Freedom is nothing but a chance to be better. ~Albert Camus
Question #47749 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

In regards to Board Question #47662, you actually can appear to be offline. If you go down to the bottom right hand corner and click on that torso with the green dot next to him, it'll pop up with an option to make yourself appear offline.

- Duane Reade

Question #47699 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What do boogers taste like?

the little snot

A: Dear little snot,

The general concensus is that they're somewhat salty, slightly sweet, and not too different in taste from what you might have tasted with a runny nose.

A: Dear little snot

Like that one flavor of Bertie Bott's Every-Flavor Beans.

-Humble Master
Question #47697 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

At the city dump, how do they keep making room for new garbage to come in? Do they bury trash and then a few years later bury more trash on top of that?


A: Dear Don't Dress Like That,

The "city dump" is really a thing of the past. What you are thinking of is probably a "landfill." These are not only correct names and proper nouns, but also good descriptions of what they are for and how they are used (see also: necktie, rocking chair). In a landfill trash is flattened, leveled and compacted with bulldozers and huge corrugated, steamrollers so that more trash can be layered on top of that. And they don't wait a few years to put more trash down. Usually it is a matter of days. There is little decomposition of trash in a landfill as most of the trash (which would not decompose for thousands of years anyway) is not in contact with dirt, microorganisms or air. In a dump, trash is heaped up and pretty much allowed to sit, decompose, stink, rot, rust and fester. Landfills are pretty much an excellent solution to a huge problem that no one really wants to deal with.

I recommend this site for a simple overview of landfills (with pictures!).

- Rating Pending (who would like to write a story about a boy named Ruston Fester)
Question #47692 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear habiba,

I apologize that you took my sign off to Board Question #47500 seriously. I meant it purely in jest, and did not mean to offend you, or anyone else. Will you accept my apology?

- Giovanni Schwartz, who is sorry.

A: Dear Gio,

Awww I'm sorry! I apparently misunderstood. Sometimes jest doesn't translate through cyberspace very well. My bizzle.

Question #47686 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Who or what is the US currently at war with? I hear it is currently at war with Iraq....?

- wants to know (correct) history and current events better

A: Dear wants to know,

You heard? ....Really? I'm trying to decide if you're being facetious or if you've really missed the last five years.

We're not so much at war with Iraq as we are at war in Iraq. Congress gave permission for the use of military force in Iraq on October 11, 2002, and we invaded on March 20, 2003. The invasion was over near the end of April and we've been occupying Iraq ever since.

We're also at war in Afghanistan. We invaded on October 7, 2001, but without official permission, in the pursuit of Al-Qaeda. The Taliban are gone, but we're still there.

This is all part of the "War on Terror", which has no clear definition. If you want all the gory details, check out Wikipedia.

-Linoleum Blownapart
Question #47682 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

So here's one for you that I tried to look in the archives but couldn't find anything.
I've talked to a couple friends and have gotten mixed opinions, what do you think about dating an ex's sister? Is that unheard of? I dated this girl for a bit and things just didn't work out for various reasons. She has a sister that I'd like to take out and see where things go. Is this a taboo? Is there a code between sisters? Is it worth the drama that could potentially follow?

- Expert hole digger

A: Dear Ethel,

I'm trying to imagine how well that would have gone over if my sister or I had ever dated the same guy.

Not well at all.

Are there really no other girls in the world?

-Polly Esther
A: Dear Expert~

Oh, the stories I could tell you...

I think the answer is no.

However, if you're sitting there, telling yourself that you can't believe you're about to dive into this stupid relationship, and oh, doesn't love make us crazy and blah blah blah, then heck, I'll give you my endorsement. Go nuts, cause some drama, and leave a flaming wreckage of misery in your wake.

It's the Hobbesian way.

~Hobbes is alarmed that he's not sure whether he's being sarcastic
A: Dear Expert,

I think there's a very high risk of unpleasant consequences, but you have to weigh how important this is to you. Depending on your current terms with your ex, you might even be able to ask her. (This could also be a very bad idea.) There is a (slim) possibility it'll work to ask out the sister, but you're the only one who knows the dynamics between the three of you. Good luck!

