drinking fountain when she went to BYU.) But don't worry, they say 95% of us have been infected to one degree or another. If you are going to do an antibody titer to check for a past infection, you're going to have to let 95% or so of those who are tested into your little club. Not very exclusive, eh? If you wanted to keep it secret you could just invite those who you know have been infected (usually those who have had a heavy infection). How you will tell them you found out and would like them to join your society and keep them from telling all their friends how strange you are is another issue.

- steen
Question #41524 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I was driving near campus today and saw protesters holding a banner that said something to the effect of "Shame on you BYU philanthropies. Labor Dispute." What is the labor dispute the protesters were referencing and what does it have to do with BYU?

- Driving By

A: Dear Driving By,

These people don't give up. The whole "labor dispute" thing has been going on for quite some time - see Board Question #6570.

As for this new "philanthropies" addition, my best guess is that these people are ticked off because BYU is building a new building for LDS Philanthropies. To these protesters, this would mean that BYU is continuing to exploit construction workers, just as they were accused of doing when the original dispute arose.

Question #41523 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What's the best hot chocolate brand?

I prefer Stephens.

-Baby It's Cold Outside...

A: Dear ummm... Baby ~

As much as I love Stephens, I prefer Ovaltine. Mostly because I feel healthier when drinking it. "More Ovaltine, please!" That said, I've mostly only had Stephens this cold season.

Actually...oooohh. My favorite is homemade. Mix 2 tsp. sugar with 1 tsp. cocoa. Add a tiny bit of water. Just enough to make a paste. Fill your cup with milk. Microwave until hot. Typically 60-90 seconds. Mmmmm... Heaven.

~ Dragon Lady
A: Dear baby,

I like Cadbury Drinking Chocolate. But I'm fairly confident that if I ever tried this, it would be my new favourite.

A: Dear Cold Outside,

Between Nestlé, Godiva, and Stephen's, I prefer the latter.

- Katya
A: Dear Dino,

Maybe I'm just missing something, but Stephen's hot chocolate just doesn't taste very good to me. In fact, no matter how much powder I add, it just never satisfies what I'm looking for in a cup of hot chocolate.

I'm with DL. Make your own. I do about the same thing she does, but with a shot of vanilla. Mmmmm. If you need to make more than one cup, just use this recipe.

Ooh, or buy the Abuelita chocolate and make a good cup of Mexican-style hot chocolate. So good.

What's that, you say? You want just a scoopable powder you can mix into hot water? Gotcha covered there too with Claudio's Mom's Deluxe Hot Chocolate Mix (patent pending). It's made as follows:

1 pound of each of the following (or any equal weight proportion):

Powdered sugar
Powdered milk
Non-dairy creamer (in the coffee section)
Nestle Nesquik

Put in a container and shake to combine. Store in an airtight container (ziplock, tupperware, etc). Mix 1/3 of a cup into a mug of hot water. Perfect.


A: Dear Make it worth your while,

I like all kinds of warm and sweet things! My personal favorite for the past two years has been Stephen's Holiday special: Italian Amaretto. It's only $2.68/lb at Walmart. Mmm mmmm mmmm!!! Enjoy!

A: Dear Singer:

I like Stephen's. Even better was some dark hot cocoa I had that was from Seattle, and the best is Hediard (as seen on page 9 in the brown can). Mmm, French chocolate. As an aside, hot cocoa mix is actually a really good thing to bring back from a foreign country. No risk of melting or breaking.

About my senior year, my mom observed that it seemed like hot chocolate was another food group for me. I am a fan.

Question #41521 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Is it possible for one person to receive a spiritual confirmation about something, while someone else receives a different confirmation about the same situation?

HYPOTHETICALLY, let's say that I am dating someone. We are thinking of getting married and we pray about it. He receives the answer "Yes, you should marry her" while I receive the answer "No, you should not marry him". Is this possible, or would one of us be receiving the wrong answer?

Thank You,
Just Me

A: Dear You:

Yes, I think that is entirely possible. Hard, but definitely not unreasonable. It's called personal revelation for a reason. As Katya said once, "the answers can be very wide-ranging, from 'yes, this is the specific person you are supposed to marry' to 'this choice is up to you.'" (Read the whole answer. It's excellent.)

I don't think that this situation means either of you did anything wrong. I think it simply means that you are one girl he could be happy with, but that it's not the best decision for you. Also, there is a difference between "no" and "not now." If it's the latter, hopefully he would be willing to wait till the right time. Remember, though: God can see the big picture. Sometimes, even in matters as important as marriage, you might get no answer; but as Elder Scott reminded us, that doesn't mean it won't come.

