Whenever he thought about it, he felt terrible. And so, at last, he came to a fateful decision. He decided not to think about it. ~John-Roger and Peter McWilliams
Question #47417 posted on 09/12/2008 3:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear Vandergroot (RE: Board Question #47297),

The best way to meet attractive Irish dancing men is to go to the Rec Nights held by the BYU Folk Dance club.

You'll not only get to meet those attractive men, but you'll get to dance with them as well. It doesn't matter if you don't know any of the dances. They'll teach you. And there are always refreshments as well. It's really quite easy and painless. They teach particularly easy dances at the beginning of the semester, because Rec Night is in part meant to be a practice night for the beginning folk dance classes (although anyone is invited).

They generally have Rec Nights on Wednesdays at 7 pm in 270-278 RB. But not every Wednesday - only about twice a month. I am not currently in Provo, so you're on your own to figure out which Wednesdays, I'm afraid.

Cheers,

-Tangerine

Question #47356 posted on 09/12/2008 3:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

What are all the 57 flavors that heinz makes?

- heinz57

A: Dear Dean,

Actually "Heinz 57" refers to the number of products offered for sale made by Heinz. You can read more about it here on wikipedia.

-Azriel
Question #47355 posted on 09/12/2008 3:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Is there a way to apply for a special poorman's food plan? I am using the cheapest one with the smallest allotment, but between my food plan and my roommate's, we buy enough food for both of us using one food plan. Is there some way to get the money back that they are siphoning from my bank account?

- Poor Richard

A: Dear Richie:

Short answer: no. If you want to spend less money, then you can choose to not have a meal plan, and shop off-campus instead.

Hmm. It just occurred to me that you could be, and probably are, a freshman. Well, that was part of your housing contract, and if you didn't want that to be part of it, I guess you shouldn't have lived on campus?

It's all about sharing the love. Find a sibling, an attractive female Board writer (we are suckers for free food), a random upperclassman to share it with. Also, the first week I returned to off campus, I lived off food I had stocked up on with money I accrued on my meal plan. This kept me from starving. Once it is gone, you will miss it: buy flour and sugar and soup now, and take it with you when you move off campus. If you live in Helaman Halls, you can use the Wyview creamery: not everyone seems to know that.

One thing you can do is request that meals be moved from certain dates to others: if you are going out of town, say. Small consolation, perhaps, but some, nonetheless.

---Portia
Question #47352 posted on 09/12/2008 3:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

Is Kefir against the Word of Wisdom? I'm guessing it is, but I thought I'd ask anyways.

- Lu

A: Dear Lu~

No. It isn't.

If you feel bad about drinking it, though, then don't, and I won't think any worse of you for it.

~Hobbes
Question #47350 posted on 09/12/2008 3:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

My driver's license got stuck to the magnet on my phone and I'm pretty sure the magnetic strip is all messed up now. Does this matter? How can I fix it? Will it cost money to get a new one? This is an Ohio license, by the way.

- Candy Floss

A: Dear Ethel,

Sorry, but your driver's license is probably completely blank now -- as far as the magnetic strip is concerned anyways. If your phone is the one I'm thinking of (a sidekick 3?) then there is no doubt. A replacement will cost you $19.50.

As a side note, my mom had a problem with the magnet in her purse disabling her credit card's magnetic strip before we realized what was happening. Magnets: Play Carefully.

-Polly Esther
Question #47349 posted on 09/12/2008 3:01 a.m.
Q:

Dear 100 Hour Board,

My neighborhood has recently been infected with a very noisy, very inconsiderate rock band that practices either in someone's back yard or garage. So, whenever they practice, everyone around them for several blocks knows.

The band used to practice on weekday afternoons, which I could tolerate. However, they apparently have decided that the middle of the night and Sundays are good times to practice. My question is, am I justified in calling the police on them? Does Provo have a curfew? I'm guessing I can't get anything done about Sunday afternoon practice sessions, but can I call someone to put an end to the midnight noise? If so, who do I call?

- Getting really, really annoyed

A: Dear Getting ~

I would suggest calling them first.

~ Dragon Lady
A: Dear Hater,

Hey there, all you middle men!
Throw away your fancy clothes.
And while you're out there sittin' on a fence
So get off your [bottom] and come down here
'Cause rock 'n' roll ain't no riddle, man...
To me it makes GOOD, GOOD SENSE!

Heavy decibels are playing on my guitar,
We got vibrations coming up from the floor.
We're just listening to the rock that's giving too much noise;
Are you deaf? You wanna hear some more?

We're just talkin' about the future,
Forget about the past!
It'll always be with us
It's never gonna die...NEVER GONNA DIE!

Rock 'n' roll ain't noise pollution
Rock 'n' roll ain't gonna die
Rock 'n' roll ain't noise pollution
Rock 'n' roll, it will survive!
Yes it will!

Rock 'n' roll ain't noise pollution.
Rock 'n' roll ain't gonna die.
Rock 'n' roll ain't no pollution.
Rock 'n' roll is just rock 'n' roll!

-AC/DC
A: Dear getting annoyed,

With due respect to Mssrs. A & D C, any intentionally caused sound above 55 dB between the hours of 10 pm and 7 am in a residential area is noise pollution, as per Provo City Ordinance 9.06.030 (and Board Question #11343). (For reference, normal conversations are between 55 and 65 dB in volume, so your neighbors shouldn't be doing anything in their house or garage which you can hear louder than a normal conversation in your house.)

I agree with Dragon Lady that you should definitely try talking to the members of the rock band first about preferable practice times. However, if they won't cooperate, go ahead and place a non-emergency call to the police. I'm sure the whole neighborhood will thank you.

- Katya
A: Dear Getting~

I know I would thank you. Just the other day I had to be the grouchy old geezer who went out and shut up the giggling girl squad in my apartment parking lot at 12:30.

One downside of the Honor Code is that it drives people out into public to undergo their obnoxious flirtation. (There were boys who growled and snarled to scare the girls, who then shrieked in response. If you thought only the dorms were plagued with this, how wrong you were.)

~Hobbes