—Laser Jock
A: Dear Worried Dude:

My only sister is thirteen years younger than me, so I would be most concerned about this guy robbing the cradle so outrageously.

Assuming this is not your situation, I say to go for it. Hijinks will ensue. Sell the script to Paramount.

A: Dear you're not kidding,

A good friend of mine did that a long time ago. It did not go well.

Question #47680 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Do any computer programs exist that can accurately (or at least usefully) summarize blocks of text?

- Colbert

A: Dear Colbert,

I hereby refer you to the entire subfield of Artificial Intelligence, Machine Learning, and Linguistics which we refer to as Natural Language Processing.

If you want a list of keywords that came from a block of text that would be fairly simple to achieve. If you want a set of the sentences that contain the highest valued key words, that would also be fairly simple. If you wanted a written executive summary type thing using new sentences then it's much harder.

You've managed to trivialize the entire field of NLP into your single question. To rephrase it might look like: "Do any computer programs exist that can understand a piece of text and summarize the point for me?" Getting a computer to "understand" language turns out to be a rather difficult task, but we're trying.

-Curious Physics Minor
A: Dear Colbert,

If you happen to be running OS X on your computer, highlight the text and go to the application menu. (That's the one at the top of the screen with the application's name in bold.) Drop down to Services and select Summarize. If Summarize isn't there, or if you don't see the Services menu, paste the text into something like TextEdit and repeat. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised at how well it does. I've actually used it a few times on the board when I wanted to summarize a long block of text for our readers, and I don't think anyone was the wiser.

Question #47679 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Why do the leaders of the LDS Church absolutely support laws that legislate marriage between a man and a women? One of the principal reasons the LDS Church and its members were persecuted and ridiculed was because of polygamy. The US government disagreed with polygamy, thought it was immoral and tried to impose their matrimonial definition of one women and one man upon the LDS Church. Back in the day, the LDS Church fought against government intrusion into their religious lives, yet today the current LDS Church has taken the same political stance as the old government that persecuted them. Anyway, isn't the LDS Church suppose to be "politically neutral" and why the inconsistency with the political marriage issue?

- a confused observer

A: Dear Ethel,

As far as becoming involved in political matters, the LDS Church becomes involved only in moral issues. In the past they've become involved in such moral issues as liquor, pornography, abortion, etc. Since the LDS Church believes only in marriage between a man and a woman and believes that sexual relationships between those of the same sex is sinful, they most adamantly believe the same-sex marriage issue in California is a moral issue. The Church is strongly supporting Proposition 8 in California, which, if passed, would render illegal same-sex marriages. Again, it is a deeply moral issue to the Church.

Since polygamy in the early days of the Church came by revelation, it's in an entirely different category from same-sex marriage.

-Polly Esther
A: Dear confused~

I've thought about that before, too, and I think your analogy holds water.

I look at this scenario a little differently, though.

We are taught several times in scripture that the health of any society is dependent on the spiritual welfare of that society. At the point that a society becomes degraded beyond mortal redemption, they are either wiped from the Earth or used as a scourge against the righteous.

Understanding this, we have the responsibility to try and keep morality a part of our society in any way we can. I would compare the Church's political antagonism toward gay marriage to their campaign against pornography. It is evil, it is endangering society and a great threat to those temped by it, and it must be eradicated by whatever means necessary.

Do you see how that differs from imposing on people's right to worship how they want?

This is not official Church policy I'm saying here, but my perception of their actions.


PS. I think it should be noted that the government's creation of a law enforcing monogamy can actually be justified under the same logic. There are many Latter-day Saints, self included, who believe the government was justified in protecting what they saw as the moral fabric of society. The manner of its enforcement is where I take serious issues with them.
A: Dear Hobbes,

"Eradication" of gay marriage "by any means necessary" is definitely not church policy. It is also not synonymous with the current actions of "vigorous lobbying for legislation."