A: just you -

this might just be me, but i think you put too much stock in "the answer" theory of marriage. don't wait for the heavens to part and your answer to be given to you on a silver platter. more often than not, your answer will be something along the lines of "you know, i'm going to leave this one up to you." that's not to say that very specific revelation telling you who you need to marry can't possibly happen, but i'll go out on a limb and say that it happens in far less than one percent of cases.

here's what i'd recommend: do your homework first, then ask. take some time to think about the person you want to marry. do you like spending time with this person? is there more to your relationship than simply physical attraction? do you feel happy with this person? have you seen them in more emotional states than just "happy"? once you've thought these through, make a preliminary decision. then ask if you've made the right one.

just a thought.

- ghost
Question #41520 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

This is more of a comment than a question:

Since you are the 100 Hour Board I thought it fit to share this news story with you:

"Man freed after 100 hours trapped in a lavatory"


- William

A: Dear William,

All I can say is I now feel really sorry for the questions in our inbox. They must feel something like this poor man, being trapped for 100 long hours in the small, uninteresting confines of our limited-access corner of the internet. How they dream of the day when the inbox door will at last swing open - when they will be freed - posted for all the world to read.

Of course, our inbox doesn't have weird, red toilet paper like this lavatory apparently did, so maybe our questions are better off after all.

Question #41519 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I'm a BYU operator. What's so fascinating about us?

- 4224636

A: Dear 4224636

You are like the Oracles of Delphi.

-100 Typing Monkeys and Friend
A: Dear 422-INFO,

Nothing much these days. I remember the good ole days where I could call in and say/ask anything to the BYU Operators. The past few times I've called with random questions they haven't been too happy with me. You should have a talkin' to with those sticks in the mud.


Mystery breeds intrigue. You won't give out your last names or say where you work and you have access to secret databases. What's not to find fascinating?

- Katya
Question #41518 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What causes that swell cleft in one's chin like Gaston?


A: Dear Le

Ah, the magical wonderment of Wikipedia:<Quote>The groove of the cleft chin is not just skin-deep, but also on the jawbone, as a groove in the vertical midline of symphysis menti and the soft tissue above it. It is probably the result of incomplete fusion between the left and right halves of the lower jaw during embryologic development.Though, oddly, that information was in the dimple article, the cleft chin article simply says its genetic, which isn't terribly helpful.

-Humble Master
Question #41517 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I understand that you prefer not to answer my kind of question...but I am desperate. I don't know where else to turn and I am running out of time.

Does anyone know where to find a polyester BYU tie?? It must be polyester...it's all that my husband wears...

- Waited-'til-the-last-minute

A: Dear Waited,

It's not that we're meanies who refuse to answer these types of questions, it's that we generally don't have any more resources or knowledge at hand than you do.

After searching several sources, I have not found any BYU ties that weren't silk. I can't even find any blue and white striped ties (that you could conceivably pass of as BYU ties) that aren't silk.

Best of luck, and I hope your entire Christmas isn't riding on this. (Also, watch for comments in case one of our astute readers knows of a source.)

- Katya
Question #41514 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Whats a good recipe or secret for fluffy cookies? My cookies come out of the oven fluffy and then go flat while they are cooling! I made cookies at my leaders house one time with them and other people, and they turned out fluffy. Then I used the same recipe at my house and they turned out flat. I know baking soda makes them fluffy, but then they just end up pancakes still. I've tried baking the cookies longer so they'd cook into the right shape but then they just turned out really crispy and flat. Maybe quality's the issue?

- Queen Lucy Pevensie

A: Dear Queen Lucy,

I owe all I know about cooking to three sources:

1. Mom
2. Experience
3. Alton Brown's "Good Eats" on the Food Network

I will be drawing upon the final item for this question, as my cookies aren't puffy (not my taste).

And I quote from the Book of "Good Eats", Season 3, Episode 34 (GE 3:34):
Shortening melts at a higher temperature than butter so it remains solid longer giving the batter time to rise and set before it spreads. Increasing the ratio of brown to white sugar also creates a more tender cookie.
OK, so there are a few things to think about. If you're using butter or margarine, try switching to butter-flavored shortening. It's better for you anyway (though not by much). Further:
The lower protein cake flour will tie up less moisture making it available for steam production. Steam will lift the batter in the oven producing a fluffy, cake-like batter. Switching from baking powder to soda enhances fluffiness by creating an acidic batter which will set quicker and spread less.
All right, so the next step is to take a look at your flour. Flour absorbs moisture according to how much protein is in it. As stated, cake flour has low protein content, which leads to better steam lift. And as you said, baking soda helps too.
Cold dough spreads slowly giving the cookie time to climb before setting. When your batter has thoroughly chilled, it's time to scoop and bake. And by the way, the smaller the scoop the more puff the cookie will have.
There you go. Chill your dough.

For the "puffy recipe" he teaches on this segment, you can go here.

Best of luck in your puff seeking!

