By elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy. -George Carlin
Question #90970 posted on 02/19/2018 10:48 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Isn't this fun?!
Isn't this what life's all about?!
Isn't this a dream come true?!
Isn't this a nightmare toooooo?

-Oingo Boingo

A:

Dear O,

The Board is fun and all that, but no, it is not actually the purpose of all life.

-apathetic

Question #90961 posted on 02/19/2018 4:36 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

As I was walking to the Testing Center, I noticed that between the Brimhall building and the JSB there is a tree by the bike racks. The tree in question has a metal wire that was attached to one of the branches at one end, and was dangling a sawed off branch on the other end.

Any ideas for the purpose of this coniferous conundrum?

-Trying to Look Up More

A:

Dear Up,

For those who are unaware of this mysterious branch I venture yonder to the land between the Brimhall and JSB to provide some photographic evidence.

9E11184F-8D6C-4715-B94A-61AAE76128B6.jpeg

(Sorry it's sideways, formatting pictures on the board is hard sometimes)

A peculiar piece of plantage indeed. My theory is that the wire was attached to a branch to provide additional support and to prevent it from crashing down upon students in the event of the branch breaking. I think that the branch broke, and grounds crew found it would be a lot more convenient and nicer to the tree to just saw off the excess branch rather than yank the wire out from the trunk. Thus we are left with a miniature hanging log. Anyways, that's just my guess. If anyone knows the actual reasons for this feel free to drop a correction.

Peace,

Tipperary

Question #90959 posted on 02/19/2018 3:24 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Okay I know you're not lawyers but

I'm a freelance artist and I bought a taxidermy crow for kicks and it cost a pretty penny but then I realized I can use it as an anatomy reference (I draw a lot of birds, dead and otherwise), AND IF I DO, can I write the cost of the crow off my taxes as a business expense??

- Crow Mom

A:

Dear denizen of brownie hell,

So, knowing who you are, I'd like draw everyone's attention to the fact that YOU SPENT ENOUGH MONEY ON A TAXIDERMY CROW TO CONSIDER USING IT AS A TAX WRITE-OFF. Which is a decision in and of itself. 

I went for the easy way out but, surprisingly, taxidermy crow/any variant of birds (dead or alive) did not come up on any list of things you can write off on your taxes, even on Entrepreneur's "75 Items You May Be Able To Deduct From Your Taxes". I guess you're just gonna have to decide this one on your own with your brain powers.

Keep it real,
Sherpa Dave

posted on 02/20/2018 9:10 p.m.
I'm a tax accountant; however, I'm not officially certified yet, so take my advice as you will.

If you file a Schedule SE, you can claim deductions that are "ordinary and necessary" for your work. If you can argue that the taxidermy crow is ordinary and necessary for someone in your line of work, I would say you could deduct it. Keep all receipts/records that you can, in case of an audit.

https://quickbooks.intuit.com/r/professional/complete-list-of-self-employed-expenses-and-tax-deductions/

I'm assuming you file a Sch. SE because you asked if you could write it off as a business expense. But just in case I'm wrong...you definitely can't write it off as on your personal income tax return.

Happy tax season!
posted on 02/20/2018 9:10 p.m.
If you have tax questions, I highly recommend VITA (volunteer income tax assistance)! You can go into a clinic and trained specialists can answer your questions and help file your returns for free. BYU has a very active program, but it's also nationwide if you don't live in the Utah Valley area.
Question #90908 posted on 02/19/2018 3:24 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

At one point there was a regular event at BYU where people met just to play orchestral music. Everyone would practice on their own and then meet up so that they could all have the chance to play a famous piece. Is this group still a thing?

Thanks,

music

A:

Dear music,

Sorry to tell ya, but none of my friends who do orchestra stuff at BYU know anything about this, or anything like it. I doubt it's still a thing if they don't know about it, and I have no idea how to investigate further. Good luck!!

Keep it real,
Sherpa Dave

Question #90905 posted on 02/19/2018 3:24 p.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

When, "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints" issues a statement, for example, this, is that the First Presidency, the Quorum of the Twelve? An intern in the Mormon Newsroom?


-DACADACADACA

A:

Dear DACA,

Although I doubt that the First Presidency writes these statements, I imagine that someone higher up than an intern is penning them. However, I'm 90% sure that the First Presidency reads them before they are released.

But who knows? Maybe President Nelson paces around his office, dictating these statements to an intern that's furiously scribbling down notes and then they go type it up. So both, maybe?

-Mitty

A:

Dear DACA,

Here's what I would say. If it's signed by the First Presidency it's almost certainly written by them, or at least primarily written by them. If it isn't signed by anyone, as is the case with the DACA statement, it's most certainly just written by a writer for the Mormon Newsroom.

Keep it real,
Sherpa Dave

Question #90963 posted on 02/19/2018 10:18 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

At what point in a relationship/friendship/getting-to-know-you-stage would you use the heart eyes emoji with some of the opposite sex?

Thanks,
apparently most people would use it much sooner than I would...

A:

Dear you,

It's going to be different for every person, of course. Personally, I'm not an emoji fan, so using one at all would imply a degree of emotional familiarity that can't be communicated by words. So if I were to use it at all, it wouldn't be until after I had already communicated my love to the person.

Love,

Luciana

A:

Dear Sooner,

I just wouldn't use the heart-eyes emoji at all because I barely ever use emoji. I prefer emoticons because they are less defined and therefore leave more to the imagination.

-Frère Old-Timer

A:

Dear Apparently,

Um, like once you're married. Before that I don't think I ever sent heart-eye emojis to anyone (but then, I'm not a big emoji user).

-Alta

A:

Dear you,

Apparently I'm an outlier here, because I don't have any qualms with using such emojis in casual texting conversations, including conversations with the opposite gender. Not that I've actually used that emoji in such a situation, but I can easily see myself using it if it just seems to fit with the current conversation--though most likely I'd be using it ironically.

~Anathema