I can think of a lot, and I mean a LOT, of means that should never ever, EVER be employed to "eradicate" gay marriage.

- Rating Pending (who thinks that the word eradicate is frighteningly too similar to exterminate)

Question #47678 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Once a military officer has retired, is there ever an occasion when he or she would be asked to or have a right to wear his/her uniform again? Like their dress uniforms?


A: Dear Ethel,

As far as I can tell, what you wear is protected by the first amendment (so long as it's not obscene).

However, the more official answer is:

In general, the uniform may be worn for ceremonies or at official functions when the dignity of the occasion and good taste would dictate the propriety of the uniform. Whenever the uniform is worn, it must be done in such a manner as to reflect credit upon the individual and the service from which retired.

Which I would interpret to mean "go ahead and wear it to whatever you want as long as it makes both you and the military look good!" And, really, when does dressing up ever not make people look good?

The site generally leaves it up to the retiree, so whatever the officer is comfortable doing should be fine.

-Polly Esther
Question #47675 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Several years ago, I saw the Swedish film "Vägen Ut" at some film festival. I really liked it and would like to buy it, but I can't find it anywhere. Do any of you have any ideas of where I can get a copy?

-pom, not swede

A: Dear pom,

I looked everywhere to find out if you could buy this movie legally, and I couldn't find it anywhere available for purchase. I did find a way to get it, but the editors won't let me post it, so you'll have to e-mail me to find out.

Question #47672 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Here's a scenario. You have a cold. You are in biology class. Your nose starts running. You try and sniff to prevent it and it's really loud and attracts a lot of attention. You're in the middle of the row and would have to climb over something like 20 people to get out and go to the bathroom, and then your nose would probably start running again as soon as you got back. You have no tissues with you. What do you do?

The Whole Nother

A: Dear Ethel,

You have a sleeve, don't you?

-Polly Esther
A: Dear The Whole Nother,

"I knew I should've stayed home today!"
-Arnold from The Magic School Bus

Alternate option: Go to the restroom and bring back tissues so you don't have to leave again. Duh.

A: Dear TWN,

Tip your head back, snort, and swallow. Problem solved.

Question #47665 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

So, there is a guy that works where I do that is really cute, but I don't him very well. I work in the front office so everytime he comes or goes I see him and recently I decided that I would just be friendly and start saying hi, smiling, waving, etc. just to see what would happen. The past couple of times I haven't seen him right off, but when I do see him, he has actually been the one to wave or say hi first. This is good right? I've felt like I've made some progress. However, now I don't know what to do to get past the waving and saying hi. There is really no reason I would need him to come to my desk, he doesn't work near my department, I know nothing about him.... I really have no excuse to talk to him. I keep thinking that if he was at all interested, he would make up an excuse to come to my desk... but that's just an assumption and really I have no idea what he's thinking. Maybe he's just being nice by saying hello, because I started it???? I don't know... any advice on how I can get past the "hi" stage would be much appreciated! Thanks, you guys are the best! :)

~What Next?

A: Dear What Next?

Just keep smiling and saying hi, and I'm sure that one day in the unspecified future he will show up at your desk, fall at your feet, and confess his undying love for you. And if he doesn't, well, reality is never as good as your fantasies anyway.

A: Dear What Next?

I have a few ideas for you:

1) Find out if any of your other coworkers knows him better. Get werf to arrange for a group activity and invite you both.

2) Pay attention to clues for how you might start a conversation, such as a book he's reading, the name of a band on his T-shirt, or the Indian food he brought for lunch. "Is that P.G. Wodehouse you're reading? I love his books! Which is your favorite?"

3) You may not be in the same department, but you do work at the same company and probably have some of the same people and policies to deal with. You might ask, "So do you guys over in the ----- department have to change the way you do ----- too?"

Basically, at this point you don't even really know the guy, and need to find some way to associate more with him before he will even consider marching over to your desk and declaring his love for you. Small talk leads to big talk, or at least some way to invite him to do something with you in a more social setting.