Question #41513 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Lets say you are in a bright room with no windows or anything, and it is dark outside. Then you open a door, does it get any darker inside, even by a fraction? I would think that since some of the light is going out side that maybe the light would be less bright/concentrated.

- Lucy Pevensie

A: Dear Lucy Pevensie,

Absolutely. The light that would have reflected off the door and back into the room is now leaving without ever having a chance to hit your eyes.

An easy way to think of this is to imagine that the door is slowly growing along the walls. Obviously, if the door grows to the point that you only have one wall remaining, it's going to be darker in the "room" than when you were surrounded by walls. The question then becomes: Is there some magical point at which the room starts to become darker? If so, what is special about that point? There's no reason why a door of 25 square feet would darken the room while a door of 5 square feet wouldn't; the door certainly isn't suddenly too small for the light to pass through.

So since there's no point at which the light would stop escaping, we can only conclude that so long as there is a hole, some light is escaping from the room.

Question #41511 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear One Hundred Hour Board,

Who first coined the phrase, "Take a chill pill"?

-Mary Jane

A: Dear spidergirl,


-=Optimus Prime=-
Question #41510 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear Foreman,

How should every girl in the world ask you out? Via the board? How should I go about asking you out? Any date you're dying to go on?

- We'll Kiss Someday

A: Dear Maybe If You're Lucky-

Hoo boy... I was wondering when this would happen. And, I'll be honest, looking forward to it a little bit. I am, after all, outstandingly single at the time being (surprising, I know).

I've been thinking about this question myself. Should I follow tradition and create a dating application? Should I be low-key and instruct interested parties to simply e-mail me? As one lucky female reader discovered this weekend, it's not so hard if you know the right people and just ask through the proper channels.

BUT. Since this is the 100 Hour Board, I think something a bit more mysterious is in order. Less direct. More cloak and dagger. And so, I present to you now the Dating Application: Foreman Style.

(I feel this is a fitting picture [despite the poor editing. Hey, I never claimed photo editing skills. It took a few seconds in Paint]. You're with a studly man, I get a hug, and at some point, I'll probably have a gun.)

That's right, ladies, it's going to take more than an application to land a date with this Board Writer. It'll take stealth, intrigue, and genius. There can and will be secret messages, codebreaking, and at least one dead drop.

I'm serious. But it won't be that hard, don't let it scare you off. In fact, it'll be fun. You should WANT to participate. Your mission, should you choose to accept it (you should) is to ask Foreman on a date. Send an e-mail accepting this assignment to foreman(dot)theboard(at)gmail(dot)com to receive further instruction. This message will self-destruct in 100 Hours.

Question #41508 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

For a long time now I've noticed the jobs.byu.edu ad in the plastic stands that sit on most of the HBLL tables. Well, I guess I should say that I've noticed the girl in the ad--you know, the one dressed in reddish-orange, folding her arms. Don't tell me you haven't noticed how attractive she is, and how she does not appear to be wearing a ring.

I would like to meet this girl. Ideally, I would see her on campus one day and say to her, bravely, "Aren't you the girl in that ad in the library?" Then, after a few minutes of conversation, I would ask her out. Unfortunately, I've never had the good fortune of seeing this girl anywhere, and none of my friends know her. So, at the risk of sounding sketchy (which I swear I'm not), I'm wondering if you have any ideas on how I could meet this queen of the library tables. Who knows--perhaps she'd be willing to go on a date with a tall, handsome, gentlemanly guy.

- Smitten

A: smitten -

pretty sure she's fake. she might be pretty, but advertisers tend to go out of their way to pretty up people who might not appear that way normally. as for the lack of a ring, there's a high chance that whomever shot the photos asked her to remove it. the purpose of the ad is to promote byu student employment, not to show off her marital status.

that said, if you still want to give her a shot instead of pursuing someone of a more corporeal nature, you could contact byu employment at student_hire@byu.edu. or contact byu advertising, who probably made the ad, at advertising.byu.edu.


- ghost
Question #41507 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

So I'm changing my major...one of these days. I haven't officially picked a new one yet, so I'm hesitant to declare anything until I'm 100% sure. I'm also hesitant because the college in which I currently reside historically has a fairly low GPA cutoff for scholarships, compared to all the other colleges. Will it hurt me in any way if I stay declared in a major that I am not planning to pursue? Even if I start taking classes for a new major, can I still stay in the old one for a while to increase my chances for scholarship?

-Majorly Undecided

A: Dear Undecided,

I'm hard pressed to think of any drawbacks, except that they don't really like you to declare a new major after your junior year, and if they change any requirements on your new major before you officially declare it, you won't have "locked in" the old ones.

Other than that, go for it.

- Katya
Question #41506 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What's your favorite cookie recipe?

-Chef Girlardee

A: Dear Ur-Gilash,

It's top secret. Seriously, it is. But take my word for it, best chocolate chip cookies EVER!

A: Dear Azriel-

You are hereby challenged to a cookie duel.

Dear Chef-

Also top secret. Also claims to be best chocolate chip cookie recipe ever. What a conundrum for you.

A: Dear Azriel and Foreman,

Fie on you both. My chocolate chip cookie recipe (although top secret...sorry Chef Girlardee) is the heavyweight champion of the world. It floats like a butterfly and stings like a bee.

Or something like that...

In any case, consider me in on the cookie challenge, and prepare for my victory!

A: Dear Chef,

I don't know why all the cookie recipe exclusiveness. In my opinion, the more we circulate the good recipes, the more likely it is that someone will make some for me.

Here's on of my favourites (I don't have any one particular favourite, but this is an awfully good one, and simple):

Russian Tea Cakes

1 cup softened butter
1/2 cup powdered sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla
1/4 teaspoon salt
2 1/4 cups all purpose flour
3/4 cup finely chopped pecans/walnuts/almonds/whatever kind of nut you prefer

In a large bowl combine ingredients on low speed of mixer about 1 minute. Blend well. Gradually add flour at low speed until just combined; stir in nuts. Roll dough into 1 inch balls; place about 1 inch apart on ungreased cookie sheet. Bake at 350 F for 8-10 minutes until firm to the touch but not brown. Do not overbake. While warm, roll in powdered sugar. Cool; re-roll in powdered sugar before serving.

For more cookie recipes from past Board writers, see Board Question #14384, Board Question #5072, Board Question #6973, Board Question #11026, Board Question #20134, Board Question #15961, Board Question #14475, Board Question #14020 and Board Question #6190.



P.S. I don't know why the recipe says to let them cool. They're just as good if you eat them hot.
Question #41503 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What is the best frozen concentrate beverage on the market? The ones I've tried thus far have only been sub-par!

-A poet who is very much aware of her rhyming abilities

A: Dear free verse,

Of course they're sub-par! They're "frozen concentrate beverages." The better ones will be a little less expensive than the most expensive ones. And if you want the best ones, go to a higher-end grocery store and see what they have. If you want good juice, you shouldn't be getting frozen concentrate. If you want great juice, you should squeeze yourself. But since that's not practical for most college students, you'll either have to learn to like the crappy stuff, or go somewhere other than Reams.

-A Slap to Quell the Hysteria
Question #41500 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I can't recall a specific instance in the past few months where the Board writers had an opportunity to comment on their political views. Do any of you like to keep up with politics? And, regardless of whether or not you do or not, who do you support for president and why?

- Political News Junkie

A: Hey junkie,

I'm for whoever Chuck Norris is for. Period.

Don't cross me. Or Chuck.

Double White Lines
A: Dear Junkie-

I semi-follow politics. Usually when it's something important.

That said, the presidential race started ridiculously early, and I'm either cynical or realistic (depending on who you ask) enough to believe that I'm not going to be able to make any appreciable difference this early in the game. None of the candidates are my personal favorite yet, so I'm not going to campaign for anyone, and I have no funds to donate anyway. I don't really see a point in choosing a candidate until the primaries are underway and all the losers drop out. When it gets to the point that there's a final decision to make, I'll invest the time and effort to make one.

I do lean heavily to the right, but all I ask of myself or anyone on either side is to vote for your own personal reasons, not just because of someone's party or religion (cough). As long as people actually think about it, rather than following like sheep, I can live with what comes.

That Chuck Norris ad is sweet, though.

A: Dear junkie,

I love politics, and I've been keeping up on the news for months. I grew up Republican but I've starting thinking more libertarian in the last few years. That said,

I'd vote for Mitt Romney, Ron Paul, or Barack Obama, in that order. I like their character and ideas, and though I disagree with a lot of Obama's policy ideas, I respect and admire him as a capable man with integrity. I like Richardson as well, if only he had a prayer of winning. And so help me, I can't help but like Kucinich. I disagree with him on almost every single issue, but I love his passion and integrity, and he's ability to make fun of himself (he's been on the Colbert Report more than once). Plus he's got a drop-dead gorgeous wife! Hooray for hot first ladies!

I haven't made my mind up about Huckabee yet. I don't agree with him 100%, but he'd be a decent replacement for Romney.

I'd be much more hesitant to vote for Guliani (corrupt), McCain (old and out of touch), Thompson (ill defined by his campaign), Edwards (fake), or any of the other third tier candidates. Character is more important to me in this election than a potential president passing a party orthodoxy test.

I absolutely will not vote for Hillary, under any circumstances. If there was ever a candidate that combined a horrible track record of corruption, an abysmal vision of government, and a frightening personality complex and lack of charisma... it's this woman. ABC, people. Anyone But Clinton. It would be disastrous if she made it past the primaries. Thank heavens, she's slipping in the polls and her once indomitable lead is non-existent now.