Question #47653 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

I have a problem with my major--I generally can't stand a majority of my fellow major-peers. I feel like I'm surrounded by overachieving know-it-alls, which makes me wonder if I'm an overachieving know-it-all. How do I cope with this? Or do I just need to get over myself?

Also, how does one tell if werf is also an overachieving know-it-all?

-Two Years and Counting

A: Dear years,

Here are some questions to guide your introspection into the matter:

When you get something wrong, do you try to make excuses about how it wasn't your fault, and shouldn't have lost points?

Do you make sure to turn in every possible extra credit assignment and then ask the teacher for more?

Do you read every single page of assigned and optional reading for every single one of your classes?

When the syllabus says 5-page paper do you turn in 10?

Do you always feel the need to interject on other people's conversations?

If you do, is that need driven by the urge to correct something you believe was wrong?

Do you start a lot of sentences with "Actually, ....", "That's not true....", or "The real reason...."?

Do you feel it necessary to "win" every conversation?

When something is a matter of opinion, is yours always right, and everyone else's always wrong?

Do you feel it necessary to raise your hand and answer every question the teacher asks?

When a classmate asks a question do you turn to them and start trying to explain it before the teacher has a chance to speak?

(Interesting how so many of these questions could also fit right in on a guide for "Are you an obnoxious jerk?")

That should get you started.

-Curious Physics Minor
A: Dear Ethel,

Aside from the stereotype you will probably have to deal with, I see two situations:

1. You are a know-it-all. If you are, you will eventually reach a point where you claim to know something and over-stretch your knowledge; at which point you will be humbled by some other know-it-all who has hard evidence to the contrary. This will happen as often as is needed until you are sufficiently humbled. God has a way of putting those people in your path. It's very kind of him.

2. You aren't a know-it-all, congratulations! You don't need to worry about anything! Your annoyance of the situation is a sign of your being removed from the one-up-manship.

So either way, the situation is either good or will become good over time. But use CPM's list just to be sure. It's way faster than waiting to see if someone will eventually correct you.

-Polly Esther
A: Dear Know-it-all,

Are you a business major? Because it sounds like you are a business major. You could always come join us in humanities.

--Gray Ghost
A: Dear Two-Years,

The fact that you're questioning your know-it-all status says that you're at least on the right track. Just pay attention to how you act around people, especially people untrained in your field.

Not that it will matter to you, but I genuinely appreciate your efforts to not be a know-it-all, especially if you are a business major. I recently had to spend a few hours with two ridiculous such persons, and got pleasure in watching them make utter fools of themselves around very influential people. Mad props. Keep it real.

Question #47649 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Can you be a Democrat and a Mormon?
If so, why do so many people in the Church think that you can't?

- Might be a Liberal, but I don't know

A: Dear Might be~

For heaven's sake, YES! The Democratic Party has a lot in its stance that is compatible with the Church. The Democrats approach politics with an attitude of wanting to help the poor, protect the Earth, and protecting people's personal freedoms and agency. I disagree with Democrats because I believe the results of their actions are bad, but I would never challenge the purity of their intentions as a group.

You might be interested to know that outside the Republican Fortress that is Utah, there are Mormon Democrats who find it hard to believe that anyone could be a Mormon and a Republican.

Incidentally, I won't go into it here, but I've heard good and intelligent arguments that the Democratic Party's stance on both gay marriage and abortion can be reconciled to membership in the Church, as well. I don't agree with this statement, but you might be interested to know that the argument is out there.

So if you agree with the Democrats, vote for them. You know whether you're a good member of the Church, and your political affiliation will automatically line up with your moral code. If that turns out to be Democrat, more power to you.

A: Dear Ethel,

You know President Faust was a democrat, right? (Yes, I specifically picked someone who is deceased so no one will ask me who he's voting for this year.)

-Polly Esther
A: Dear Might

The members of the Church are welcome to think for themselves. Thusly, you can belong to any political party you want. Also thusly, some members of the Church inexplicably choose to think that you can't be a democrat and a good member.