My dream would be to see Obama vs. Romney in the general election. Two bright, effective, charismatic, honest men debating the issues. We wouldn't have to vote for the lesser of two evils! Wouldn't THAT be nice?

Question #41499 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I am getting married in April and am looking for a place to have my reception. My fiance and I do not want to have it in a cultural hall, and I am having the hardest time trying to find a place that is reasonable. I have thought of doing it in a park, but you never know what the weather is going to be like. We don't have much money, so I am looking for a place that is cheap. We want to do it around SLC, any ideas? I would really appreciate it! Thanks!

- green eyed girl

A: Dear Green Eyes-

Umm... cultural hall = cheap, climate controlled, and all over Salt Lake City. If you don't want to pony up for a hotel banquet room or risk the weather in the great outdoors, find a friend with a barn/big house, or get over yourselves and go schedule the church building the good old-fashioned way.

Ever hear "beggars can't be choosers?"


PS - Regardless of other arrangements, you should absolutely play that song ("Green Eyes" by Coldplay) at your reception. Just my two cents. You are a rock upon which I stand.
A: green eyed girl -



- ghost
Question #41494 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I noticed that walking traffic on campus often moves at different speeds, like unto currents of water. My question is; are there any studies or statistics that show not only average walking speed, but where people usually walk the fastest?

- 713 left his account open and got a question asked in his name

A: Dear 713, or someone like him,

Robert V. Levine of California State University has published a number of articles relating to the pace of life in various cities and countries. One of the major indicators he has used was the average walking speed. This article, published in 1999, compares the pace of life in 31 countries around the world. He found that pace of life was "fastest in Japan and the countries of Western Europe and was slowest in economically undeveloped countries." Climate, economics, and cultural ideologies also were correlated with pace of life.


Question #41492 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I'm looking for some music. Unfortunately, though I know what it sounds like, that's about it, because the example of style is found embedded in the middle of a song nothing like the bit I enjoy. Two examples of this phenomenon are as follows:

In Disney's Mulan, Mulan is singing the song about how she needs to figure herself out, then it's raining, and suddenly she makes her decision to run away, and when she looks up at the camera a nifty music sequence starts.

In The Single's Ward, there's the bit where Johnathan is in his friends apartment, about to do all that giving up on the church stuff, and he opens the blinds and sees the temple. right when he sees it there's some spiffy guitar (if I'm remembering right).

Is there a way to look for music based on one line excerpts like these?

A huge fan of SOME music

A: Dear fan,

As soon as I finish my Master's Thesis there (hopefully) will be.

-Curious Physics Minor
Question #41491 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I have always envied my peers who have had the opportunity to grow up bilingually. I think those who are bilingual in any language have a huge advantage in education and the work place. (and its just rad)

SO- If you spoke a foreign language and your spouse did not, would you teach it to your children?
Why or why not?

Also, if you and your spouse both spoke different languages ( say you both served in different foreign speaking missions)Would you choose one to teach to your children, or would you teach them both? none?

- Wants to offer her future children the world.

A: Dear Reader,

If my husband and I spoke different language natively, I would definitely raise my children bilingually. For starters, I'm too attached to my mother tongue not to want to share it with my children, and I'm sure that my spouse would be, as well. Also, we'd presumably have monolingual family members on both sides, and I'd want for my kids to be able to communicate with their extended family.

However, if either or both of us had learned second languages, but didn't speak them natively, I probably wouldn't raise my children bilingually.

As I understand it, the most effective way to raise bilingual children is for one parent to speak only in language A while the other parent speaks only in language B. As I said above, I'm very attached to English and I would have a hard time speaking only, say, French to my children, both in terms of not being able to share my love of the English language with them and in terms of the mental effort of constantly speaking in a foreign language. Also, even very competent RMs (and others who speak a foreign language with equivalent fluency) tend to make consistent, if subtle errors in their second language, which would then be passed on to their children, who could grow up speaking a bizarre, slightly creolized version of the language.

Lastly, children who grow up bilingually don't always attain equivalent competency in both languages. Even in countries where almost everyone is bilingual (e.g., in countries where one language is used in business and academia, but many local dialects exist) most people end up with very different vocabularies in those two languages because they've learned them in very different social contexts. Also, if the language spoken at home has a complicated or nonintuitive writing system, children may learn to read and write in their school language, but be functionally illiterate in their home language.

I'm not trying to come across as being down on bilingualism — I agree, it's a pretty cool phenomenon. However, it's actually a lot more complicated than just speaking a language pretty well and wanting to pass that on to your kids.

- Katya

P.S. See also here and here for a two-part Wired magazine story on one man's attempt to raise his son as a bilingual speaker of English and Klingon.
Question #41486 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I know you have determined that an individual can decide for themselves not to see The Golden Compass. However, do you think that ward leaders should tell us not to see it? It was not my ward leaders so I didn't break an commandments by watching it. But it seems to me that there are worse movies out there (i.e. Blades of Glory, Meet the Fockers, Titanic...) which are all PG-13. There just seems to be some inconsistency when stating which movies we should watch and which ones we should not. I saw the movie and it is not atheist. I am reading the books for myself to see what they hold, however the first book so far is not atheist. What are your opinions?

-I am not going to get made at someone who decides not to see it, but will get upset if someone claims I am an apostate for seeing the movie because their Relief Society president told them they shouldn't.

A: Dear Reader,

My feeling is that bishops and stake presidents have the right to counsel their congregations in specific matters such as this, but they will have to be accountable for the way that they exercise their stewardship in such matters.

Likewise, it is our responsibility to carefully weigh the counsel of such authorities, but we are ultimately judged on our own actions and our own understanding of right and wrong, and I think there's danger both in the extremes of following such counsel too blindly and in ignoring everything that doesn't come straight from the prophet.

The fact that not every bishop or stake president is warning against this movie suggests to me that there is no consensus on whether or not it is evil or harmful. However, the fact that some religious leaders are warning against it would give me pause, at least, and cause me to reexamine my criteria for determining what is and isn't uplifting media.

- Katya

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Personally I think one of the greatest sitcoms EVER was The Cosby Show. Although I realize most of you are significantly younger than myself, I'm sure you have seen the reruns. For birthdays and Christmas I have been getting season sets. I truly think the older shows are much better than the new ones - like when Theo goes to college. I love when Clair gets fiesty with her kiddos and Cliff tries to tame her. What is your favorite episode?
- Texas Housewife

A: Dear Texas Housewife,

I'm old enough to have watched The Cosby Show when it was first aired. (I'm a little younger than "Rudi.") I think that my favorite episode was the "battle of the sexes" one where they were arguing about whether or not to hire a stripper for Martin's bachelor party.

- Katya
A: Dear Texas

I have the first four seasons on DVD. Classic stuff. Though I'm still waiting for whatever season has the episode where the men are all pregnant. I vividly recall that one from my childhood. I also enjoy the episode when Theo gets his ear pierced, when Bill and an old college buddy get super-competitive playing a game outdoors in zero degree weather, and the one where the kids all put on a musical performance for their grandparent's anniversary.

Mrs. Master is prone to the episode where Theo is cocky about handling the real world, and he comes back to find his room emptied out and the house converted to the real world. The whole family have roles to play, and Rudy as the mean old lady is classic. She also enjoys the episode where Rudy's goldfish dies, and the scene when Bill has to try to remove Rudy's winter clothes and ends up swinging her around by her sock. Heh, that is a classic scene.

-Humble Master
Question #41475 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Can you find me a high quality picture of the Tabernacle to use as a background? Likewise, can you find me a picture of General Conference with all the General Authorities and the Tabernacle Choir seated?

- Thanks, I love you guys

A: Dear You're Welcome,

Google Image Search is the way to go here. Note that if you click on "Advanced Image Search", you can specify that you want "very large" images, which might be of the resolution you need. You should be able to find a number of candidates there.

Question #41474 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

We have a new roommate next semester. How do we find who our new roommate is on the new housing site?
- Twiglt

A: Dear Twiglt,

Once you have logged into "My Housing Account", select "Agreements" then "Single Student Agreement". Click on the link that says "Winter Semester Only 2008" and it should show you your winter semester roommates.

Question #41470 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Suppose I wanted to go tubing in the newly fallen snow here in Provo and didn't want to travel to a distant tubing facility. Also suppose that I didn't have a tube to go tubing on and desired to obtain one. Or two. Or possible more. Where might I go to accomplish this?

- YourNameHere

A: Dear YourNameHere,

I would go to one of Provo or Orem's many outdoor goods stores - most of the bigger ones (Big 5 and Sports Authority for example) carry sleds and snow tubes for somewhere between fifteen and fifty dollars.

To go try them out nearby, I would recommend that sweet hill at Rock Canyon Park. Yes, it's sometimes crowded there, but for good reason - it's a great hill for sledding and tubing.

Have fun!

Question #41456 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Does law enforcement have a specific policy regarding bad weather speed? I remember way back when I was going through the whole getting-my-driver-license thing, I was taught someting to the extent of "only driving as fast as weather permits." So, what happens if my definition of weather permitting is different from that of any given law enforcement individual I happen to pass?