-Humble Master
Question #47617 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

once someone is declared a son of perdition, is that it? Are they doomed forever? What if they decide to repent? It seems like with the way agency works, no one can truly be declared a son of perdition until the judgment day.

- that girl

A: Dear that girl~

To become a Son of Perdition, one is making an educated decision to follow Satan over Christ. There can be no repentance because this person would under no circumstances repent.

Outer Darkness is no game. It takes effort to get there, and I can only imagine that it breaks our Heavenly Father's heart when any child would make such a choice.

Do I think I know more about being a Son of Perdition? Why yes, but a lot of it is just conjecture from scriptures in the Doctrine and Covenants, so I'll just leave it at that rather generic definition.

A: Dear girl,

With a nod to Hobbes' reticence to speculate, I am going to go ahead and do so. Mildly and hopefully intelligently.

Sometimes I think that we don't understand exactly how big the end consequences of what our life here is all about. The eventual result of our eternal existence is eternal (I repeat for emphasis, eternal!) life. This is by no means easy. This is huge. It is so huge and so difficult and so mind-bending that an immortal being had to die. God had to suffer the humiliation and pain and shame of the lowest, vilest, cruelest sinners. C. S. Lewis appropriately called the Atonement "the grand miracle" and clearly it is the greatest miracle that God ever wrought. It is utterly unfathomable.

Why the lead up? Because as hard as it is to become exalted and take full advantage of that Atonement and live up to the laws that govern the mediation of such a great reward, I personally believe it is harder to become a Son of Perdition. It is hard, bordering impossible! Only a small, small handful of the population of this world will even have a chance to gain the kind of undeniable knowledge that one has to somehow then deny to "qualify" to be a son of perdition. To deny the efficacy and the reality and the role of the Savior after having received an unequivocal knowledge of the reality of those things? . . .

I think that they cannot repent not because of some arbitrary rule in Heaven that says "Article II Subsection 3- Sons of perdition cannot repent." I think they have lost the ability, the desire to ever begin to have the faith in Christ necessary to receive forgiveness. And if someone does still have that faith? Or that desire to have faith? Well, then I would say that they probably haven't qualified to become a son of perdition.

I cannot conceive of eternity. I can't really conceive of God in His entirety. And I can't conceive of the kind of attitude or loss of faith, hope and spirit to be able to deny those first two things having once understood them.

- Rating Pending (who hopes that his speculations were alright with you, but more that they were alright with God)
A: that girl,

Personally I've never thought it was as difficult as some make it out to become a son of perdition. When I consider their capacity to repent when compared to their agency, I think of the other extreme. Does God have the agency to choose to sin? While they still maintain their agency, their character has become so established in one extreme that the desire to do anything contrary is non-existent.

Question #47589 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

My best friend goes to byu in utah. I plan on following after my mission. He & I started an online duel, so to speak, all in fun, and he stated that he could only envision our combat taking place on (or over, for that matter) byu's campus.

Where does this link up with y'all? I'm curious to know the best spots on byu campus and where they are for our exotic duel - including but not limited to the Enterprise, Star Destroyers and Magma Monkeys. And a random lightning bolt.

-A Virginian

PS_Oh, and the tunnel worms, y'all have been theorizing about them. They're actually slightly related to Dune's spice-wyrms...just smaller...and they don't smell as nice. And I sent them to byu as a present to all you fun, loveable & crazy Utards. Thought you might want to know.

When Lorenzo the Third sees this, he'll just start laughing.

A: Dear Not Lorenzo:

I vote for the quad between the Wilk and the HFAC.

A: Dear You,

I would recommend the grassy area just to the southwest of the Maeser Building. Plenty of space, columned building looming in the distance, and signs warning against being there after dark. Very dramatic.

A: Dear name,

Top of or inside of the planetarium.

- Rating Pending (who frankly isn't a fan of the term, "utard." He would not call anyone, for example, a "californicator." Nor an "idaho.")
A: Dear Virginian,

My vote is for the first floor of the HFAC. Plenty of places to hide and jump out from. Oh, did you mean a non-ninja dual? In that case the roof of the JFSB might be more suitable.

A: The best place to stage such a duel would very likely be in our lair. I mean, we've already got the Enterprise B, and Thor left a number of lightning bolts just lying around. Unfortunately for you, getting into the lair is no small challenge in and of itself. Oh, and if the tunnel worms find out that it was you that sent that pack of wanna-be punk worms over awhile back, they'll probably treat you even less kindly than they treated your "present". And we as writers would rather not have to pick our way through tunnels that messy ever again.

Though you weren't joking about the smell, I don't know what your little worms smelled like while they were still in the categories of "larger than a breadbox" and "not horribly mangled" but I only wish that we were "theorizing" about that unforgettable smell.

When the people lack a proper sense of awe, then some awful visitation will descend upon them.(LXXII,1)


PS. The Enterprise would be destroyed by a Star Destroyer, which is why we keep it in the Lair. Ever since Hobbes went and kiped that Star Dreadnought, we've had to keep expensive targets to a minimum.

PPS. And no, he still hasn't apologized for the whole Pluto incident. I guess in a way, its size was a factor in its being "decommissioned" as a planet...
Question #47585 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Do you think it would be accurate and fair to say that Arcade Fire sounds like what ELO would have been if they had gotten together thirty years later than they did? My roommate says no way, but I say absolutely yes.

- Darth Fedora

A: Dear Darth,

I find this theory intriguing.

Unfortunately for you, I'm going to have to side with your roommate on this one.

I love ELO. Listening to them is like eating a big piece of candy. It's sweet, it makes you want to move around a lot, and it will probably rot your teeth if you listen to too much. It's incredibly obvious that Jeff Lynne was probably as big of a Beatles fan as Foreman and I. His Beatles-esque pop style is just...well, it's just great is what it is. It is most often sunny, laden with harmonies, and composed of great hooks. Further, Lynne was a perfectionist. Listen to "Turn To Stone." Every single note in that piece was placed with precision. He was probably a Nazi in the studio, making sure every band member lived up to his exacting specifications. Oh, and speaking of the studio, Jeff Lynne followed in the footsteps of his idols, the Beatles: he preferred the studio to the stage, feeling that the former was more conducive to his creativity.

Now let's look at Arcade Fire. I love these guys too. The comparisons and contrasts here are a bit difficult, seeing as they've only released two albums, but we'll see what we can do. Arcade Fire, to me, sounds constantly on the edge of sonic self-destruction. Their music contains an energy that their songs seem barely able to keep in. I mean, listen to the end of "Power Out" when Win Butler starts screaming, the guitars start sounds just about ready to burst. ELO never created that feeling with their orchestral masterpieces. Further, I have read from a number of sources that Arcade Fire seems to get a great deal of pleasure from their shows. I've heard that the concerts are filled with energy that make them an amazing band to watch. Oh, and also, Arcade Fire doesn't drench their songs in keyboards and strings nearly as often as ELO. Finally, Win doesn't have nearly as good ("good" being used to describe technical musicality, not emotional conveyance) of a voice as Jeff...not to mention that Arcade Fire's only occasional use of vocal harmony isn't close to how much harmony ELO used.

So, while I don't think you're crazy, I don't think you're completely right either. I did, however, find a list of songs that do sound like ELO. Check it out. Oh, and by the way, a quick search on the Googles turned up a few people that agree with you.

A: Dear Darth,

I hadn't head ELO until now, and I'm going to have to say that while ELO and Arcade Fire have certain similarities, I don't think they sound like the same band in different eras. Also, I think Arcade Fire is definitely more disgusted with America based on their lyrics (seriously, sometimes I too think, "I don't want to live in America no more").

Question #47570 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

When you drive to Utah Lake, the gate is closed at night to prevent people from driving in, but there is nothing placed to prevent people from walking on by. Would it be trespassing then to walk by the gate and go on it?