Buggy, who's mystified by the possibility of getting a speeding ticket for doing "60 in a 65"

A: Dear Buggy ~

From my own personal experience, you will not get pulled over for going too fast for conditions. However, you can get ticketed for it. I have been in two major car wrecks. Both of which were technically my fault, but I couldn't have done anything about them. (I didn't choose to spin across the divided highway in several inches of slush surrounded by traffic. Nor could I help that traffic suddenly... stops. at 12300 S.) Because I was technically at fault, I received the ticket. But in both instances, the very nice police officer admitted that there was nothing I could have done and thus, what do they ticket me for? Both times—too fast for conditions. Oddly, the first one that I really had zero choice, I got a ticket for. The second one, where it could be said that I could have given more room to the guy in front of me or been more aware of traffic, I only got a warning. Maybe it was because I definitely cried more at the second one...

If conditions are bad, (i.e., snow, rain, wind, heavy traffic, etc.) you should slow down. Even if the speed limit is 65, it's ok to only go 60. Or even 50! [gasp!] However, if you choose to go 65, you're probably fine, so long as you aren't being obviously hazardous. (i.e., everyone around you is going 40, you're sliding between lanes, you're fishtailing, you cut off everyone you pass, etc.) Just know, if you cause a wreck, you can and probably will get ticketed for it.

~ Dragon Lady
A: Dear Buggy,

I'll add a bit to Dragon Lady's response. If you end up losing control of your vehicle when driving conditions are bad, then you were going too fast for conditions. It's not a matter of a specific speed guideline; it's just that they expect you to do whatever is necessary to maintain control of your vehicle. Like Dragon Lady said, it seems like you're usually cited only after you've already lost control.

—Laser Jock
Question #41445 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

The TESOL K-12 Minor offered at BYU leads to a Utah State ESL endorsement. Will it also lead to a Michigan State ESL endorsement? Or are there other requirements that I will need to fulfill if I choose to minor in this? Thanks!

- el ed major

A: Dear el ed major,

Most likely. I quote the following from the offical website of the Michigan Teachers of English to Speakers of Other Languages:
If you have a K-12 teaching certificate from the State of Michigan and the qualifications for the endorsement from an out-of-state institution, you can fill out an out-of-state application directly to the Department of Education. A downloadable copy of this application is available.
Take a look at that website to see details on the application. Assuming you meet their requirements, you should be fine.

Question #41434 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

A little while ago I bought an 88 key midi controller to plug into my computer and I love it. I'm not too experienced with midi though. I've been using a program called reason, which is fantastic, but it has a lot of features I don't use right now, and makes my computer run pretty slowly. Basically, I'm looking for a program that will just let me play instrument patches so I can practice. I don't need to record or use a drum machine or add effects or any of that nonsense. Any ideas on good software to use for this? Thanks!

- Nobody's Little Weasel

A: Dear My Little Weasel,

I know that Creative Labs includes such software with their SoundBlaster Live! audio card drivers, but I doubt that it works with other hardware. You might look at the website of your audio card manufacturer (or computer vendor, if the previous is entirely unintelligible to you) to see if they have any downloads.

Other than that, I haven't been able to find anything. It seems that most MIDI software is designed to be more fully featured than that. If a single program is making your computer run that slowly, though, I might suggest that you purchase more RAM to put in your computer. It's amazing the difference that will make, and it's remarkably inexpensive.

Question #41422 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

There is a sign outside the track office that says that there will be time trials on the 13th and 14th. Are these open for anyone? What exactly will we be required to do? And how fast do I have to run the mile to have a chance?

- beep! beep!

A: beep beep -

by the time this posts, it will already be the 14th. looks like none of us know. head over to the track and see if they mind if you join in.


- ghost
Question #41417 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What determines the tempo of a car's blinker? Is this a constant tempo for each individual car? (I know its not the same across the board for every car) Or can it change depending on outward influences?

- mj

A: Dear mj,

There's a good explanation here, but I'll still talk you through what you're seeing.

When you activate your turn signal, current flows through a wire which is wrapped around a curved piece of steel. As the current flows through the wire, the steel heats up, expands, and straightens out, pushing the wire towards a contact which is attached to the light bulb in your turn signal. Once the contacts touch each other, the current starts to flow to the light instead of through part of the wire. This lets the wire cool down which allows the steel to cool down and bend until the contacts no longer touch, at which point the whole process starts again. This happens 1-2 times a second.

There are a lot of factors which can affect the frequency of a turn signal. (As an aside, I can tell you're a musician, because you talked about the signal "tempo.") The basic variables are the rates at which the wire heats up and cools down, and the rate at which the steel expands and contracts in response to the change of temperature. These variables, in turn, could be affected by the composition of the wire and the steel, the dimensions of both, the number of times the wire is wrapped around the steel, the resistance of the light bulb, the ambient temperature, etc., etc. No doubt there are industry specifications which set minimum and maximum frequencies, but there's plenty of room for variation within those tolerances, and yes, you could have some variation from outside factors (such as temperature), although my experience is that it doesn't have a significant effect.

- Katya the physics chick

P.S. See also this.
Question #41412 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I'm running into a research block, so I thought I'd try here. I'm pregnant and I've been doing lots of research on pregnancy and labor and such. There is one thing I can't find: when did 10cm become "the number" for cervical dilation? I'm assuming some study was done and 10cm became the "average" at some point, but I can't find the source of this mysterious study.

I ask because I'm sure some women's bodies would be fully dilated at 9cm and some wouldn't be ready until 11 or even 12. I'm just looking for a source on the matter. Maybe it's just one of those medical myths that became "fact" and no one questions it, because no one seems to cite it.

- From the Source

A: Dear From the Source,

From what I read, it sounds as though 10 centimeters is considered to be full dilation for all women regardless of their size. In one online article that I read, the authors (an MD and an RN) claim that 10 centimeters is considered to be "full dilation" because that measurement is the average diameter of a full-term fetus's head. In all of the many articles I read, though, no one seemed to say what happens if your child has an abnormally large head. If you're concerned about this, I'd ask your doctor.

As for your question about who first came up with 10 centimeters as the standard measurement, I've looked and can't find a name or a date to put with it. This makes sense, though, if you consider that the standard for full dilation is based off of the diameter of a standard baby's head. This idea seems to be based too much on common sense to be considered particularly noteworthy.

Question #41350 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What is the difference between snow and freezing rain? And what sort of conditions would make the sky produce one and not the other?

It never, ever snowed back home, but we got freezing rain on occasion. Here, it's just the opposite!

-I'm Cold

A: Dear Gertrude,

Snow, obviously, is that fluffy white stuff that's all over the place right now. Freezing rain, on the other hand, is a form of precipitation that falls from the sky originally as snow, melts on the way down and falls as rain, and upon landing immediately freezes, forming huge sheets of ice all over everything.

According to Wikipedia, the conditions that will form freezing rain instead of snow are thus:
Usually freezing rain is associated with the approach of a warm front when cold air, at or below freezing temperature, is trapped in the lower levels of the atmosphere as warmth streams in aloft.[3] This happens, for instance, when a low pressure system moves from the Mississippi River Valley toward the Appalachian mountains and the Saint Lawrence River Valley of North America, in the cold season, and there is a strong high pressure system sitting further East. The warm air from the Gulf of Mexico is often the fuel for freezing precipitation.

The warm air is then forced aloft where it dramatically alters the temperature in the middle layer, around 800 mbar (800 hPa). If the advection is strong enough to warm a thin layer several degrees above 0 °C for a brief period or a larger one slightly above 0 °C for a long period, the falling snow into this layer will melt and become rain droplets. These will freeze on contact when they hit the ground, which is still at or below 0 °C.

I hope that answers your question. Where I come from, we get a lot more ice storms (a storm of freezing rain) than we do snow, so I would much prefer freezing rain right now rather than snow, even though it is a lot more dangerous than the snow.

-Kicks and Giggles
Question #41313 posted on 12/17/2007 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I was thinking about prenatal human development just a moment ago, inspired no doubt by Board Question #41148, and I got to wondering. Why a placenta? This question probably came up because of my interest with fish, and more specifically with my heavy involvement with live bearing fish. The majority of live bearing fishes basically have internal development of eggs, with no transfer of nutrients from mother to child. Not only that, but unlike birds, the fry (babies) are born able to take care of themselves.

As I was thinking about this, I got to wondering why exactly it was that humans didn't have a similar developmental process to these fish. I know that there are some snakes that also give live birth, in a manner similar to live bearing fishes, and that isn't really a surprise considering how similar reptiles and fish are. But I couldn't think of any other groups of animals that give birth to live, self sufficient young but don't have a placenta.

So, my first question. What other animals are there that give this kind of birth?

The other part of this question should be pretty obvious I think. And that has to do with why humans don't undergo a similar process. I have thought about this for a while and have a couple examples that I think are evidence for why. The first is the monotremes, the only egg laying mammals. It seems like they have to give some clues. The other is the marsupials. First of all, the monotremes don't exactly fit in, since they actually lay eggs. But they are mammals that have unsupported development of young. Anyway, to keep things shorter. It seems like size of the animal has something to do with this. What do you think?

- Fredjikrang

A: Dear fred,

Humans develop the way we do because of our genetic heritage. We have a longer gestation period and a longer life span, so it stands to reason that our young would require a longer time to mature. Plus, think about how much more a human child has to learn than other mammals. Other than that, the best we can do is tell you that animals bear after their own kind simply because that's the way they were designed by the Creator.

As for your other questions, it's apparent though your question that you know more about the subject at hand than any of us. Your hypotheses seem like they make sense. If you're aching to learn about alternate species that bear self-sufficient young, talk to a Biology professor.