- Out For a Midnight Stroll

A: Dear Out,

Yes, it would. Utah Lake is a state park. Hours are 6 a.m. - 10 p.m. summer, 8 a.m. - 5 p.m. winter.

Question #47553 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

O omniscient 100 Hour Board,

As I have been walking through the wilk lately (on the side with the Jamba Juice) I have been running into a set of closed doors on my way to the bus stops. Last year these doors were almost never shut but now they are almost never open. Why the change?

Two-Tone Shoes

P.S. I had another question but before I could make it to a computer I forgot what it was. Could you also answer that question too?

A: Dear two,

Why yes, you should hand-deliver me a steak and potatoes dinner. Thank you!

Dark Chocolate, answering your second question, obviously.
A: Dear Two-Tone,

Because no one ever props them open. It was probably a change in custodial staff. You're welcome to prop them open yourself.

Question #47525 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Shout out to all BYU Catering employees...
Here's the question: In the BYU Catering main kitchen on the Wilk's 3rd floor, all the silverware and some other stuff are stored in what's known as "The Flower Room." Rumor has it that this closet/room thing used to be equipped with coolers and BYU floral services kept flowers there, but nobody seems to be able to find any hard evidence for this. So now it's called "The Flower Room" and nobody really knows why for sure. Is there any truth to this rumor, and if not, why the random name? Thanks, you guys are the


A: Dear Catholic,

I used to know this, I'm wildly irritated I can't remember. I've talked to all the most senior of Catering employees and former employees that I know - the most senior I've been able to catch has been gone from Catering for at least three years, and he'd been there awhile when I worked there. So! I am putting my best foot forward for you, that's for sure.

Here's the path I went through ...

"I think it's called the Flower Room because we used to keep flowers in there. But I'm not sure."-Apple Core

"You know, I'm not sure, but have you talked to Your Friend? You should Facebook him and see if he knows."-Baltimore

"They call it the flour room because at one point a long time ago, flour was stored there. I want to say the pastry kitchen was also close to that room at one point as well." -Who's

"If I can recall correctly, I think it is the flour room, because the pastry kitchen used to be up there and that is where they stored the flour. I am not 100% but that makes sense to me since real flowers would have to be refrigerated to stay fresh, and there is no way old refrigerators would work in there. Have you called Doug? He knows everything. But that is the story I most believe is true, but alas it is still an opinion, maybe not good enough for the 100 Hour Board." -Your Friend?

That's when I called Doug Who Knows Everything, a former Catering employee who was actually around at the time of the usage change ... (This one is in italics, because it's the true story, and he told it to me in a mystical voice.)

Once upon a time, we kept flowers in there - our fresh centerpieces. We actually had coolers in there at one time, and it was named the Flower Room. During the renovation about 12 or 13 years ago, it was changed from a Flower Room to the storage room, but the name stuck with the Flower Room. When we did that renovation, that refrigeration was torn out and it was turned into just a regular storage room, but again, because it had been called that for years, no one wanted to change the name, and it stayed the Flower Room. That's the moral of the story.

-Doug Who Knows Everything


You can see, best beloved, that when the wisest and most senior student employees are still unsure, you have a legend on your hands. Congratulations on unraveling it ... and on being right in the first place, though it doesn't appear the flowers belonged to the floral services.

So, that ... is the rest of the story.

Question #47499 posted on 09/30/2008 3:01 a.m.

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Do you know where in Provo or Orem you can get your clothes steamed? (Instead of ironing them)

- traveled

A: Dear traveled ~

I know you can get your wedding dress, veil, and slip steamed at Alyse's Bridal in University Mall. And if you are running late for your own wedding because your veil had a hole ironed into it, they'll even do it for free. (Maybe they'd do it for free anyway... I dunno.) Other than that, I have no idea. Except maybe at a dry cleaner.

~ Dragon Lady
A: Dear traveled,

Most retail stores own a steamer. If you know anybody that works retail, maybe they could hook you up. You can also buy small steamers, or hang things up in a very steamy bathroom.